“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” --Maya Angelou

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Tyson Mistakenly Believed His Life Was "A Waste"...Bullshit

What is this bullsh*t?

First of all its perfectly normal for young people especially in western culture to be selfish until they get older and start to see thier place as elders in society. And talented or superior people are going to especially be this way. Just be thankful of you do evolve becuz its the people that dont evolve past youth in old age that are lost, and that means looking beyond yourself. Turning from warrior into elder statesman. Self loathing is not however, a healthy way to do this. Probably years of the system f*cking with him.

Second of all I am not African American and even I use Mike's fighting as inspiration in my battles. I am sure many African Americans especially young men were inspired by his success but people of all cultures. This culture is obsessed with destroying champions especially nowadays. Dont let em do it to ya.

What waste? I think this self regret I hope it isnt coming from brain damage from too many fights if so, handle it then. Becuz that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. Its so common for this culture to reward men for thier hardness and violence but to neglect the spirit and soul of the athlete. Its like they are on thier own. Its a sad side effect of this culture.

It seems that physically superior people often have more spiritual issues than others..perhaps we are all around superior beings which is something the system does not want us to know. Its determined to take what success we do have in a certain area and limit us to that and especially phase us out when our prime is over. I notice this is especially the case with people that come out of extreme poverty, as if the elite are frightened of all kinds of superior powers coming from individuals who excel in life at something. Perps have hinted that I like others targeted are as such becuz they did the same to Tupac- they fear extremely brilliant, intelligent, talented or any other exceptional ability from the lower classes. Its amazing but in this day and age there is still that keep down going on. I have seen it first hand.

Its so easy to break someone born into poverty emotionally. These assholes know just where to hit too. Its a different sort of fight and its typical that a man this powerful physically can be messed with emotionally. Whats funny is that he has the insight to consider spiritual values...haha. How many people who think they are better than he do not?

They are scared of the Titans. I truly believe its intergenerational DNA like a bloodline or spiritual possessions at birth..they know who these people are and keep them in check. I notice people like this are always allowed to screw themselves when they are young and dont know any better but when they get old enough to be wise they are given alot of 'bad luck' etc etc.

Well Tyson and Ali have helped me to stay inspired as well as other athletes and fighters. Im a girl and have to relate to the physical battles with the fighting I do, since I can never have that kind of body. Its also great to see men acting out primitively, not with buying a stupid pick up truck to compensate for thier lacking but really showing they have what it takes to destroy a saber tooth tiger that attacks our tribe or warring with enemies as this is where women's heads are at when watching competitors.

I notice that he came up with Italians and Irish training him and after leaving that he lost his discipline. Maybe people got him to do just that to help bring him down. I think its disgusting if its true promoters took his money. I havent read the whole story.

There is something in this culture that needs to destroy Titans to control society itself. From Tyson to Marylin Monroe.

For anyone who is inspired by Tyson his life is not 'a waste'. And selfishness is encouraged by the very people who use it to destroy Titans in thier later years, hmph, when they cant make money off of them anymore after thier prime. Manipulation is thier strength, and its sneaky, deceptive and takes a mob to pull off. Forget them.

Tyson is, like my black metal artists, the Betty Grable pin ups men use to keep around in wartime. They provide example to keep fighting and do so to win, and also, its encouraging seeing men work and fight- act like MEN, not like control freak cry babies in pick up trucks with shaved heads, baggy pants and a mob mentality to keep society supporting thier weakness and stupidity, with weak, beta females assisting them.

It calms me. When I walk through Maverick and all those big, solid Latin men are around me, with thier family values and not messing with women on the street, I feel calmed. Becuz REAL women can act and feel like women ONLY WHEN THERE ARE REAL MEN AROUND. Its a fact, and it seems based on physical chemistry. The reason I freak out so much in Boston and areas like that is all these skinny, so not talented or special hipsters, YUPpies and metrosexuals that make up the male population in such places nowadays. It makes me feel I have to be the strong one, on some level I dont feel safe or protected.

We need superior examples of physicality, talent etc as inspiration. The system is just pissed becuz Mike came from the ghetto, and cant be kept above the rest of us with that intimated snobbery that is so annoying in the way other people who rep 'the best' are marketed. Hes dangerous in his ability to inspire the weakest of us..they dont want that. And the primitive male energy is a threat to the entire male set up, which is transparent as hell once your estrogen starts to wane in this society- thus phasing out women at a certain age. The whole game is worse than ever now.

Still any of 'the best' even from antiquity is worth using for inspiration.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Gang Stalking as Psy Ops On Target Communities in NWO Society

Hiding out somewhere much more mello. Somewhere that seems to have been left behind by society.

Near the colleges and in the YUPpie areas its unbearable nowadays. The people management via tech is obviously worse now than in years before but I now believe that many of the obnoxious people that keep messing with not only TI's but the general population within daily crowds might be part of 'people management' as well.

I have seen this sort of person screwing around on the CB in the trucking industry, messing with people on purpose causing chaos, making drivers disgusted so they turn off thier CBs. Destroying the culture and community and subculture. The one I met on the road that was doing this while being a driver was African American and had just come out of the military..hmmm.

Many people experience these antagonizers in Central Sq and downtown Boston. In Harvard and other areas the antagonizers tend to be rich whites students it looks like often. I have personally experienced a musician that obviously was not welcome or 'in' with the ruling entities in Harvard Sq becuz some college looking girls mobbed him and drove him out of the area he never returned.

It just seems like there is a constant gang stalking like campaign being perpetrated on the general public in specific areas they want control over as well as within certain sub cultures and groups they want to dismantle, the trucking industry is an example of this.

When you get to an area where there is not this constant chaos causing element, you realize how insane the constant circus is, and that it seems so contrived- it IS a circus created to cause chaos which causes strict order and rigidity in response.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Metal Going Pop IS The Ultimate SInister Evil Betryal-Hey Its What They Do

Gee, why is Infernus from Gorgoroth on the cover of the new Cannibal Corpse production? He looks terrible? And without corpse paint! I notice that after that whole Bush era and that lawsuit its the first time he started showing his face in pics. Like now there is nothing to lose from doing so. But here he just looks awful. Maybe listening to the grindcore crap he put out instead of the good old stuff with real energy has made him into a bloodthirsty zombie? Or was he that already to begin with?

And CC could NOT think of a color combo more original than the old black white and red that is so obnoxiously everywhere nowadays? Of all thier cover artwork over the years (which strangely seemed to favor blues, whites and oranges in the artists work along with black for darkness and red for blood or 'eeevviill!'.) this is what comes now?

And what of Mayhem taking the band down another notch and having the drummer from Slipknot tour with them? Its just the next step down from performing in Israel which was disgusting. Maybe if they put MAZDA on something and werent Abrahamic reactionaries (which validates Abrahamic religions) they would have actually been banned becuz that is the only thing the Jews truly fear is any historical documentation that wakes up a dumbed down public to the truth that they are not the root of everything known to man and thier religion comes from an older polytheistic religion as well as from older religions from surrounding areas and peoples. The only metal band to be banned in Israel did so for just that afore mentioned motive- NOT for Satanic content.

Looks like the enslavement of mankind is on still and must consist of any entity that once produced true energy to motivate, stimulate or strengthen must now join the ranks of hella-stupid pop mainstream which of course is the very definition of torture and evil so you must expect that. And selling out is just betrayal which is what they were born to do, or so thier old lyrics tell us all so.

Just keep listening to the old stuff. Its a joy to use these guys as bitches to wring out what energy you can get to fight back against this elite-enslave-mankind bullshit that spans across social stratas, classes even (ahh the ever cooperative houseslaves), races and cultures even genres.

Maybe thier next move will be to do beer ads with now socially and economically powerful gangsta rappers who also seem to like black and red and satanic Illuminati elitist crap symbolism.
UPDATE: I found this (Immortal plays same bill as .50 Cent rapper garbage- http://waldemardaninskyjr.blogspot.com/2011/07/black-metal-in-news-junejuly-mmxi.html

I am going to pretend firstly that I did not see this and secondly if it does run through my mind I will imagine they will ignore the other shitheads on the bill. I want to vomit but since last week I had the flu I have done so enough.

Jennifer Lopez-A Prime Example Of Celebrity As Product

Why is she so successful as in this article asks:


"I dont know why she hasnt worked in months"... first of all when you do a movie like The Cell you help out the intelligence community with mass mind control brainwashing as well as media psy ops on specific Targeted Individuals and hey, that has its rewards. Secondly, many celebrities today may have talents they are supposedly famous for yet many of them are simply Product themselves. Years ago this was unacceptable when it first turned up as in the case of one the first modern type celebrity who, ironically I actually cant remember her name-Tia Maria or something like that. Some very rich guy's wife I think- who was ranked on constantly for being famous for nothing more than BEING FAMOUS. Back then it was something new, but they gave her some singing career I think just to prove she was capable of something to quiet a confused public. Interestingly, most celebrities nowadays may have careers in entertainment but most are sold on thier face and image. They are the thing that sells and the magazines like TMZ, People etc etc have become numerous nowadays -thier only purpose is to repeat these images until the image of the person itself becomes the desired product by the public. Jo Lo may have significant singing talent but many people become product themselves and what they do doesnt matter anymore.

