An Angry Rant About People Who Helped My Ex-My Family- Then Some Healing Information Revealed About SRA Programming/Paul Solet, Little Rich Kid Who Helped My Ex

Here is a little shit involved in my life being destroyed locally. His name is Paul Solet and he made a low budget piece of crap with my ex that helped him get awards when my life was being destroyed. He makes horror films and is yet another rich snit from Newton or similar. A good ol boys club for hipsters from Newton and surrounding rich snot areas.

Maybe this little shit thinks he's a way cool Satanic hipster asshole, like so many spoilt brat scumbags from Newton who deal drugs out of their parents houses like my ex and his dealer did. So many little corrupt, fucked up rich kids who this area will say come from 'good' families only becuz they have the money to pay off for any fucked up shit these little bastards pull.

This shit was probably in NA with my fat, spoilt mummy's boy ex. Of course I was mobbed there. Of course NA is totally corrupt or else scumbag cops were in there under the pretense of some anti terror operation or as part of the federal investigation during that time locally but of course all they did was help their rich friends get out of trouble and attempt a clumbsy frame up of poor kids like me.  Sorry you didnt know about MY family's connections or my 'friends'. But that is why you are just rich kid jerk offs and I am well.. special.

Some local kid told me this shit's parents are psychologists. Perfect for MK Ultra continued experimentation. Supposedly professors or something. Yeah, I bet.

He as my ex who still needs to pay for his crimes, put out this movie about some bitch Grace, and her pregnancy that was a horror movie. Of course at the time I had been made pregnant by Scott Ashmansky who had planned this as part of destroying my life. Much to the delight of the Irish mob pub across the street in Brighton PorterBellys, which should be burned to the ground with its patrons and owner inside. If only I were violent enough...sigh.

I will never forget hearing one of the Irish shits outside my window laughing and saying "pregnant...hahahaha".  This is one of the reasons that Southie sucks for me. And also why the scalpers at Red Sox games are mean to me or have given me money out of guilt, depending on which ones.  Why I have had to deal with low life, ignorant poor piece of shit, commoner white trash from Southie fucking with me on trains, referring to me as "smiley" becuz I look unhappy.

Gee do you think such low lifes are smart enough to understand MK Ultra? I dont think so but they are smart enough to understand acting like n*ggers and doing whatever the massa cops and elite want done so they can bring more herion into their neighborhoods ensuring every beautiful blonde in sight is hooked and prostituting or theiving by the time she is 21. Becuz like good Catholics, they drink and treat themselves and thier own people roughly- like shit. Just like the Roman empire planned so many millenia ago, by destroying powerful Pagan cultures. Ireland being a jewel in thier crown.  Fools. Southie is nothing but fools. At least the Italians have some better concept of how much power they have if not how f*cked they are for abusing it.

And thats another thing. This John who runs a laundrymat in North Cambridge- and he IS a John by the way, bragged he was in the mafia one day. I just ignored it. Becuz I knew eventually he would figure out who I was if he didnt know already. And with him being associated with my old friend and career criminal as well as probably understanding how much power my mother's brother Tommy Willems had from working with Mafia for years- he was going to treat me like shit eventually. At first he gave us 80 dollars as he does this for homeless people as he used to be himself as a kid.

But one day he mentioned something in a directed conversation- about how your misfortunes and your life goes according to who your family is, who your friends are etc. Then another time he made sure he said something about drugging someone and taking naked pictures of them.

Does any of these people locally think I firstly, dont have a sense of the games idiots around me were playing or getting away with throughout this? and secondly THAT I GIVE A SHIT ABOUT SOMETHING AS PETTY AS MY EX OR WHOEVER DRUGGING ME AND TAKING PICS OR NASTY PICS WHILE I AM SLEEPING OR WHATEVER-WHOEVER. THAT IS WHY THE GANG STALKING SYSTEM GOES THIS SHIT TO PEOPLE, AS PART OF RA, TO FREAK THEM OUT BUT TO PROVIDE A COVER STORY TO THE PUBLIC. About some sex worker and rich kids being naughty and abuses of power by cops and thier crime cronies- all the perfect drama for a stupid public.

I AM SMART AND DEDICATED ENOUGH TO KNOW THIS COVER STORY BULLSHIT DOESNT MATTER AND IVE KNOWN FOR YEARS. All that matters is the fact that technologies and chemicals as outlined in MINDWAR paper by Michael Aquino and his military associates as well as whats rooted in MK Ultra ARE BEING USED TO CREATE  MASS MIND CONTROL IN THE UNITED STATES that is basically an enslaving of mankind by the elite of the world.

