“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” --Maya Angelou

Sunday, December 28, 2014

754 vk8 red car. Skinny guy. Likes to motion homeless women panhandling to ccome to drivers side then shuts window.

Grey small suv got nervous across street as my reaction was to calmly walk back around car then pull out smart phone to put his punk ass on front street.

Saturday, December 20, 2014

Boston Cambridge Area Hit With Heavier Remote Influence Than Previous Years

Not doing too well in this area. I stayed for a year which Ive never done before-through last winter. Im starting to look my age. After Fukushima I aged about 5 years anyway but the lack of the same structure I had before is making it very hard to survive.

I had an abortion last year in which OHSU screwed up my womb badly and I cant get any Harvard affiliated docs to admit to it and its obvious Im being handled. I recently found out OHSU is a research hospital but its state run not a teaching hospital in the way I understood them here in Boston- affiliated with private Ivy League colleges. THe daily lower back pain caused by that first hemorrhage like bleeding, that incapacitated me for a month so I couldnt leave Portland, OR had never left completely and its just another daily obstacle. TIs acquire all kinds of health damages due to being forced into living situations they would not normally be in or states of mind we have to endure due to being targeted, sleep deprived etc.

The people who are behind this system know damn well its a long term destruction of the persons health and sanity. That is thier goal.

OHSU is getting sued all the time. They dont have as much accountability due to being a state institution. It was one of the biggest mistakes I ever made. I should have come home and had it done.

Getting many months of exposure of radiation on the west coast was also very stupid especially Portland OR.

I meet this man last year and for some reason I got stuck here after he went to jail. I still have no idea what I was thinking. I was sick from radiation exposure in the months before. I spent the winter just healing what felt like exposure that was in the very marrow of my bones. Its very bad in the northwest.

So I stayed here all year. I spent my summer trying to get out of the USA via Nova Scotia and due to gang stalking I only made it to the border of Canada, Machias Maine.
SO I still havent left the northeast all this time. Ive been in the northwest and northeast since June of 2013. No desert, no midwest, no TX. That isnt good.

Going to the Southwestern USA had kept my health preserved and even healed me due to the dry conditions improving everything from my mold exposure in early 2000s to some respiratory conditions due to mold exposure and just the fact the northeast is polluted with alot of mold.

Slowly conditions here in my hometown Ive been stuck in have deteriorated for houseless people. The attempted no camping in Cambridge, the new anti homeless sentiment. Alot due to the new administrations in Cambridge and Boston. When Menino died some things improved (like some sort of control that was over me) but I also feel alot less protected now and perps are doing things they didnt do since Bush. Also homeless people got some help from Menino as long as he was alive.

Then being forced to finally act out, getting arrested, probation, bringing an unnatural fear to me which has been hindering. Very limiting. I know damn well that I will be f*cked with so hard in jail by people working for the GS system that it wont end well...that and the fact that jails here are so mouldy I would acquire more damage to my system than I can afford. It took me years to repair the neurological damage done by that mouldy apartment and I did so by travelling to very dry hot areas every year. Also on the road I dont eat as many sweets which I now cannot stop doing its my second winter here. This is exactly what happens to my mother in this environment and its not going to happen to me. Overweight, depressed, asthma plus who knows what neuro damage has been done, my grandmother's basement floods every year. No one is going to make me get more mold exposure. More agonizing headaches, more rhinitis, more brain damage. In 2006 I left this area to go to AZ to get healthy and I was walking with an unsteady gait, thats how bad the nuero damage was. I was paying out of my pocket to get vitamin iv's at the Merino Center every week. While still being forced to go back into the mouldy apartment.
I had discussions about brain damage with an older man who had an aneurism. We both experienced the weird experience of perceiving a memory from just yesterday as if it was 10 years ago. This is why I go to the desert and travel and sleep outside. Not always healthiest and yes, leads to other health problems but it assists in repairing brain damage. Meeting new people and seeing new things constantly also improved my condition as well as repaired memory loss.

This area has always wanted to destroy me the way they have my mother. Dont f*ckin think so.

My eyesight has started deteriorating this year which I firmly believe is from not going to dry out in the west.

Another thing I am experiencing is that I have systematically alienated the companion I am with. Its so murky here now with electromag/radiation soup it seems that its hard to tell if I should have even been with him at all.

There is something different about the way this area is being targeted. Its a much heavier influence than I remember. On Saturdays then Sundays or holidays-'clear' days from whatever the remote influence is over the area (and that is across the USA) this area clears up to a state that I recall it was last year before the new administration. I feel it every Saturday. I am clearer headed, I can make a decision I can remember things better.

Its not just memory loss its forgetting what your long term plans were or forgetting your actual motivations. Its so heavy its....feels almost deadly over time. Forgetting who you are even.