This of course is part of dumbing down America and mass mind control via simple ancient brainwashing techniques. However it wouldnt work without all the other factors like taking away recreational drug use and replacing it with psych medications, work more-earn less, terror mongering, forced Diversity and Political Correctness mandated at the same time as gangsta rap culture destroying civility and sanity, etc etc. I think we all get it by now.

That's why she's always going to do well no matter what she does or doesnt do. She works for just the right people and she herself is a well selling product with the public.

Her and Tyler are in good company on that horrible mind f*ck of a show Star Search..or whatever it is. At least that English jerk made an art out assh*ledom but hey, Europe is always going to be more artful no matter what.

Nowadays one must judge according to new perceptions becuz the old ones are being used to fool us if not destroy us. Fame must be mistrusted becuz its used as a Trojan Horse. What is it that they are really pushing with a celebrity nowadays? What are they selling or what effect do they have on the viewer? People no longer just entertain and mind thier own business as you mind yours. Much of what goes on now is psychological manipulation and warfare outright. And they think this new value system of Fame/Wealth= Good People is going to make everyone passable. If you are wise you wont let anything pass through your filters that isnt what you believe in or hold dear. Becuz the biggest ideology they are peddling is to believe in NOTHING except the Media Machine which is incredibly dangerous and we see the results all around us.

What specific beliefs does Lopez have that makes her stand out? Nothing. Zilch. These people represent the pretty, comfort zone side of the system. They have become the country's new drug habit- watching celebrities. Which is a great way to fill in the gap after you have pushed 'Just Say No!' for decades. Stars being one of the opiates of the masses is one thing but there is supposed to be a division between private life and media. Too many people embrace pop culture as if it were thier own family and this keeps them on the side of the system. The worst part is they dont do it willfully as some sort of creative problem solving or a child that goes through a phase with posters of one person all over thier walls- they do it very unknowingly.

I have seen this phenomena before years ago in my late teens. Some girls were discussing dramas and lives as thier own in a gossip conversation. I was shocked to learn they were actually discussing their "stories" from day time television. It was one of my first experiences realizing not only how low the intelligence of the people can be which is dangerous to the rest of us, but how easy it is to control and run the perceptions of the public- to have them live in daydreams. A false reality. Humans are way to susceptible to this and its one of the reasons they DONT want people to experiment with drugs or sex becuz those experiences not only test the meddle of the individual but allow them to know thier own minds. To become familiar with thier own consciousness.

The empowerment of human beings is probably the single biggest threat to the system that runs our lives, especially in America, and makes nothing but animalistic consumers out of us. And it will stop at nothing to keep people asleep and weakened.

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Leader Bank Central Square Cambridge MA, USA/You are all gonna pay some day some how

They were so nice usually and thier ATM is free and it gives 10's!

Sadly when I went to open an account after seeing I owed Bank Of CIA...I mean Bank of America money I guess any bank wont open one for me now. Strange I freaked out and closed my accounts eh?

I explained I cant pay them off anyway cause money in PayPal is stuck now along with whatever else is coming soon from other resources this Indian guy starts interrogating me like he has that right. "Oh so you work too?" I explained ONCE AGAIN it was a non profit and I had a blog where I get donations, very little usually. When I was getting together to leave he and this much nicer bald man of African descent made me feel very uncomfortable just standing there near his desk, facing me, staring at me, as if I was going to steal something on the way out. VEERRYY undignified and extremely rude. Of course I kept my usual steeled face and composure. Then the Indian man who's desk I it was piped up and asked through the silence "So what brings you to Cambridge?" and it was NOT friendly in nature it was accusatory, interrogating and being used for intimidation. This is the same guy who was highly suspect when I used the phone on permission of one of the tellers a few weeks ago to call my bank to make sure the problem was with Leader's ATM's not my bank. The ATMs starting working before I had to use the phone but the second he found out I wasnt banking there he got this same paranoia of me where as moments before he had been friendly and curious about what was going on. Strange considering a female Latin teller had told me OK to use thier phone. So whats his problem?

Then right after that question he asked I think where I lived or something..I informed him again "I told you I travel". The black guy was trying to be fairly normal through his colleagues out of control dominance seeking. "Travel is good!" He was very nice actually.

What I cant understand is why they had to STAND there while I was sitting. As well as start harassing me. I dont think it was gang stalking honestly, becuz it didnt fit any patterns of psy ops or of tactical approach. Its more like they were UNfamiliar with me and had just profiled me as someone trying to pull a scam. However, being in banking I think with the situation I presented them, they could tell it wasnt any kind of scam, it sounded like the only scam he was trying to catch was me working which even with my other resources is not illegal or unusual.

It could be that due to the federal investigation era there is something I dont know about on my record in banking that says something about money laundering. Also I got the same weird response from Paypal at the beginning.

Go ahead, ask me anything. Give me a subpoena like you should have. But no, instead I have to be harassed for life and suffer while the real criminals have great lives and thier crooked cops friends and the super wealthy men with vices, all becuz I couldnt pay off cops asking for "donations" (maybe my family paid them, and if that's the case I dont approve. Dont give these fuckers anything, let em kill me. At least thats what they should have done). Also no one wants to ask me about who I knew or was associated with becuz then they will really have problems.

So your going to punish a woman with no money, no property and no resources for life who has no education and let society be viscous to her and drive her to suicide under the guise of law? Or some weird form of teaching someone a lesson INSTEAD of giving them a subpoena which sounds like its more thier right than being harassed into suicide? And having thier lives ruined??

Steve Fico told me one thing about all this situation: "Lets just say I think you got a raw deal". Never told me what that was exactly but I live it every day.

Seems to me its easier to ask me what happened instead of treating me constantly like a criminal yet handling me like an intimidated victim witness. Making sure I get punished without any kind of trial when I dont deserve it.

I recall once in Berkely CA some young perps were sneaking around corners watching and spying as usual. These ones were careless and I caught them out of corner of my eye. I had been counting on my fingers dead tired trying to figure out where I spent my money and on the road it never makes sense until you sit down and really look at it anyway. When this kid saw I had to count on my fingers, that my math skills were like that of a 10th grader maximum, you could see him mouth "oh come ON!".

I assume that there is some faction out there that either was just discovering I wasnt the mastermind of Julie's empire or a major drug dealer if Jake set it up to look that way. Already Jake had tried to make me look like a pedophile by bringing in the worst underage Hentai porn comics I had ever seen in his possession, which was unusual for him so I knew something was up and we must be being filmed, though I didnt want to admit it to myself. It was shocking really. Whats interesting is that when you set someone up that way, people watch the vid from the perspective of knowing the Jake position character is on thier side, in the know. What about MY perception, which was "what in the HELL is he doing with THIS in his room? This is NOT the man I knew" and dealing with that but also dealing with the subconshus knowledge of a betryal by his having this filmed as part of a set up?

They really thought they had the perfect victim. I see it all now. They knew I was mind controlled I know Jake did, as he is the one who kept pointing out how I would have conversations with my eyes open but be 'asleep' or eyes closed and not remember them, things like that.
People in the know set these things up knowing how my mind worked and how I would react. They thought they could use the mind controlled states to just steam roll over me and then I would suicide leaving them to write the ending in thier favor of course.

Either that or it was definately the black ops system that is doing further experientation. They wanted to get me on the road on the run so they could do the things they did to me like MILABs on buses and years of harassment and interigation.

What I dont understand is why these particular kids didnt realize I had a low math level. Wouldnt they have known that about me? Math and music and kept from my kind of programmed slave it seems with an iron grip from the masters if you will. Its like thier worst fear that I was curious about math and wanted to start taking classes in it. That I felt a late growth spurt in mathematics and wanted to grow. Music too. Why they fear someone like me gaining ground in these subjects I dont understand, they also need to keep my prototype away from our natural drawing and visual arts abiliites, though these are used extensively by the system when we are still useful as in photographic memory, using our memories as video or audio (spying) or using the inner Eye to visualize internal worlds of programming. Its very important while dumbing down a mc Survivor to ensure the imagination is destroyed along with high intelligence and every thing else for that matter.

Thus the statement by that bitch in Kenmore the other day with her man "You need to just get a BORING job and go to it everyday!" why does it HAVE TO BE boring?
Of course it has to be, becuz controlling a de programmed break away slave is most important to them.

Anyway aside from all the stuff no one is going to believe but I hope people DO try to understand how this all works, here is Leader Bank's site: http://leaderbank.com/annual_report.asp
Click on the annual report. Look at the owner. Hmmm, maybe they feel my Karma brought me to the place I am in life and I should be sweeping streets instead of trying to get around an oppressive system.