Who GIVES A SHIT about some rich kid pawns locally or some shitty old Jewish ugly bitches in NA from Newton and Brookline who were jealous ho's who probably resented my mother working at Ken's Pub in Allston in the 70's. (which is now a bank- shows you were society has gone.)
Or some sexist shits in NA related to some stupid old junkies in an aging, mafia connected rock band who didnt like the fact I was programmed and married to Satan as a baby as an Ritual Abuse Survivor, so therefore TEND TO FIND MOST MALES OUTSIDE THE CULT TO BE WEAK AND INSIGNIFICANT and am programmed to basically reject most males anyway. I am sure when the black helicopters and white vans started showing up, and breaking up this little harassment group made up of the  mere public as opposed to the US GOVT, they got thier heads handed to them real quick.

In fact I recall a certain asshole in Newton who I was doing art modelling for and now I looked back some time ago and realized that he was just playing mind games with me and tormenting me. He had me posing for potraits using hot lamps so I would pass out. He once told me that these two old rich bitches who were there found a poor girl like  me to be an amusement and interesting.  Then the white vans started showing up in his driveway. Suddenly he was very nervous and started cancelling appointments. hahaha.
These are the kinds of asshole rich people who play fuckin games with people like me.  I was also told a few years ago that the US Govt doesnt appreciate citizens forming little groups like this and will stop that shit immediately. I am sure my being programmed had something to do with that as any one like me would.

But as far as I am concerned alot of  these little rich shits simply did what they had to for the system at large to discredit me, destroy my life and get me traveling so the experimentation could continue. 

Many of these little bastards are connected to the Satanic factions of the music industry who are involved in this as well. More rich kids but at least the foriegn ones seem to have a bit more brains and kooth.

Doesnt this guy look like an asshole? Doesnt he look like a shit? That he would help his buddy whos a drug dealing. theiving scum, musician get rid of and torment a girlfriend? Becuz matre didnt pay attention to him or perhaps becuz matre didnt pay attention when patre or someone else paid TOO MUCH ATTENTION TO HIM? (My ex's problem from the start.)

Ive seen rich people in this area at thier worst. They are fucked up. Just as fucked up as the poor shits in Southie or the ghettos if not more so becuz they have the money to do MORE damage to themselves and others and more money to provide clean up, pay offs and keep up a good front as if nothing is wrong.

Fuck you Brookline, fuck you Heebs who thought you were helping Israel pull off 9-11 and get rid of some stupid Catholic Goya you were jealous of anyway, while of course hiding the fact that Jews locally make up the largest faction of my old friend's client list. Ive seen these people associated with her directly DO GANG STALKING ON ME AFTER I THE CAMPAIGN BECOME EVIDENT AND 24/7.

Fuck you NA, Fuck you Brookline, Fuck you Irish Mob and fuck Brighton.  These people have yet to be paid back for what they did to me. For every single mean thing they have said to me that has added to the emotional damage and suffering mentally.  How do you sue the mob? Maybe I will find a way. At least you can tell the whole world how this sick place is set up.

See these geniuses think I am no harm to them now becuz I am fully discredited and as that Mexican in San Antonio said to me "..you can be controlled".  Time has a way of bringing revenge.   Still my only problem is not being able to get everyone into the same place at once to destroy them all- partially this is what they do to ensure that a Target cant get back at anyone. This is also why they keep a target controlled and hit with tech, chemicals and gs. You begin to forget all about who was close and KNOWN TO YOU that you could rat on to authoritiies and reveal to the public and  you begin to get angry with the public themselves. Thus a person who is targeted unbeknownst to the GENERAL PUBLIC, becomes diverted by such methods and eventually through long term BRAINWASHING, ends up associating thier long term suffering and inability to gain justice with the general public. Becuz gang stalkers keep popping up within the public in public spaces.
So after years of brain damage and harassment like this and brainwashing, the person still has stashed anger over whats been done. Now they are being baited with what seems like random people messing with them. Half insane, brain damaged and wounded more than any other human being could stand (except a Survivor probably) they cant stand it anymore- cant take THE VERY REAL PRESSURE. And due to self preservation cant kill themselves (outside suicide programming from internal sources), they get a weapon and go shoot up a public place.