I got disgusted with the homeless womens drop ins which seem to be in on this genocide of TIs and homeless people as much as the surrounding communities. Before it was just gang stalking now they are moving their people out with a quickness, to new jobs and locations then making these places look improved and implementing policies that actually limit a damaged TI especially someone who experienced alot of abuse of power in the place. The Womens Lunch Place is a perfect example of this. They’ve been very slick about cleaning up thier act but making it so anyone they abused before is going to be unable to get anything out of the new environment. Its a total white wash.

The workers in these places all within the last year have left magickally all at the same time to go on to other jobs. After being around for 10 years through the thick of the war and the harassment campaigns. ASSHOLES. Nurse Pat is one of them. She helps the average homeless but helps perp the targeted whistle-blowers and activists-the TIS. This is very common in the homeless industry.

The WOmen's Center is now just the way they wanted it-just for groups so local women can do activism. Hmph. Sucks I had to go there every day in winter and get fried the shit out of and messed with by the housed women that went to drum circles and such. Now they just take it back by setting up some sort of violence from a client (by hiring a director that was totally going to cause that. She looks and acts like one of the Bush daughters. Not exactly the kind of person that fits in there. Wish it would have happened sooner so I woouldnt have depended on the place all these years.

Theres no scene left or sense of family in Harvard

Due to all the other issues making it hard for me to function as I did as a houseless activist Im slowly becoming dependent on someone who isnt dependable or totally sensitive to my hurts and wounds. Hes the kind where you would have to be already damaged for him to understand how severe something is. I cant afford that.

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Heaviness In Chest Unable To Breathe-Reflux Or Perps Returning To Bush Heydays Using Poisonings?

I've had heaviness in chest and trouble breathing. Found white powder on clothes last night when came back from restroom at Mass Art. Sprayed clothes and all gear and companions gear im now using with cleansing spray. Symptoms declined. Heaviness chest decreased, memory functioned better, heart felt healthier.

Heaviness in center of chest was causing depression that was becoming crushing. Confusion, doom and gloom, defeatedness and a lot of symptoms i saw my grandfather experience with heart disease and after heart surgeries. Taxing the heart like that causes childlike behavior, crying and crushing depression.

Its been clinically proven that 'broken heartedness' in humans is due to actual changes in our heart organ due to changes in our emotional and/or spiritual states.

Been very messed up lately. And not doing well in Boston area.

It seems paranoid but the people involved in this system have depended on poisons and dosings for years. It was worse during Bush and early Obama.
I have one awful memory I can recall of Chinese working at Dunkin Donuts in Chinatown in Boston putting a white powder in to my coffee. This was early on after my gang stalking campaign went 24/7, in 2006 perhaps when I began my years of chronic homelessness by staying in shelters in Boston like Pine St Inn.
I had not been introduced to gang stalking activism yet on the internet but I knew I was being treated very badly like this sort of thing, gas from the stove being turned on in my Brighton apartment when I wasnt home, being stalked and harassed by marked police cars etc.

It wouldnt surprise me if that was tried again as a tactic. Since Ive been on probation the main content of the harassment campaigns seems to be to make me snap so that I get put into an institution but also to force me to give up my continued attempts at finishing my project. My being discredited in this area seems to be complete and to the satisfaction of the community. Trying to once again make me nuts with druggings doesnt surprise me. Making me react as I did to get arrested is basically what they did in that McDonalds anyway.

Monday, December 8, 2014

Being Harassed In Brighton Again/Black Males As Mate Theme Being Used Again

11:52 PM

Being harassed once again in McDonald's on Western Ave, Brighton, MA this morning.
Black foriegn male in hallway near door standing there staring. He had no food with him but i was at a table with food still in front of me.

A large black male seemingly mentally ill not buying anything also came in staring and focusing on me. Foreign blacks males were used heavily here this morning and they were coming in and out all making it obvious I was a Target.

My backpack is small now as I'm inside temporarily. I dont appear 'homeless'. When i complained to the Latina manager she said he was a customer from earlier this morning. (?)
Usually people loitering get kicked out of a restaurant especially nowadays.

The way she handled it was unprofessional and told him i was afraid of him standing in the doorway which i corrected. She then informed me i could leave too and that i dont need to be there at the table w my food that long.

Ive encounteted multiple instances of MALES of all races loitering undisturbed in this restaurant throughout the day.

If thats what they want to allow its fine but dont f*ck with me because i pointed out someone being a creeper.

After she walked away the black foriegn male proceeded predictablty to try to agitate me into an altercation which is 50% of the gang stalking now in this area as obviously they want me to break probation and get put away. The other half is non stop harassment from blacks mostly males to keep up my reactionary racism as self defense as this would be documented on security cams as well as by witnesses.