Recall my posts about the woman who worked for intelligence in India and how badly she was abused by the police there that she threatened suicide? Its never the older Indian men, its ALWAYS the younger people now, born here how suck really hard at knowing exactly what is right in our society. The older people are more spiritual and know how to handle life bringing unexpected things to them. I fear greatly, that without India's traditional spiriutality weaved into thier lives, that the savage is going to come out more and more. I see this in this age group here in the USA. And over there EVE TEASING is just another sign of how severe the dominance problem with Indian men can be.

India is the kind of place that needs spirituality to temper thier nature. Believe me I do know a bit. And the men have an almost primitive fear of female power that makes them react...foolishly. I have lived with Indians and seen this first hand. In one instance there is an almost childish attachment to the mother from the boys in adulthood, and this same male can become threatened by the Willfulness of a female young child.

Maybe he should have made peace with my situation by chocking it up to Karma instead of trying to play anti-terror era games and interrogate me. I should have pulled out my sandal and threatened him with 'a slippering' for a laugh but of course then I would have genuinely been in trouble.

At this point it might have been worth it. The problems normal people are encountering with the forced, rushed Diversity in the NWO is just extra pressure and burden to an already Targeted person. Its not good.

And you wonder why people snap; you better thank you gods every damn day I am a woman and the chances of me pulling a lone shooter are much smaller. Becuz the way I have been treated throughout this I have more cause than anyone I have ever known to do something that destructive. And the public knows it so what do they do, they use it as a luxury to make themselves feel bigger and better.

You are all going to pay for this someday. Pay for my life being ruined and pay for destroying society and handing it over the the Elite's house slaves and obnoxious immigrants from sexist cultures. And it wont be with an act of terrorism becuz I play to win not lose in a blaze of glory. But you WILL pay.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Been Being Badgered To The Border, Then Suddenly Deadly Peace

Its funny I have been being alerted by my Inner Guidance System, you know the one that warns TI's of trouble before hand, to get up to the border. To leave before something happens. Suddenly as if it never existed that strong, vile feeling just dropped- as of last night. I only really understood this government shutdown thing was going on as I had been really sick with stomach flu WHILE trying to take two antibiotics for two other ailments where I had become increasingly sick for weeks now- one even for the last six months! My posts and behavior was more nasty than usual from a combo of my situation, years of being targeted but also becoming that ill.

What I want to know is why is something now telling me to stay here, among friends and people who know me. I closed my bank accounts, ripped up my ID and other cards and was about to totally disassociate from being a MA resident altogether- forever. And the ideation was REALLY pressing,like doomsday or something was looming. All I kept seeing was visions of the border and the land around it- that I had to reach that. That they would put people like me in camps...it was unbelievable.

Perhaps someone somewhere knew there were plans for that to happen and perhaps as of yesterday they have planned some resolution to the govt shutdown. Perhaps its now possible through tech to terrorize the public with looming doom, then just as easily, pacify them into being calm as can be in the face of a crisis.

The people who are doing this really want the nation if not the world to have a deeply spiritual experience via torture. They have no right to do such a thing to a person, a group, a nation or the world. To cause chaos and torture in order to teach people some sort of lesson, so they will be more spiritual or behave in a certain way. Its manipulative.

I have felt for a day or so now that I am being manipulated into becoming very spiritual, once again they seem to be going for the guru thing or some sort of spiritual rebirth, etc etc. Its really disgusting.

Of course when I get into an area with no cell reception my mind goes back to normal, whats left of normal, and simply wonders why I have been wasting my time still, on nonsense and actions that dont make sense. Becuz I am under mass mind control that is why. And it seems so much more prevalent now compared to during Bush.

And the daily go to UMass flash of vision with ideation is back again. Recently it was this rush to try to leave the country and now peaceful again.

This is usually only this crazy in heavily saturated areas like Boston and Cambridge. Whats more annoying is now it seems to be about sapping any ounce of aggression I have. No warlike qualities, just me being very peaceful..maybe thats becuz I was sick and now I am better.
Again, I go back to being somewhat reasonable after midnight so I know this is falsified.

My mind and body seems to have suffered some sort of loss during taking antibiotics and then being sick with flu. I feel like part of me is dead...or like I am damaged in some part of my brain. I had a pretty rough time with the fever I had to sweat out during that flu. I actually went into delirium while breaking it which is normal for me lifelong. This time though I went through memories from RA which was ridiculous. I should have gone through that with a therapist years ago and moved on by now, not have had to be terrorized by such things while being so exhausted I had to lay down in front of the Hynes Convention T station wrapped in a sleeping bag in 80 degree weather, delirious breaking a fever. Nice. Having to go through recalling being locked in a box clawing my way out and being determined to not die that way and other unpleasantness I wont get into.

So much for False Memory Syndrome. These are things I have had compartmentalized for years and had a faint access to life long but wasnt conshus of it. Not the play by play memories like I am getting now. Like I said before there are specific memories that exist on what resembles a Rolodex...alot like the way computer programs now display album covers when you listen to music. The memory was a thumbnail and it is constantly spinning slowly in the Survivor's mind. Some of these memories are significant to tell us who we are or what kind of programming we have. Some of them are clearly suicide sequences and when its 'time to go' its as if they are clicked on, like one would click on a thumbnail on a computer to open the file. Its amazing as I now live with computers in my life and have become associated with and familiar with them how much internal programming resembles computer programs. Which of course makes it all the more likely that its old tech by now to the elite or spy craft- whatever you want to call them. And I think most Targeted Survivors of mind control programming are fully aware that the tech being used now is hidden from the public as sci fi but we can see it being used in a very practical manner nationwide.

And from what I saw in the few MILABs I was involved in, what they are using now is even more advanced. Its very old tech to them by the time its passed down to the public. Like personal computers are now. I am forty, I was programmed from 0-6 or so. That makes the way modern software common to the public nowadays, if it matches up with older internal programming of mind controlled slaves, very much old hat. I dont know if 30-40 years behind is what is the average constant difference between what the elite have and when its passed into being widely available to the public.

What I experienced is a very very fast, quick transference system of mind control and manipulation. Many of us have experienced they can read the mind, but only what is in the forefront- the 'conshus' mind. Anything buried in deeper compartments had to be gotten by manipulation of the Target, interrogation and tricking the person into revealing info. They also seem to be able to have perps intercept the TI not only in real time but to intercept the Target ON TIME, with an appropriate response or reaction, which would mean they have to have the ability to predict in time. Yes, they seem to be able to be ready for what happens in future moments in real time.

What I experienced with mind control or manipulation in St Louis was horrifying. This plan to create a hellish world of constant torture and chaos in order to gain order. That such stimuli would keep people in line, always. True I could have been dosed with something but the perps were just way to a part of this in real time. Not only can they hack the human mind, they can intercept it, guide it, terrorize it, and its very fast. Its like one of the worst acid trips to hell you have ever had...except there were actual real people there within the experience, which of course makes it all the more terrifying and humiliating.

I think that now man has entered the realm of the Internet he is going to have to face the consequences of knowing what his world is about, fully perhaps. Maybe he would have liked it better back in the days when things were hidden from him more so eh?

Lately been getting alot of ideations that my life is over, I will never have the opportunities I had when this went into high gear in early 2000's, that no one is going to believe me anyway if I write an expose etc. All the typical defeatist bullshit but its very strong now.

Slowly it seems that who I was is fading, as I have only kept that alive and havent been putting it forth into the world due to it having to be held in suspension becuz it was corrupted so badly during the attacks when vulnerable during deprogramming- and thier version of Me, the outside world's perception is taking over. The game they are playing is that if they beat down against the outside of a person and mess up the inside bad enough, the person will eventually accept the outside forces pressures to form them into what THEY want and not what is True. To alter the original shape of the person.

I am sure these sick puppies believe this MK Ultra based re formatting or creation of a person through mycotoxin exposure, torture, isolation from anything familiar or social, yet no privacy of thier own- all the cult mind controlling methods-I am sure they think they are creating a much better person. All they are doing is confusing the person and beating them down until they give in.

The subtle behavior modification and conditioning never ends here in MA. If I come to MIT to use the computers its so overt and constant its obnoxious. Nothing but CONSTANT interface and CONSTANT reward/punishment sequences. Its so ridiculous. I am totally conshus of it its a joke.

So the key to beating this system is to keep moving. It sucks and its stressful but that is the only way to beat it, that and finding areas with no cell reception. Its the only hope to getting away from the constant non stop interference and abuse. And once again I dont want to hear from any newbies about this being mental illness- I have too much connection to MK Ultra through my mother being a radiation experimentee, her parents being US Marines etc as well as mental illness doesnt function on a time schedule or according to location nor environment. So all I need to 'cure' myself is any Faraday Cage-like environment? You know where you can stick all that 'she's crazy' crap. I know damn well I was smart enough to have GONE TO MIT MYSELF...and everyone who knows what is really going on knows that was true years ago. The fact I am still functioning is testament to that. Unless of course yer like the stupid public who believe the cover stories and that I am just nuts or making this up to escape consequences etc.