Its one of the saddest realities someone like me has to deal with. Becuz  I know from experience how that comes to pass. How it happens, what causes it.

And these shits in society, these priveledged people who do these things and are part of these things are causing these horrible events in society. And they dont care, as long as they get what THEY want. 

Who's the worst of them? Not the overt Satanists in my opinion. Its true what they say that Christians bring church burnings and destructive events on themselves. Becuz SATANISTS ARE OFTEN SHOWING YOU OUTRIGHT OR TELLING YOU WHAT THEY ARE ABOUT BUT PEOPLE REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT DUE TO SOCIETAL NORMS. So in a way  they are challenging how much of a Christian you really are. You claim to be but you dont believe or defend against 'Satan' or his works. SO YOU BRING MISERY ON YOURSELVES.

Its unbelievable how many bands I listen to due to my research (and becuz part of my is comfortable with the music I suppose, or Ive been fire burned against its power to destroy at this point, perhaps some alchemic quality makes it so I simply convert the energy into something I can use for power. Dunno.) that are overt in thier content- the material they use for thier music, that tells the listeners exactly what they are about. And people believe the fallacy that they are simply artists making things up. Even the intricate stuff, the magickal symbols etc, specifically when dealing with artists who are using ancient paganism with Satanism. That is genuinely powerful.
The public lives in denial.

You arent supposed to be able to wipe out evil as many Christians would have you believe (lol) but to know what it is and protect yourself. Be prepared. Choose what you really believe.

For Americans living in a Satanic system basically that exploits and hurts people around the world for thier standard of living- its hard for them to really see what evil is. And Christianity has become so twisted, so religious. If it ever was useful to begin with. Maybe a thousand five hundred years ago.

I always seem less angry with them for whats happened- for them its business. Its the kids like these locals, who profess to be Jews or Christians. Or from 'good' families or thier parents are professors etc.
I hate them most becuz they hide. They lie. And unlike people putting themselves out there to the public- they are cowards. They are the worst scum in any situation like this. And usually they dont have to live with the seriousness of what Satanic factions do to people especially when connected to the military.

They are the ultimate foolish pawns and I hate them most of all. And usually as artists they are far less talented and mediocre than those willing to bet thier power on being overt about who they are...even if the public dont believe and thats the deception in itself.

You wonder if these jerks all work for local intelligence agencies, the military industrial complex or just the cops and thier organized crime bros. You wonder if they understand MK Ultra fully or Ritual Abuse. Or if they simply understand the situation to mean that they and thier rich friends create, manage and destroy poorer people from supposed 'bad' families, as mind controlled slaves for thier drug running, sex industries or other crimes that seem to be run by the poor or organized crime but are at top levels perpetrated by the military, foreign countries LIKE Israel and the intelligence agencies.  Its just so they can get what they want and stay rich. They actually believe that some poor person who seemingly doesnt matter should serve and die for them.

If given a chance, tomorrow, I would have them all die for me. Specifically those who knew me, were close to me and chose to help fuck me over instead of clue me in. My  mother's family included. These people were total assholes. They actually believe that no one on the planet is going to believe me if I claim that in the local area there was a conspiracy of many people known and unknown to me.

Fuck America. And to hell with New England. There are people and places in the world that will believe me.

I didnt imagine that someone in Port Huron MI told me that Jake my ex, that asshole got his foot in the door in Hollywood doing Aerosmith's video's and that bore Guitar Hero becuz "yeah, he 'helped' someone".

These people think that just becuz they are in power locally, that they work with the petty factions of power here locally and some like entertainment people bigger than that, that they have the ultimate say in what happens to one of thier victims.  And the police are absolutely the worst insufferable bastards who are in on the bad side of this. They and thier brain dead cronies from Southie think this is a running joke.

Its not gonna be a joke forever.

I once heard, many years ago in Southie as I was walking through to spange I think or go to my storage, a younger cop talking to some people. He was talking about me saying "She WANTS to be taken seriously".  Wise man.
Hopefully his career will go far someday, instead of the likes of that scum who was head of the Brookline police...during the time my life was being destroyed in that apartment in Brighton. I CAN STILL SEE HIM STANDING RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME.WITH HIS LITTLE GOLD FUCKING BADGE. FAT OLD WHITE HAIRD MOTHERFUCKER. LOOKING SMUG  FOR THE POWER HANDED TO HIM AND THE COMMUNITY DURING POST 9-11 AND THIS FIXED FEDERAL INVESTIGATION. BUT UNDERNEATH LIKE EVERY COP WHO LASTS THIS LONG, THERE WAS GUILT. Fucking guilt. He KNEW he was wrong. He KNEW it was wrong.
And those detectives harassing and fucking with me in Brookline while those idiots at Walgreens tried to go along with that stupid attempted frame up to try to peg ME as the pills dealer when my ex was the one. I bet the old bitch he got all those pills from, when her man died of cancer never even said a word. I was told my own two faced, back stabbing mother had to go to court for me.