His first insult was some broken English comment about my being a US citizen and white yet Im homeless...which is odd because like i just wrote i dont look 'homeless' right now.

It was probably a set up and I've posted before that the all South American staff here have had some employees that have done overt harassement in the past.

I simply responded with my standard one liner telling him to go back where he came from and starve to death if he doesn't like poor or any other kind of American citizens. Being African I usually add something at the end referring to the constant take over of their governments by rebels. Chinese get a reference to organ harvesting and their government's horrible human rights record, Indians are told to take a long swim in the Ganges with some dead bodies and I have others as the ending second line for many countries..to remind them why they probably left in the first place..after the first standard line of course.

This is all psy warfare counter measures. Because obviously this administration loves to use class war and create racist, white supremacist lone shooters-and if Im wrong and they aren't perps but random assh*les, these zingers work.

No one expects this type of response in an white Liberal area.

When this was occuring there were two stocky, white males sitting in the seats just at the edge of the main dining area and where i was sitting-the back dining area.
They were dressed in some clothing one would see men who had been in the military wearing but they also could have been sportsmen. Hunting or something. Shady guys.

I went and talked to the manager and said she shud understand about creeps she's a woman. She agreed but working that angle seemed to shake up the two shady white males and as i walked past i could plainly tell they were effected by my statement and utilizing bonding between females.

Remember theres ALOT of sick, bitter men involved in these campaigns. Personal motivations always help to ensure perps go after Targets with malice and effectively.

Alot of these morons also are living out fantasies by actually treating gang stalking a female Target like an organized hunt.

(During.this I was being hit with remote influence as follows):
Im being hit once again with tactics designed to push me into ending up with a black male. It's as if my companion is percieved as a spring board or stepping stone to this end result by the gang stalking system.

I can't allow this. Ive worked to hard to give into coercion and they trying to get me into a slave culture.
Having white males reject me and be weaklings in their own identity is part of the brainwash to force me into being with a black male.

Everyone is so brainwashed with PC its hard to find people who are awake who understand these are cult mind control programs as part of the NWO plan for world wide enslavement of humanity.
They haven't seen what TIs have, that blacks and foriegn blacks are heavily involved in harassment of Targets, that the continued unethical human experimentation has many African Americans involved.

Black ghettos existing in the 21st century is the greatest cover that educated, high level placed, sophisticated blacks have going for them. No one believes they are capable of being involved in such war crimes. They only see them as victims not part of the oppression.

They havent studied up on COINTELPRO and realized those agents were simply reassigned not retired. And it's easy to assume their children and families continue.

4:32 pm
(IMPORTANT: This may assist other Targets.
I noted that when I came in later to eat lunch there was a marked lack of remote influence and any presence of creepy males around. THERE WAS A LARGE GROUP OF HIGH SCHOOL AGE GIRLS IN THE MCDONALDS AND THEY WERE AT ALL DIFFERENT TABLES AROUND ME.

I think these pervert sick f*cks who do these campaigns are such professional abusers, perverts, killers and rapists that THEY AND THEIR HIGHER UP BUDDIES KNOW BETTER THAN TO MESS AROUND A PLACE WITH SCHOOL KIDS GETTING OUT AT A CERTAIN TIME, ESPECIALLY YOUNG FEMALES.

It was an eye opener for sure. Also it was a different shift working.

If it was school age males or either gender either foreign or African American in this area I would bet on some compliance with the gang stalking system (thats what ive experienced) but middle class Caucasian females. No go I guess.)

Sunday, December 7, 2014

Quietly Destroy

The campaign against me has become very sneaky. Its now mostly manipulation to keep me down/brainwashed or lead me to a horrible end. Their desired goal.

So much of the local communities are against me. I can feel the secret resentment, hatred plotting my slow sure demise quietly eminating from some of them often enough.
From the girls-jealousy seeping out of them from behind me. The women scared and dismissive yet underneath sympathetic.
It's the men you can feel hatred from. Hateful and faithful in the ongoing continued plot that they believe in and are bound to.
They breathe in and out this conspiracy. Its at their cores.

Local African American sabotuer/agitators who used to harass me are now totally non aggressive as if they went into some kind of dormant state.
Probably due to the fact that i finally reacted to being harassed by African Americans and African immigrants so heavily for years by finally snapping under pressure and writing on the side of that restaurant in Central Square Cambridge.

The street scenes are so full of informants and sell outs now.

I think the guy im with..Im still not sure about him. He's an ally but he's hard to deal with.

Im surrounded by people who have given into the system by accepting its oppression as the norm. Some are not able to seperate thenselves from the system while paying for whatever crimes they've committed. The judicial and corrections system own them.

The point is to keep the Target down. Away from any decent people on other levels of society. People who might actually be able to help the Target.
People who would be outraged if they were to know. As a perp once described the gang stalking system .."how the world really works".