Ya know there is a reason I walk around like nothing unusual happened. Becuz what happened to me as far as the really severe stuff like MILABS shouldnt be public knowledge and if it is, we are in real trouble. If the public was that smart they wouldnt be letting the economy be going this out of whack etc.
And what the public may have seen like video of me in my apartment or Jake making some stupid sex movies or something, whatever that nonense is, THAT shouldnt be public knowledge either. And if it is I personally havent seen anything I just get alot of crap from allegedly the public yet reading about spy craft from retired agents- there is a method of sicking 200 agents on ONE enemy agent in a specific area, which sounds like gang stalking (black ops) methods. So the people I encounter may just be perps trying to make it look like everyone knows or has seen something like that.

The point is that under no truly legal means could what the public saw supposedly be in existence. And if it is, I have yet to see it. So show me what everyone has supposedly seen and I will get a trace on the original posting on the Internet and I will start to sue the shit out of the cops, feds, CIA, mobsters or rich little bastards in a supposed local 'social group' who took video for survaillence and then seemingly used it to destroy my life and smear my name. Those are THE only logical choices. Why should I start being ashamed or reacting to such bullshit? Becuz by all logic, such things shouldnt exist, and if they do, then any Patriot Act legal surveillance has been thus abused and turned into the content of a cheap movie theatre with sticky seats...which of course I dont think is in the Patriot Act. Power has been abused and thus I can begin suing for so much money that I will be taken care of for the remainder of my life as well as I can open a chain of homeless hostels and destroy the industry that abused me so and piss off everyone from Liberals to Republicans in this country with a system that actually works becuz its not based on WASTE=PROFIT. Go for it. I want that shit. I want to see this video that Jake supposedly released. He makes movies, hes got to have money now. And if the cops helped him then that would be on record right?

So...really to ME, none of this exists BECUZ IT BY RIGHT AND BY LOGIC SHOULD NOT EXIST. And I have never seen any evidence of its existence. Just like I never got the respect I deserve as citizen with a subpoena from the FBI who was supposedly after me around the US to start blabbing about some Oxycontin having to do with Jake.

Actually if that is the FBI I am going to cost them money which it seems the govt doesnt have right now. As far as I know, when that gang stalker in AZ turned around and arrogantly said "I cant make it stop Rachael. You can work for us. You can travel each month and get paid every two weeks" (Which tells TI's everywhere how the perps switch gang stalking groups around..still I want to know who pays them.) I dont think that is the FBI. And the FBI should investigate them becuz obviously they are intimating they are the FBI thus impersonating them.

The key to all this is that I am supposed to be so small, so singular a person, so powerless, and so lost in a nationwide crisis (they time these things so well its incredible) at this time in our nations history that I am never supposed to be able to do anything about what they did to me. I am now and forever- 'just' a homeless woman.
And the diversions with national issues are supposed to really drive that home for me...these things are supposed to drive me into the ground once and for all.

But I have information. I have the whole story. Their biggest wish and hope is that there is so much else going on that no one listens. That its been too many years since what happened went down that it just doesnt matter now.

Yet, what happened to me is intrinsically tied into what is occurring now. Its very relevant and THAT is very much what they are afraid of. Very much so.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

MA Is Corrupt..So Is AnyWhere USA.


Most of this is hard to understand for me.

I know one thing. Being from this area its normal. I grew up with this being all very normal, this "justice on its head" sentiment.

Why focus on New England? What about the US itself? The military industrial complex? One thing I have learned in life and reading history is that most successful people became that way by doing something to exploit someone else. From privately rich individuals to corporations to America itself.

Its kind of like what Scarface says in that restaurant about people needing him as a diversion so they can continue hiding. They know how to hide is the only difference.

This perp David in Tempe AZ told me that "corruption is part of the system there(Boston)". Yeah, so what is it you are doing right now, knowing my situation and being in on gs I think back now. I exposed myself to being gang stalked by rooming in his house. Neighbors were in on it. He would say things to me like "You can learn alot about a person by thier cell phone" and brag about knowing things thanks to his being a flight attendant and shmoozing with federal marshals on flights, as if thats where he was getting this info from.

Using the federal investigation as a cover story was so damn easy for them. You wonder who is doing to MILABs..what the mob? Like they have time for that. But what do I know? Perhaps they have thier own private sector companies now, working on making the Nazi superman rooted in Project Paperclip a reality, and only the govt knows enough to stop them..or is it organized crime who knows enough to stop the govt and contractors who are corrupt??

At top levels are there even lines drawn between the two. Probably not.

Pastor James Manning Speaks Of A False Hope

...and that no one is going to stop the presidency of this historical leader.

So the rest of us also have to live in this unreality. False hope, falsehoods, and a false timeline.

Then again, this presidency might be the only one that I can get my work done finally. We'll see.

Food Crisis, Shortages, Blah Blah Blah


Alright this is ridiculous.
There is plenty of food in nature still. If need be those pigeons in the park would do or those small dogs in people's purses. Squirels, rats,mice even bugs. And thats just the city! In rural areas theres lots of food- meat and other stuff. Dont you watch those survivals shows?

And if thing got really bad enough-we'll just do what our ancestors did (especially the Neanderthal ones): eat people.

Also if you dont want more starving children like this ridiculous picture in the article DONT HAVE THEM IF YOU LIVE IN A FAMINE AREA. This is a totally alarmist article. Humans have been through some amazingly difficult situations. It also make me laugh that the alarmists are always people who dont live on the street and go hungry sometimes. Recently a working man told me that he knew the economy had hit becuz he had to sell his boat and his motorcycle.


Listen Americans are just pissed becuz they cant be RICH all the time anymore, not scared of starving. How many of these people actually know what its going to be like. Unfortunately, as we see in gang stalking, alot of The People are willing to do what it takes to survive to thier fellow human beings. So the eating people scenerio isnt that far off, becuz gs is kind of like that I guess. Those kinds of people will probably survive and we gentle people will most likely die in something like this. I think the beauty of that is that we dont give a shit.
It seems giving a shit is the deciding factor in all this. What is your PERCEPTION of terror or a crisis?

If people are so weak etc that they stop all this bs from happening to begin with then who cares what they think or do when something like this goes down? Really who cares? Becuz they are going to behave badly, they are going to do whatever they have to to survive at anyone else's expense-which is what humans do.

So I am already prepared as best I can be on my end.


Thursday, July 21, 2011

Praised Cops Got Relief From Sickness

I just experience ed something interesting. Been having horrible intermittent nausea with this stomach flu. Ans it occurred to me that it felt like that one time in AZ Tempe when I was hit by what was obviously a hand held or small mobile version of a weapon that causes nausea which I was sure of becuz the sensation came out of nowhere too strong and then disappeared when I heard the car outside drive off.

This was 2007the or so.

Lately the sensations of nausea had been similar in the intensity. And they would come in waves which didn't make sense either.

Have had hard time keeping anything down.

Just now I posted on social site to thank whichever cops helped a young friend of mine today by being very old school and stand up with her situation.

Magically the heavy come and go hashes has gone and I actually ate and keeping things down. It just disappeared. Also athe heavy mental and emotional torture been experienced lately just disappated.

I have been being targeted heavily with irrational fears etc to leave state and never return.

My entire existence has been dictated by this system.

I guess anti terrorism in this day and age means using torture to create a society united against any outside opposing forcesand that means handling whistleblowers. And in this state anyone who doesn't love or agree with authorities becuz they have seen corruption or been abused by them.

Just another bizarre true life experience that backs the MindWar theory . That we live in totally psycho civilized societies. The frightening thing is that many citizens seem to agree with what is occurring as productive to society. Public consent is one of the true dangers of this system of 'people management'.

We have to accept the fact that a good portion of the public in the USA are shills of this system and they secretly agree with this system being implemented and used to manage society.
That means we as TIs are at odds with much of society in the way it wants to run the USA as citizens.

Which means they have gone completely insane and there is no longer any commonality between us and them. We are lost TI them ans they to us.

To destroy any dissident with these recent tech advances seems to be the logical way for them. To us it seems insane to normalize torture.

Harvest Co Op Needs To Lose The Attitude..Its Not 2009 Anymore

LOSE What is up with the attitude problem I am still getting from Harvest CoOp in Cambridge? Those ghetto women who work as cashiers don't even BELONG THERE just like they uptight PC Guppies who frequent the Cafe that was bought by those awful Tribe hipsters. Aging ines at that... I am the one who lives like a hippie for X's sake at this point. That place used to be full of real local property from the old true Central SQ not this gentrified nonsense that's there now.

Not speaking to me or endearing questions nasty look on her face and playing this little game where she counts the money I give her like I am trying to rip her off.