Of course she did- why would she want to be in trouble for hiding 100,000 dollars under my name illegally WHICH IS WHY I PROBABLY WAS A PERSON OF INTEREST TO THE FBI and of course which is why shit head cops were calling me up asking for 'donations' for thier police charity.

FUCK YOU. FUCK ALL OF YOU. Instead of being a lone shooter so you can get rid of me I am going to get rid of you. By getting ouf of the US to someplace where you have no control.So I can destroy you. A place where people hate Americans for this reason exactly as the story I have told in part here.

PEOPLE LIKE THE THIS WHO DESTROYED MY LIFE IN BOSTON ARE WHY PERHAPS WE GOT BOMBED ON 9-11. WHY FOREIGNERS STORM AND BURN EMBASSIES. Becuz of covert operations internationally played out by stupid pawns like I just described as well as people living under mind control or who will do whatever authority wants so they can get money for themselves or thier communities from Homleand Security or whoever.

Greed of the people in the know, who are part of these operations is what gets us hated world wide-and I know not all Americans are guilty or know about these things.

Why it was so exciting or interesting for an entire huge area of Boston, Cambridge and surrounding areas, thier police forces and civilians to be in on destroying the life of just one poor woman who didnt have any money, no power or any knowledge of how the world worked was THAT big of a power trip to the people I encountered I will never understand.

They may have just been looking at my appearance or felt powerful destroying someone connected to my family who has mafia connections or I was connnected to that career criminal. Somehow they felt they were taking down someone powerful when they destroyed my life.

OR PERHAPS THAT IS JUST WHAT NOBODIES, SHEEP AND INSECURE COMMON CITIZENS LOOK LIKE WHEN YOU ALLOW THEM TO BE IN ON BLACK OPS OR PSY OPS- COVERT TYPE OPERATIONS BECUZ IT MAKES THIER PETTY LITTLE STUPID LIVES SEEM EXCITING AND THEY ARE INTERESTING.

I think thier greatest crime was getting off on destroying someone like me who was so powerless. Where is the thrill in that? I still dont get it.

Its probably becuz they dont dare go after my asshole Uncle Tom Willems or his two princess brat daughters (who the family has used to cover thier seedy, criminal activity in the 70s while discrediting me becuz I was going to write a book about it and tell my cousins everything they did to me and did in general. They are little Christians, an ordained minister and a PH D. Perfect cover for that scumbag family of mine. Who of course has police connections from the old days and in the form of a relation whos a detective in Waltham. The Willems family come from a horrible violent pedophile who was a long serving US Marine. My uncle Tom was a killer for the Italian mob, my mother is a chiild abuser, a stripper and a total bitch that has connections to what she describes as 'the syndacate'  and thier sister Deborah Willems now Donnelley was a fuckin hooker who worked for a black ghetto piece of shit named Honey from Roxbury who should have been destroyed years ago.  If I ever was involved in the sex industry- I kept it WASPy. And female. Fuck blacks, fuck pimps and fuck Roxbury. Its probably why the local ghetto scum think I am going to have anything to do with them.. I WILL SLICE YOUR THROAT IF YOU GET CLOSE ENOUGH TO FUCK ME. Remember n*ggers of Boston- my aunt is a stupid six foot German/Irish/ Dutch/French bitch. HER NOR MY MOTHER ARE ITALIAN NOR LITHUANIAN/POLISH. Try going to live in Eastern Europe. You'll note that my people dont like outsiders. And they hate darkies. And they are brutish violent people, the last to take on Christiainity in Europe.
You best research more on white peoples my friends becuz your knowledge seems to stop at the shitheads in southie, the WASP rich assholes, the Jews and the Italians you know will kill or beat your ass. You really should get out of Boston more. Yes, this city you think you own, where you shun anyone who is from say a city just outside Boston, becuz in your limited mentality, they are not 'from Boston' proper. Hmph. You are welcome to this piece of shit. Becuz you are just kept down house slaves. And you know it. Keep serving the local elite, then you will get what you want. Cross them and you are fucked. Yeah, you have sooooo  much power. LMFAO.

Anyway, my family needs to pay for what they did. Strangely they would never cross their horrible pedophile father that messed them up so badly yet I would be regularly ignored, kept down and abused. 
Becuz thats what MIND CONTROLLED people do who are too WEAK to walk away from a controlling fucked up family.

Do they honestly believe that destroying me and scapegoating  me is going to help keep this wonderful illustrious front they have had the opportunity to form WHILE I WAS BEING DESTROYED OVER THESE YEARS? My cousin is a white wash. She is a lie. She is NOT what that family is about. She is a product of dirty money gotten by my uncle with his connections to organized crime. She comes from the seed of rapists, murdering soldiers and killers.  Just like I do. Is this why some power out there believes that I should become a Christian? To pay for the family's crimes? 

What a crock of shit. Becuz no one bothered my family until my grandfather died. THEN THE WOMEN IN THE FAMILY WERE HANDLED IMMEDIATELY. Becuz this is what they do in a  pedophile family that is part of Ritual Abuse and programming and mind control. My grandfather was the controller of the family. When the controlling abuser dies the system gets very nervous about the women especially having no controls on them, specifically male authority.

Remember that this entire problem is perpetuated by sexist scum who believe little girls and women should serve as sex objects and forever be under male control. The so called 'decent' people invovled in gang stalking are often involved somehow in benefitting from this system wether through livelihood or pleasure persuits or addictions.

And I will get back at every  one of these fuckin scumbags in my memory.

And I will never be stupid enough to fall for being pushed into going postal. If I do believe me, i wont go public. I have a very specific list of who I want to take down with me. Its merely choosing who deserves to die and who doesnt.

And do you realize becuz I talk of revenge so and that I am tormented into being discredited that locally I am watched and kept an eye on?  BY THE VERY COMMUNITY WHO KNOWS DAMN WELL THEY DESTROYED MY LIFE?

And we have all seen that so much Homeland Security is involved in this, that all these twats that are supposed to 'watch' dangerous people are in fact the people who are harassing Targets getting us pissed off to begin with.

YOUR TAX DOLLARS THROUGH HOMELAND SECURITY IS CREATING LONE SHOOTERS. CHAOS. DESTRUCTION. HARM TO PEOPLE AND HORRIBLE THINGS TO HAPPEN TO INNOCENTS.

Your country is evil. Your system is evil. I can attest this from experience.

Who do I sound like now as I speak in such  a way? Do I sound like a foriegn terrorist, out to fight in one last ditch effort to defend my very life and identity?  WHAT DO YOU THINK THIS COUNTRY AND ITS CRONIES DOES TO PEOPLE IN COUNTRIES LIKE THAT TO GET THEM TO BECOME TERRORISTS?????!!

Covert operations. Psy ops. Black projects etc. These people are a big threat to Israel. Not becuz just their Muslim beliefs but becuz they ARE the original cradle of civilization in Iraq and that area. The Jews know that thier religion can be traced as being ripped off from older cultures as with Christianity being ripped off from Babylon (the trinity etc.).
It seems anyone who seems to possess knowledge or DNA of the ancients who exists outside the modern world or doesnt fit in well as one of its slaves is targeted for deletion. Becuz when trying to enslave humanity, truly spiritual people who live in poverty but are strong in spirit must be destroyed. They wont make very good slaves or consumers. 

I dont know why locally alot of people even want to be part of something so vile as helping the govt pull of the 9-11 deception. 9-11 was a turning point where the powers that be could weed out who was going to be controlable and go along with thier bullshit and who was going to be a problem to the NWO. Its just unbelievable to me that so many people I knew sucked balls so hard and were total assholes and traitors to the Constitution for their own gain. But being Boston, the endless greed of the people in this area was underestimated by me.  This area is full of c*nts who are used to ruling over the rest of the country and getting thier way. Being in a bad economy or being threatened by a war where they might not get thier high quality of life anymore (waaaahh!) and would do anything to get Homeland money, please the intelligence or military industrial complex presence here or some assholes in the mob.

What can one expect from a bunch of assholes who think a child molesting Irish mobster scumbag is a fuckin folk hero? Boston is sick but unfortunately powerful. Of course a country like this needs sick fucks in power who can present a nice clean front to the rest of the world. It works out nicely it seems.
The population here lives in denial about what the organized crime factions do to people to get the money and power they do.