Lemme tell you something. Most of these morons believe covet stories. If they do know the truth they are house slaves or simply working for a drinks element. This bitch with her tacky cross and flower tattoo on her right inner arm acted like I deserved to be schooled I deserve this treatment to learn some kind of lesson.

F*ck all these people. That store gained its long standing position in Central by engaging in organized stalking and harassment end of story. It was one of the places where the harassment was overt.

Imagine a bunch of supposed private citizens now have access to info andch they legally are not supposed to be able to have. And with this they can convince themselves they are righteous.

What's so amusing in all this is that these ignorant morphs with no law enforcement or spycraft training actually often base these actions on moral judgements when the people they are truly serving are far from moral. So typical.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Last night pan handling for just a few minutes this supposed farm boy from Jersey sits down next to me under the pretense of being a lost youth of his generation. He then politely gained all the info a perp would ask some of which I bullshitted and the rest I was genuine with. Why aren't u writing yer book right now? Where r u going next. He was the same age group as most perps I ever dealt with and he gained the same info. It didn't occur to me at the time becuz I have been sick with stomach flu. I never should have allowed him to sit down.

I need to get a dog that wont tolerate strangers.

This is another reason why the TI is kept isolated. So that we are so starved for human company we will talk to anyone friendly or worse allow the kind of scam baiting and space mobbing I allowed the other night. Its outrageous the other night those were recycled perps. I tricking recognized them from years ago! Its disgusting really how clever they believe they r. And they are usually these pathetic human beings as well. I have been running into these people for years on end. Its the kind of things they ask and the topics they talk about that makes them obvious.

Then again he may have just been a lost kid truly bored with his family not wanting to be in their hotel room.
Yet one thing was intriguing. I stated I may leave MA forever and he said that might ne the best decision yet. So finally they get me to leave hometown (where I could sue and rally get people into trouble) and the never return.

People also keep recently trying to get me to talk to my family again. Note the 'suggestions': talk to or go back to family again, get boring job and get up and go to it everyday etc. More trying to finalize behavior mod of the Target. Finish the story off. They are trying so hard to end this THEIR way. In the best way to suit THEIR needs.

Race Used In GS Conspiracy Oh Hell Yeah

Oh yeah! Race domination in my case is definitely part of the conspiracy. And I now realize that alot of the kids at HARVARD were in on this. Its so sad....

Becuz as I was posting that last post as well as some other stuff on a social site finishing up on a roll this rich black kid from Harvard magically appears in Park Street MBTA station and I ignore him becuz the content ans timing are to coincidental. He sits down next to me so start pulling my cords out of the sockets trying to get away quick. The
As he sat down a very dark black man who looks collegiate or professional and very African that kind of power trip not an American black. He is on my right on this bench and he is leaning into my direction in his little suit and laptop closed in his lap. He js smirking and looking right at me in an intimidating fashion. The kid from Harvard who sat to my left is still trying to get me engaged in a conversation.

The guy in the suit to my right is also looking at this kid with a smirk bit like saying they are partners. So within seconds I was surrounded by two upper class black men. I got out of there ASAP.

As I walked away just ignoring everyone involved an older white woman walked by me smirking and hanging her head to my left laughing really.

The issue isn't race exclusively. Its when the Target becomes more aware and open about their lives ansd what has happened to them. I had been posting things about race hate crimes and my own experience in Boston during bussing in the 70s.

The main point is to ensure the TI stays asleep especially not recalling or revealing what has happened to them for so many years.

It wasn't about a racial conspiracy strictly it was about losing control of the TI psychologically.

I've been very ill with stomach flu lately and taking antibiotics for other issues so at once I am much healthier and coherent than I have been in years but also feel I am facing my own mortality so perhaps leaking information.

The gs system seeks to destroy the TI while also keeping them totally silenced about what damaging info they do know.

365 Black


Gee these people look pretty different from the jerks I deal with down here in the homeless scene. And they also look very different from the rappers and other cantata tough guy personalities in media.

If this doesnt scream 'conspiracy' with the rest of what we know about gs and the NWO agenda I don't know what does.

These people have money they join organizations and lodges etc etc. I notice the media is full of black images to break down society not rep successful African American ideal identities..that seems do be done privately.

I am warning you that this is pure classier warfare as well as a sleazy ploy to utilize African Americans against others for whatever interests the Elite have in mind.

And you can't tell me many of these people aren't still bitter pissed off angry and resentful.

I have seen blacks who work in shelters outright lie to their own to protect the system and their superiors. And their own believes them. Its really sad actually.

There are so many gang members and African Americans involved in viscous brutal gang stalking that to buy into any reality that race should be honored as opposed to the individual ans his/her personal morality is an extremely dangerous brainwash that is being used to change society for the worst.
Simply to fulfill a higher agenda.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Soy In Many Foods Now, Unecessarily. Soy Shrinks The Brain

Just take note: soy is in alot of foods now and its not needed. I know they want to make money off of the soy plants however soy rises estrogen levels in humans and has been shown to lower intelligence and shrink your brain. I dont have cut and paste right now and I am tired but wanted to post this for months, keep conveniently 'forgetting'.

If you look at alot of ingredients its in crackers, all kinds of foods it never used to be in. Once a worker in Whole Foods nutritional section, who are usually very knowledgable about herbs etc, tried to lay that soy is good for you crap on me I informed her about studies showing too much causes brain shrinkage and high estrogen cant be good for males, she was stunned and changed her story real quick. They know, they know all about it.

In fact I have been disgusted with the disappearance of real health food stores and in thier place, basically YUPpie gourmet markets. Organic sugar? THE POINT IS THAT ITS SUGAR. ITS NOT NATURAL FOR HUMANS TO EAT IT AND ITS NOT HEALTHY. DUH. This is what I mean. Bread and Circus stores had fruit juice sweetened stuff, sugar was considered unhealthy. In the old days true health food stores were run by hippies that would go screaming out the door at the sight of sugar. They were small, the herbs were in quantity and cheap and you only shopped there and ate thier food if you were serious about it.

Too many comprimises have been made in the world around us. It seems we have more avialable to us yet everything is more expensive and now people are whining about the economy. Did you ever consider that the post war 60's standard of living was not meant to last forever? This punk rock sort of anti Boomer mentality is what is most hated about Gen X. Being able to survive on nothing, to make due with little and to be self sufficient. Having to listen to constant drama from Boomers growing up about how this next bad economy is going to be like the depression of the 30's just forced us to be much more adult about things becuz the adults certainly werent. They seem forever spoiled teenagers of a very prosperous era in this country and they really seem to often not understand that great standards of living like that were never meant to be permanent.

So people make excuses for thier behaviors and do things based on greed. Like gang stalking...then of course this same society is appalled by Casey Anthony's greed.

How much more bullshit can YOU stand becuz my meter is in the red and I cant take much more. Its probably the soy..its diminished my brain power. As it was supposed to probably.

Refreshing Old Fashoined Overt Oppression Reminds Us About Covert War..And Its Non Existence


Funny, here in Yankee country they simply silence you with gang stalking so that you never get to speak to begin with. I suppose this area has to preserve its appearance of protecting freedoms and rights etc.

You could just go hire a bunch of Mexican mercenaries and guns are easy enough to get there. Just tear the town away from that council real Old West style. If they don't respect your rights as an American citizen then they don't deserve the same consideration themselves. Let some Italians come down there..we will fix that situation up real quick. That town will be wiped all over with and orderly quick. Then again its a military state right? Is there a way to terrorize the council by claiming Federal Marshall law or using some fed power. Might be fun to toy with tiny town for a few.

She needs to live here for a while then move back there. Taking with her all that Boston has to teach concerning handling arrogant f*cks like that council ans those ridiculous cops.

Are those really the kind of cops you want to have access to gasses and non lethal weapons or technologies? To be tied into a national web of brothers in arms or worse national security like military, feds etc?

What you just saw is what was done to me except with all the sickness and excessive power of the northeast. And it happens all the time and cops are the guard dogs of the mansion for aholes like that. What you saw is America. Once again nobody cares..becuz they are probably watching Casey Anthony protesters bitch and moan too late about a murdered child.

That was refreshing though..to see it done overtly. This country is very grown up sophisticated in its methods of oppression which is why no one is fighting back.

When you make oppression look like life's normal breaks not to just an individual but to a nation you wont get much resistance and if u do continue to systematically ignore it..becuz remember: covert warfare DOES NOT EXIST. Therefore there is nothing wrong with the USA to fight to begin with right?


Right Offout Today..Then Somervillethis MAGees..the perps started early this morning. Right out of the squat onto the train.

First it was the guy who sits across from you that takes one look at you and moves making sure you are aware of this.

Then this Asian with two kids acts paranoid ans looks at you like a mass murderer then moves to the other side of her kids that is closest to you.

I am wearing a hippyish outfit. Just a simple solid color undress and a matching color pretty head scarf, like the black girls wear when they don't do their hair, real pretty pattern. Flowers etc.