Organized crime has them hypnotized and has for years. Thats the sheep for you. Thats Boston.

Its nice to know there is  a whole country out there where Boston dont mean shit or doesnt even exist for most people. I am asked by people in TX where New England is on the map, they think its a state (hahahaha). There is a  whole world out there were MA doesnt matter, the local scum who fucked me over dont matter and where even America doesnt matter.

I know that everyone who is guilty of destroying my life wants me to just vanish and never come back to Boston again.  But its not possible. They have something of mine and I wont leave until I get it. They took from me during those years and must return what they took. Its the way things work you see.

And for these fools to actually believe I am nothing more than some homeless bitch from a bad family or broken home they can disregard into the past or not care about....what about all the 'help' I got? What about all those white vans and black helicopters?  Why am I still here, sane? 

Becuz I am a very important person. Becuz I had and have power. Becuz I was meant to be powerful to begin with and THEY INTERFERED. I was meant to be a Winner and they ensured I would only lose.  Remember I AM NOT SUPPOSED TO BE A HOMELESS WOMAN. I WAS SUPPOSED TO GO TO UMASS AND BECOME A COUNCILOR DOING ART PROJECTS ON THE SIDE.

But I couldnt go to UMass becuz that bitch cousin of mine was there getting her PH D in genetic engineering. So she works for the NWO which is why she is left alone as well as her father was in on my gang stalking campaign.
(You are an ordained minister and a Christian yet you work as a genetic engineer. You are working against your 'God' arent you?  Dont think about this too hard. This bitch is just doing what my family and the cops and the mafia wants which is to gain status with a degree and seem religious-becuz it makes a good front to cover for all the criminal activity they were involved in. Not to mention MK Ultra and programming.)

What I dont understand is that I know damn well my mother was conscously involved in my being programmed. I recall her bringing me to a psychiatrist in Brookline MA for sessions related to programming and RA. I also recall her bringing me to locations for what I dont recall its blacked out, but I had to cover my eyes during the ride so I could not see where  we were going.

And I recall distinctly that she and her sleazy wimp boyfriend in the mid 70s took a Dracula comic book away from me, snuck it from me while we were moving in Roslindale one day, and this is probably becuz whoever was involved in the Spiritual Marriage ritual (being married to Satan while in infancy or as a toddler as a way of bonding the cult member to the cult for life. Other kinds of cults use spiritual marriages to the cult leader. In Satanic cults they use a human male as a stand in for the entitity.) in the Satanic cult I faintly recall wore a Dracula cape and looked like the classic movie character.

So if my mother was involved in my being programmed etc why was it such a surprise to her that she was a documented radiation experimentee related to MK Ultra?? 

I have to remember my mother is severely compartmentalized. Ive tested her years ago and she either doesnt remember things or refuses to and makes up her own sequence of events. Usually to avoid painful emotions.

I only had slight abuse at the foster home and people trying to mess with me later on when I was older. Any sexual contact in my childhood I have no memory of. It seems all ritualistic anyway not actually physical.  My mother on the other hand had her father actually raping her and her brother also (mr perfect daughter genetic engineer Christian.) which I dont blame him for becuz thier father caused it. And I dont blame him becuz he was compartmentalized himself. And I now have a theory that pedophiles are created by ritual abuse groups and used as controllers to create such little girls for thier sick fucked up uses in society. Due to the way I was targeted early on in this it was obvious that they were seeing if decent people could be pushed, tortured and brainwashed into being pedophiles. Which of course I didnt go for, becuz I am not one to begin with. Kinky yes, into fucking children, no. I see no thrill in that. I only see harm. But becuz of my kinky fantasy life with my ex and my association with that bitch career criminal the GS system tried to do the Self Fullfilling Prophecy routine- make up shit about the TI and have the public believe it, then whatever you do to them to make  them that way will not come as a surprise to anyone THUS NO ONE WILL SUSPECT ANYTHING DUE TO SEEING A CHANGE IN THE PERSON'S CHARACTER.
You have no idea what I have seen as far as what the Gang Stalkers will do to cause chaos in an area.

In fact this DOES explain why countries riot or war or become terrorists. Ive experienced this first hand. They use the tech and chemicals involved in mind control to stir up shit in the population along with psy ops like gang stalking by human beings. What a scam. Then they can cause unrest, lone shootings, craziness, chaos, violence etc wherever they are deployed. 