I look totally tame. So wtf?

Its Sunday and I guess I forgot the Rule number 1: When there is not as tech or low tech managing an area the TI will inevitably get more stalking harassment ans. Psy ops from human forces.

In this diner in Somerville. Davis SQ has been a major point of hatred towards me since this began for some reason. This is where those two kids on rollerskates told me the harassment would never end and I should move to a dustbowl town in Texas. I often wonder if people in the streets looking random like that during Bush were CIA, FBI,black ops , mafia or just citizens who knew about this and thot it was funny.

To think that the streets of our country were lined with citizen spy types...across the nation. In every city every town.

The trick is for them to have people in key places and to engage the TI regularly so the Target perceives the campaign as including 'everyone' in the nation. This is one of the main motivators for lone shooters- that when they snap. Why not blow away a McDonald? Becuz inside is 'everyone' and that is who is harassing them.

The old lady who runs this diner exclaimed "well as u know i hate the goovt as you know so today we are gonna open the bar up a few minutes early". "Let's abuse them this morning".

That statement 'lets abuse THEM this morning'. Indicating either she feels THEY feel abuse her or others so its a counter action or that 'thethe govt' is her latest victim to abuse.abuse.

She couldn't look me in the eyes often enough ands I had to apay my bill right away becuz I sensed there was this holding of breath to see if I could pay.

I am beginning to wonder if The Govt' isn't the goos guys and The People allowing and working for special interests taking over and destroying the country are truly the enemy instead.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Scam Baiting and Blockng In Kenmore Sq

Was panhandling in Kenmore SQ. Making lots of money. Haven't been doing well this year last year so haven't had to deal with scam baiters. Drunk kid from this NJ sat down next to me said brother was cop other brother artist rich kid. Didn't get it til later scam baiting. Kept asking why I do this wanted to understand me etc. Conveniently two musicians came by started playing claimed to be art students. Recognized these two perhaps from HARVARD SQ but they looked real familiar. TIs espexiallly Survivors of programming get this alot.

Kind of took away from money but was amusing for moment tho something not right about it.

Then a couple came by. Said from Switzerland. That may be the case but I recognize the male of the couple by his discrinctive hair and mustache styles. I have seen him before in this and there was something very fake about the whole thing. I have traveled enough to know what a random meeting of kids is like and this wasn't it. There were alot of looks subtle but something was going on.

The spot was now totally blown up. A wheelchair came by. I commented to original drink kid that I if it weren't for this situation I would be helping people like that get better care. He seemed surprised by the way that I spoke to that man and exclaimed "but yer nice". Why wuz he think otherwise?

At least one of the music kids told me that this predicament is society's fault becuz this country has become greedy and expensive.

This experience as well as the way I was treated in Harvard. These are rich kids in on this who don't understand poor people to begin with and probably were told by an insurance e company foe Olnick or the cops or Petrifying that I scammed the money for that moldy apartment and every other smear possible.

They might genuinely be that stupid and naive. They market the smear against the TI to people who are clueless. If that wasn't the case then wtf is wrong with people?

I then moved to the left of MCdonalds door only to have a large group of very skinny small rich kids gather there and block me again. They were there way too long and also one of them came out of McDonalnds saying on their cell phone "something something that Rachel girl" so unless one of them is named Rachel its purposeful scam blocking. They also dispersed very quickly when I pulled video camera on phone out and their facial expressions and smiling about it told me my suspicions were correct.

If you look at past posts for this area you will note that this is the mode of operation or style of this location and a definitive pattern has been formed over many years time showing the same tactics are used in Kenmore repeatedly.

Earlier an older couple came by told me I looked healthy enough to get up and have a life. Told her as she walked away "welcome to gang stalking . Have a nice night". She replied with "yeah right" which indicates she knows what gs is to begin with..a good indication of a perp.

She came by again with this guy. She was older and he looked blonde and a cali beach type but older. They both came ip real close and of course stayed standing while I sat. She said I was bullshitting. I said read my blog. Simply that I had one. She then replied that "you have this blog where you talk about yourself" and I asked "so your familiar with my blog?" She had to think fast and control her answer very carefully. She claimed that she knows it. She knows the type of situation and had relatives who died becuz of living this way (another veiled threat). She then told me I had a beautiful face a beautiful haircut look at my nice gear. She then stated that I shouldn't be taking money from people who are working.

The most insulting part of this was "Get a boring job, get up and go to it everyday" and don't beg. Don't take money from people who are working. The purpose of all this was to make me feel extremely like a fraud.

All of this is more brainwashing bulshit. Many of these people are BU students or other people with wealth coming out the yin yang and also people who can't give-DONT its that simple.

I get this treatment yet the old drunk Joe is still out here and that crackhead lesbian girl every day.

Let's think logically for a moment. I am a political prisoner. My life is ruined and my health recently became so bad it was a threat to my very life due to gang stalking.g over many years time.
I don't drink or smoke or do hard drugs or buy drugs and do nothing but work my ass off constantly on this project.

Yet I get all these diversions and speeches..so the drunk and crackhead need the money MORE?

Get a boring job was the absolute last straw. I shouldn't have to do things I don't want to do for money especially since they prevented me from going to UMass to be a councilor and doing what I wanted to begin with.
Which h leads us to earlier where some nut job this morning sat down next to me in Central SQ Cambridge told me On The Rise has some creepy shit going on there then proceeded to tell me I should 'get some dates' with men to make money. She then told me it'd ok for a sex worker to work even with Hep C. She then told me that I got liver disesse becuz I didn't believe in God when I contracted liver disease years ago. A religious hooker? Is anyone sane in this or what? Where do they get these people?

There is a major difference between someone with various types of programming so that part of them is a sex worker alter ego and another part might contain Template or Satanic programming etc. A godly prostitute who is fully conshus of what she is doing is insane to me.

No matter what you do say or who you send my course will not be altered.

Anyone who thinks I am bullshitting or deserves this is really stupid or a perp.

By the way the old drunk Joe and the crash head deserve more respect becuz they may have been in on this years ago but now even THEY feel bad its still going on and at least Joe admitted "it never should have happened to begin with" and someone else added something about the cops being behind it before he later switched up and claimed "gang stalking doesn't exist".

Hmph..how easy is this once you become ace at it? Key: they never change, the TI evolves.

Friday, July 15, 2011

Meltdowns Becoming Too Frequent

Doing laundry and this little twit freaked out on me. with my stress levels and with a history of being tormented for years I just couldn't take it. I screamed at her and really wanted to just punch her out. Real brat and an idiot. typical foreigners taking all the small business opportunities from locals and then charging the poor outrageous prices.

I bet the peeps send some a-hole on their payroll to see if the video footage can be used against me. Then they see that she freaked out and threatened to call the police becuz she thought I didn't pull a blanket from a washer fast enough. if her going to leave your handicapped daughter in charge make sure she isn't too handicapped mentally and emotionally to do her job. I bet in this politically correct he'll I was supposed to kiss ass. not happening. told her off. left. Locals agreed she was a brat when I was leaving calling her a brat.

They must be annoyed they can't use it like all the other miles of footage they have to prove I am a psycho.

That bitch mother of mine will go to any lengths to try and make me out to be mental instead of her being a six foot abusive ogre when I was little then Julies bullshit and the business then I try to get my life together and for my troubles I get tortured for years on end becuz these scumbags running this country into the ground want to make terrorists to legitimize their MIC (military industry complex) and security bs and get rid of a victim witness at the same time.

I dare someone to pick me up for screaming at that little bitch today. I want you to try so I can spill the beans on everyone who screwed me over.

MA is dead and needs to be left for dead. And this place is going to pay for what ifs done to my nerves and my life.

I need to go somewhere where I am absolutely sure my mother and her family aren't working with authorities.

that stalker crap she used to do "I always knew where u were". the cops are probably still letting her in on this. they need her testimony to make me look nuts. and she used to threaten me years ago 'dont rock the boat' 'dont mess with our family ' and becuz she's an overblown fat drama queen she always tried to sound mafia by saying THE family. Wonder why I pretend to know less than I do? becuz I grew up with an overbearing asshole who always pretended she was more than she really was. I enjoy not letting people know everything or bragging. Its an absolutely disgusting trait.

had to drag my laundry all the way to Central SQ. why are prices LOWER in between the most gov't funded school in the USA and the school that gets the biggest endowment in the entire world compared to a laundeymat across the street from Southie projects? Becuz MA is all about oppressing poor people. Using Diversity race PC and immigrants from shitty third world countries are very popular manipulation tactics nowadays.

This state needs to fall into the ocean and take Harvard MIT and Raytheon with it. Don't forget Brookline please..after their part in this nothing is to horrible for that place. And destroy Newton and Watertown. Carnage, declaration. If only...