Is it true that I have the information in my head that is the answer to true world peace? That I have come face to face with the forces that cause every war, every disaster and every bad thing to happen in our world, and since I can tell people that, this would explain why the military is needed to be so big, why all that money has to go into it and weapons.

Yeah, I suppose if people listened to me I could cost them some money huh?

I know my mother is a multiple and probably she worked on having me programmed in an alter ego. She seemed to know very little about how MK Ultra was connected to the radiation experimentation she'd experienced or even its ties to Satanism and Ritual Abuse. In fact, she did what she always does- listened to what experts and people in authority told her to do, then dropped it when the men in black bullshit stunts came around and tailed her for a while.

I should have never been afraid of her but you gotta understand that she's programmed with some very nasty stuff to either keep me in line or kill  me- as thats been illustrated she is capable of doing. She is programmed like a gate keeper to protect that family of hers. I believe she would murder for them becuz its been programmed into her that way.

Yet look at how controllable she is by these forces. Even when I left for good she was talking about being in therapy where the therapist was telling her she was a female warrior compared to her brother who was being a heartless shit and trying to get her evicted from my grandmother's house (with all that money he spent on his spoiled daughter's wedding, and how much he has he cant help his sister. Of course not- SHES GOT THE GOODS ON HIM. I was told the reason that she is treated better than me is becuz she was the goods on the family and I dont. So its more important to coddle and control HER than  me.).  She still doesnt realize that so many of these people in our lives are PART OF GANG STALKING. They are part of the cult, part of the medical portion of ongoing MK Ultra. Part of the conspiracy.

And they will continue to tell her anything she needs to hear, to get her to continue to put up with her situation, her brother's abuse, the community control on her her delusion that the cops actually respect her and work with her. Her obsession with the Marines and her doing some sort of work for them. Of course she will- becuz she was always more damaged than me, always more controllable. The poor thing is totally traumatized by male authority. She literally has to fear for her life every time male authority is aggressive with her.  I know that cannot be easy.

Me on the other hand, I recall two dolls. A Raggedy Andy and a Raggedy Ann doll. I recall some sort of murder of a little boy. Something ritualistic. A ritual that in its terror was supposed to adhere to me a sensibility about males.(such things are sort of put out of a child's mind as unimportant. Remember little children dont understand death. If you present it to them in such ways they dont understand things like death, murder or that death is the end of life. Thier minds arent formed yet. To die for them is not like it is for older people who have lived. To a child's mind, the other child disappears in a mean way thats put forth by the authorities of the cult. However in a primitive sense the murder does cause the child to be traumatized because on some level they understand the severity of taking human life, probably in some animal way. This is downplayed and muted by the cult. Yet the underlying effect and fear is used to bond messages, programming and the cult's authority to the child.)

Focus was put onto the dolls as a pair. Then after the event of death the Raggedy Andy doll was made obviously to disappear and I was presented with the Raggedy Ann doll. The message told to me I faintly recall was that little boys were not as important as little girls. Also the message was that the cult wouldnt tolerate any males in contact with me that they did not provide or approve of. That the exiting of males was going to be part of my existence, that they were interchangable. And that the cult and authorities would protect me forever against 'little boys' or males that interferred in my activities or life.

(remember many of the memories recalled by Survivors could be or in part 'screen memories' which are put into the person's mind to discredit them etc. The curious thing about memories as mine above are that they MAY NEVER HAVE ACTUALLY OCCURED IN REAL LIFE BUT STILL SERVE TO PRODUCE THE EFFECT OF PROGRAMMING IN THE MIND OF THE RECIPIENT.  In other words, the people over at the False Memory Syndrome foundation or whatever those CIA pedophiles call themselves, might be correct in claiming these are false memories. BUT AS USUAL WITH SUCH DECIEVERS THAT DOESNT MEAN THEY WERE NOT CREATED AND PLACED THERE BY DESIGN FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROGRAMMING. Ive already posted that I discovered that many of the people connected to the FMSF are mathmeticians and computer programmers. And recently I posted about that book I found online about an alleged survivor of programming but as an adult by factions doing classified projects, where exotic, sophisticated technology was used. Could this be the basis of Survivors programming? And perhaps many memories are implanted for the purpose of programming humans virtually?)
I believe this was also done as a strong part of programming to have me purposely NOT fear male authority probably so I could do what I am doing exactly now and look upon all cops, mobsters and politicians as just 'little boys' and know inside that if they did something to interfere with me, the cult would 'take care' of them.
And its happened repeatedly. It also makes it easier for me to deal with the deaths of males around me ongoing in this ordeal. Many people have been harmed, usually males, that either interferred with me, got in the way or were used by scumbag cops locally to try to scare me or intimidate me. Like trying to intimdate to me that I had something to do with the death of someone I was staying in the next room of this SRO. The man was set up and I believe murdered by a drug overdose. Then of course perps are on the bus talking about 'if you think you murdered someone' or something like being suspected of murder.