I hope my family realizes they are never going to see me again. Even if I ace this they are dead to me end of story. They chose their side and its unforgivable. I love their using my perfect blond religious cousin as a front to rep the family. It took my uncle years of careful planning and deception, lying and hiding the truth to built her into the Great White Wash she is. Lol :Operation Kristen Noel Front.

its funny that one of the workers at ABCD said she wouldn't report crazy crackhead Rachel across the hall in my old apartment (of Rachel and Henry fame) becuz "I don't want to deny someone else housing" yet I get denied decent housing, I get denied a life so everyone else can have one.

The American public are not the total victims of mind control you think they are. A portion are but many go along with these things willingly. I saw many people do so during the feeding frenzy under Bush. People knew it was wrong. A nurse at the Marino Center even said "What's being done to you is wrong". Alot of the USA went along with destroying my life.

This country is run by people who are indeed as evil as everyone who hates us says it is. I have seen a unified systematic effort by multitudes of people across tue USA to simply destroy my life and watch me die. That is the USA for you. And they only assists me and kept me alive to see if I could be behavior modified.

This older security guard at Kmart in Somerville MA messed with me when I went a few days ago. He kept looking up at the security cameras then pointing at me and then to the camera again making this gesture pointing at the wedding ring finger. old white guy.

it was disgusting really. They think that they can push me into giving up and settling down as a means of surrender. See how sexist this is?

The black guy who works in 7-11 in Central SQ Cambridge in the mornings knows all about gang stalking. When I first arrived back a means year ago he tried to get tabbies from this all African Cambridge cab company to mess with me, in the same styles as when I left but I had evolved beyond it so they gave up eventually.

He's played games with me twice. Once mentioning there was video footage of me being across and pulling a tiny knife on someone in Central and a month or so ago when I came into the store he said 'i saw you do that. I saw you do (a gesturing tactic used to condition TIs in gs). Then you smiled at me". Then he said he was only kidding with me yet the mind f*ck was clear: I know her being messed with and I am pulling a power trip by drawing attention to it with you.

The peeps can easily be lulled into a false sense of security and if they believe you are submitting and accepting your situation they may even see you as likable.

Too bad for them becuz they are still your mortal enemy and never should have been triggering all this war programming by doing this shit to begin with. Keep documenting what they do. And if you can destroy any of them that are obviously guilty at any time do so..either now or later. Never submit to this system or the NWO.

The people who go along with this are total scumbags. Losers. Jealous average nobodies who's only chance at being special is to destroy talented people or someone attractive or mob. someone represented as less than. many people actually believe the Target is not as high quality as they should be so they get involved in gs like genociding Jews.

For example one wonders why that bitch Amie Mann would want to get up in this when it isn't her business, have my ex do her video, write an album title it '#$&% smilers' like perps smirking or smiling which was so common during Bush and write a song like Ballentines so close to my story. Its obvious: she's a fucking snob who doesn't realize the 80s is over.
She then later shows her most likely motive for such actions by Twittering that Ice T isn't good enough to be an actor.
Many many people in on this have made it obvious that they believe certain classes of people are simply not 'good enough'. At MIT the rich bitches make sure they sing in perfect voices and rub it in, becuz I liked to amuse myself that way. The message is that you aren't talented ENOUGH. I notice though that no one ever challenged my drawing abilities.

Of course these are all tactics as part of a psy ops campaign. And a huge part of that is to make the TI feel like what talents they do have are worthless.

This campaign has gone very far in destroying my life and torturing me nearly to death.

Usually it never stops until the Target dies but one can tell the whole world how it works before you go.

I am surprised that so many seemingly normal people are into assisting with torture but that is the reality of the times we live with in. Tech has simply made torturing someone to death easier.

Its also given the Target a way of fighting back.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

The Public Knows About Mind Control Slavery..As Much As They Could Know

I've heard perps before talking about women who were 'raised very submissive' by their families within the gs context or reality.

Much of the public knows about mind control especially handling people in the adult entertainment industry and children.

Many people want this system in place you have to understand that..AND they really do believe they are above Survivors of these mind control families.

They may not be smart enough to know the ins and outs of programming but they know that women from these families are controlled and exploited and they would like to keep it that way. What shocks me are the women involved.

The reality is that whoever isn't a pervert a pedo or a John is in need of some form of reward or payment for gang stalking.

Many people will do anything to anyone else to keep what they have. In doing this they somehow get the idea that they are superior to the Targeted Individual. They are living off of whatever rationalization they can find and being apes basically. Aggressive warlike greedy and territorial. They aren't really human at all.

So really many TIs are very superior to all gang stalkers the only thing that makes that unclear is the 'mob rules' factor and most people only viewing the TI as a source of revenue not as a human being.
Was crashing in Newton. Left today. Still alot of harassme.t in Newton and Watertown. Waltham cops of course considering they have to cover for my familys part in this. My mothers cousin in on the force here so they think they can do whatever they want and she was prob smart enough to make a 'donation'. The cops used to try to extort money out of me that way in Brighton. They must have thought I had money. I even gave them twenty five dollars when I really didn't have any money and they still kept calling and sending mail to ask for donations to, some police fund.

Why they weren't smart enough to realize I was dirty poor I will never understand.

The whole world will be able to see how disgusting MA is instead of them hiding behinnd the colleges and childrns hospital.

More Self Serving Perps or Simply Very Rude New Friends And Aquantances

I don't trust the people I am with and I don't trust the people who brought me here. I am staying at someones apartment and they were alot less noisy when I had two other travelers here with me. The woman who hosted us basically has drained me all day long.of energy by having non stop stress in this apartment and I am wondering if it was on purpose. There were little things she was doing.that would indicate this is all played out for effect.

She also claims to be moving soon so I can imagine she may do.something like this to.get a better place. Waltham and Newton are key in my gs, much of the communities being involved so her situation involving those two housing authorities I.don't.know if I trust. These are kind of unsavory people...and she.seems.like a con a bit anyway.

I like the people who broaught me here but I have reason to mistrust them too. I could swear that one of the girls was in a tent in HARVARD with one of.the guys there who came out of the tent, saw me and then started doing a coughing tactic after going back in the tent. I know I heard a voice I.thought was hers say "...so its everyone, as long as you don't get caught?". I was sure it was her becuz she used an expression while speaking that is exclusive to the way she speaks only. Yet the next morning she claimed it wasn't her in that tent and typically that guy that started the coughing tactic has a differs.t girl in his tent and she kinda sounds like that other girl who is part of the couple who brought me here. She could have used the same expression in conversation.

That couple just left to try to get into a nice situation and get off the street and I also wonder if they r not going to get off the street largely becuz they helped this system.

Getting better opportunity than would usually be available to you is a very common reward for assisting.this system and its easy to make it look like simply good luck just like gs is made to seem like simply bad luck.

And its been very easy to fool me in this location becuz I notice alot more occurs to me after midnight. As if that is a condition now induced by remote influence: not being able to assess threats clearly, naivete.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Tyra Banks Horrid Counseling Talk Show

Tura Banks has no children and she has all these moms and kids on. Tura has no.kids and she's trying to council mothers which is totally wrong.

Also all the moms are black except one Latin one. The mom one light skinned tblonde blonde and white.

Tura is basically acting like its black girls against this horrid white mom when Tyra doesn't even have any kids and didn't have to deal with being a mom at 16.

These sneaky race games are getting tiresome and you wonder why reactionary racisms is on the rise world wide. Its going to continue becuz as Bob Market said "You can fool some of the people some of the time but you can't fool all the people all of the time".

Now Tyra is basically telling this white mom to have more soul when dealing with her black child.

WHAT TYRA DESERVES IS TO HAVE THIS MOM DUMP THE KID IN HER LAP AND SAY 'good you deal with her. You race her. You go back in time and give up your modeling career at 16 to be a mom'.

These race manipulations to cover up classism are going to keep being exposed for the SOCISL CONTROL AND DIVERSIONARY purposes they serve until someone else sees it and like many of us vets tired of the bullshit.

There is alot more going on in this world right now. This 90s type of nonsense focusing on human petty dramas is something we can no longer afford.

Its manipulative and its purpose is purely to opiate and control the masses with a false sense of 'feel good' or resolved conflict where nothing could be further from the truth right now in our society.

Even this is a diversion from what has gone on over the last decade.

And you still can't fool all of the people all of the time..which of course is why you then simply target those people..lol.

Monday, July 11, 2011

Why Does My Ex Jake Keep Coming Up As The Key?

Was looking at map on phone of Newton. Looked at train stop near my ex old house when he lived with his family.

It made me feel sad to revisit this old place. Like this is what my life looked like before it ended.

For some reason in all of this my ex Jake figures prominently. Even though I was targeted in an obvious manner in 95 before I met him and can even recall such similar behavior occuring when I was a little kid and my mother being messed with as well...I get this feeling alot of the time that Jake figures into my life really ending as I knew it more than I realize.

As if even outside of Bush coming into office, Julie wanting to play clean up and cut old loose ends and move up in the world and my mother wanting to make sure I never recalled memories and her covering for family dirt and even Olnick and the Pettittis trying to cover for that moldy apartment-outside of the various people around me that all had motive to be part of destroying me and discrediting my testimony ..there is something about Jakes involvment that is much more compelling than the other parties involved.

As if he alone was capable of ripping my life from me more than anyone else, even though he knew me the least amount of time, other than the Pettitis who were working off of a purely business motivation..well that and how personally f*cked up they were as people. It wasn't personal per se becuz they didn't really know me.

Why does Jake figure so prominently in all this?

How Do I Deserve This?

I genuinely don't understand why people think I deserve this. Its like I am being punished simply for having no money. My mother had crooked lawsuits Jake was dealing drugs laundering alot of it through his band and doing free graphic design for other bands (by ripping off the copy shop he worked for) and Julia is a sleazy career criminal..a drunk one at that. So how the hell do I deserve.this? Why does everyone think that?

Why did that little Jewish young kid skip by me in 2009 on his way to a posh party at that snooty hotel in Kenmore saying "ha ha..you deserved it!". I don't get it. A punishment makes little impact if the person doesn't know what they did. Its a senseless beating and that's exactly what gang stalking of this nature is.

Why did I have people like Benny at On The Rise say in a casual slightly smug attitude with a sigh "well, that's what happens when you experience severe trauma". It was shocking but you don't expect it so you deny you really heard such a thing. The advocates at these day drop in shelters know about gs at least I am sure the ones at OTR know. However its inconsistent. Jenn will sit there and admit to it by saying yes Christine shouldn't constantly talk about gs becuz it triggers people yet Susan will sit there and act as if there's a point where she can't believe it goes on and how does one know the difference between true insanity and being targeted.

None of these peoples reactions make sense. They are inconsistent and more disturbing they are heartless. That statement from Bennie blew my mind. This younger generation are scary sometimes. Their ability to accept cruelty and seem desensitized to it is absolutely frightening.
Its like they aren't grounded.

I admit I was selfish when I was in my 20s. But u could tell I was. I didn't go around pretending to be normal or 'good' etc.

Nothing could validate the things I have lived through. Even the most hardcore criminal deserves the chair compared to this.

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Oh I get it now. Nobody believes the claims of my having been disassociative and being able to live through an alter ego perhaps becuz that is what hardened criminals and serial killers pull when they get caught.

Well I never got caught doing anything. In fact I would have much preferred legal action like disturbing the peace, an eviction and one other charge. That would have been straightforward. So if someone like me is so guilty then why were charges as such never filed?

The only people who lie are all the greedy rich connected criminals in all this as well as whoever harassed my mother out of going to the Pres Advisory Committee in 95. My mother thinks she's some sort of player becuz she played games and sold me out. How can that be if her original intent in 95 was to do the right thing and advocate for herself through proper channels? She's been intimidated into serving the agenda opposed to her original course of action. Players original course of action would have been criminal minded to begin with. She never would have been naive enough to play it straight to begin with. All these scuzzy cops and other people involved who like to be in on such abuse of one's child think she's so evil and badass. She's mind controlled and isn't strong enough to tell the system to f*ck off. Thats not a player. If she was a player I would not be walking around or walking around freely.

Either that or subconshusly she notched her role in this to give me opportunity to see what was really going on, which means there was still some remnance of good in there somewhere. This system destroys people and their families. And I will get them for that too. Why should I have had no real mother or father? Tue State thinks its my keeper is the deal.

Yeah I don't lie. I don't have to...I may withold information till later but since this system seems to think exposure is their best win I simply use the whole truth to counter their attempts to use facts or info out of context selectively in combo with smear.

Look at the motives. Who has more to loose? I certainly don't.

The low level people in on this are total weakling scum and I want their heads more than the higher ups. They only focus on my weaknesses or what I have lost or lack. No respect at all for years of fight or remaining sane or positive.

Sucks to be less than average doesn't it? And have no discipline or be a slave to others. These are the sorts of people that really gloat in the Target's difficult position.

Conditioning the TI To Not Seek Medical Care Leads To Untracable Health Deterioration, Death

People know my mother is sue happy. That shes had some bogus lawsuits. And she.has sued many times.

I've never sued anyone and ironically when I did I got harassed and screwed out of justice. And people in on this KNOW that apartment screwed me up for life. One person actually said that very sentence "But it screwed you up for life". These types of statements are made by people usually that are perps or people in on the harassment that are doing something to the TI that gets them favors from the gs system. If they really cared they would discuss the issue with the Target and be more genuine with them. Its unfair to throw info like that at a person who isn't sure what other people know or don't know.

My biggest fear with the healthcare negligence and the harassment like that recently at Mt Auburn hospital is that they are trying to get my health so downgraded that one day I just keel over and there is no readable record as leading up to that.

Thus at Mt Auburn if they give me care but are sneaky about making sure nothing was documented, then there is no further record of my allergic reaction condition continuing to be problematic. And if I am harassed enough constantly by medical staff I will be conditioned to not seek care and thus my health will worsen...its just another one of their fascist oppressive games they play.

Something tells me the time is now.
I keep forgetting that one of the reasons they don't want me really get healthcare being aware of my mothers status as a.radiation experimentee is that her and I are going to experience more health issues or specific health issues as.opposed to normal people. For instance she now has alot of thyroid problems the norm for radiation experimentees. Her and I were the only two women in our families to have endometriosis and mine was always chronic and.severe and I had the condition only one year after my first period.

Realize Must Be More Security Conshus

I was so sleep deprived but couldn't keep up with it. Last two days force fed myself sleep, day sleep is especially needed.

I also realized that due to my compartmentalizing and living through a sort of self created front alter for sanity I wasn't able to control my outlook in that alter. The Traveler would do stupid things like hang around Harvard and MIT . I didn't want to realize that in my situation that is not acceptable security wise.

I have spent two days away from there and generally feel much better I ever did near there. Its now easy to say with confidence that those two schools in some capacity are still involved in human experimentation connected to MK Ultra o at least mind control and behavior modification. MIT is definately involved with black projects.

I can never go to Cambridge again for life probably.

I now realize to stay away from all military base areas and schools like MIT or Harvard with any track record of being involved in black projects.

Thats why I got treated so badly at Mt Auburn hospital Watertown Cambridge line. Had big sign on it said teaching hospital of Harvard. So anywhere in Boston I am not going to get quality care and will be gang stalked becuz of their affiliations with Harvard etc. Its hard to accept but Harvard is very evil. I had even experienced sick harassment years ago from the kids who work at the shelter in the winter it was around 2009 or before I believe.

MA in general might be off limits but it seems downtown Boston in a.small area here is ok. Like nobody here gives a shit about gs me. Park St station was rough at one time but that has stopped. Maybe they just have other interests in mind and don't need to gs me. Like nothing is at stake for them.

So now at least I realize I have to think like gang stalked Rachael even when I would like to forget all about this and try to have a normal life.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Refuge From The Burning/Misuse of Sun Symbology

I'm in the Copley Library Boston which is usually one of my favorite places most likely due to the Templar content within such as the artwork as well as the structure and placement or the building itself.

I am detached from it. Whatever that Bactrim did by inducing allergies to so many things the supression of my system I feel has made me non existent. What I am describing is that when I DO have a reaction to something my body and senses feel alive again. My usual state now is that of my system feeling suppressed...its been like this since Dec 09 when I was given that Bactrim and had a severe multi symtom allergic reaction.

Strangely this is one of the few places I can think straight and remember. Outside of little areas like this which are refuges, the Satanic Age has completely taken over.

I don't think people who feel and believe as I do are going to win this one. I think its been predetermined that this age is as it is and any content from the ancient Sun cults (Templars, Masonic, Rosicrucian) that don't serve the new agenda are being phased out permanently.

What's so odd about this is that Jesus and Christianity are just fine and the Catholic Church has a new Pope and has started campaigns to get Catholics to come back to the church.

Its all things sacred like what made the Mona Lisa or what made this what it still is today, this room with warm wood and illuminated lights with marble floor and a story of the Grail along the walls painted across the room. This room.is absolutely solid, its warm and its 'magick' does not cease to be.

Ill bet if this wasn't protected by wealthy patrons for its historical value they'd have built a Starbucks in here by now.

It makes me want to vomit.

This room is safe cozy warm and homey. It also feels like it heals temporarily some of the 'burning' that has been done to me and I can still feel on my insides daily.

Burning experienced from contact with perps themselves or from long term exposure to gang stalking for years on end. The constant interface the constant deceptions...the disrespect, the callousness, the apathy.
Even simply walking outside one can feel it. As that sort of sensation.

But not in here. Its safe here.

Its no surprise that the modern powers that be want to destroy any and all Templar content of this type.

Which is also the purpose of the Illuminati nonsense in music and entertainment. To use Masonic or Sun Cult symbolism for evil ends opposed to positive ones where the public will then percieve that all Sun symbology is for negative ends, thus ignoring or not seeing the destruction of the good.