Its not that I am cold hearted its just that my programming basically makes THE CULT my main man or at least the entity in the spiritual marriage is my 'husband' if you will. No one is going to fuck with me but yet, no human male is ever acceptable for long as a mate. As usual Satanic factions give you power but you have no frickin life. 
It also explains why the black metal guitarist I write about involved in media psy ops was used. This guy claims to be Satan's minister on earth. What more fitting than to regain control of me via tagging onto old programming and RA. Seperate me from my lover Jake, have him betray me, have alot of males in authority abuse me like cops, firemen etc in public spaces, make me seem disrespected by males generally and of course its going to be easy to remove me from the human world as a female and have me be so traumatized I revert to a mental world now with only ghost files of programming due to all the brain damange and destruction of internal worlds,  where the system can have me marginalized from every HUMAN person I used to know and replace my life with a sort of virtual one where old programming is used to latch onto, so that this 'Satans minister on earth' is now somehow a stand in for the entity just as whoever it was in the original spiritual marriage ritual. 

This might be also some sort of bigger work the Satanists are doing such as bringing in a Satanic Age by doing things to all the people connected to the cult. It might be that all females with that ritual experience during a certain point during Bush were to have an experience bonding to the entity (using tech to fool the person of course) but there must always be a living male to SYMBOLIZE the entity. 

Its great to feel protected and uh, so taken care of  but the constant torment is just a bit much for me to deal with. I didnt mind living with my programming in the backround in the old days or even recovering memories so I could go through them and become a better person- but whatever the world has become whatever has happened since Bush specifically DURING Bush, its very demanding. Its like people like me are supposed to not live normal lives. I want to just be a normal human being again whos a recovering RA Survivor.

The problem is that all of the tech used creates in our reality now a world of mind control we live  under. For Survivors this helps the cult to keep us in a virtual reality, of which they have created partially through RA, gang stalking etc.

Even the programming I have thats supposed to be 'good' in nature- Rosicrucian or Templar monk is a drag to have to exist in as if its reality every day. It was just a part of myself  before. Internal programming is not all that makes up a person. Its only buried in parts of their minds. What this system does is try to do actual brain damage and modification (keeping me from my normal life before being targeted heavily) so that the person HAS nothing else left other than programming to be thier identities.

Its probably part of the human experimentation to see if they can create robotic humans who can be reduced to just programming. That is what it seems like.

Yet I have created other identities. I am a Traveler. I have friends, I travel the country and meet people who know nothing about this other stuff- I hope.   But there is always this knawing inside of me, and the unresolved injustice of what was done creating a rift. Which is why people who dont know everything about us or understand us think Survivors are crazy. You try leading a double or triple life as well as fighting the NWO as an activist and see how much pressure you can take. Its not easy when the same faction seems to be pushing you into being a Satanist willfully but also a Christian which makes very little sense- other than to hide the reality of programming  I assume. I notice they refuse to allow any sort of  Hermetic content like in my Rosicrucian programming.  I dont quite understand that. Perhaps adhereance to established religion due to it validating the man made world as it stands now is what they require.

Lately with failing health and being targeted what seems more heavily with tech I feel myself breaking apart. I can no longer keep up my worldly identity or, I am being forced to give up this RA and programming knowledge of myself in favor of existing purely as my mundane self, the Traveler etc.

Whoever is behind whats going on in the NWO they are elitists who believe humanity must be programmed and designed according to thier wishes. They dont believe for instance that someone like myself should have been left alone to reprogram. What was it in me that was good, thought of humanity and wanted only to reprogram in 2004 or so to use my life experience to help people and also serve myself finally by being allowed to express my artistic talent? Whatever that was- Balance, thier 'god' or even light bearing Lucifer I dont know. I know that it was something good that existed in me held onto since childhood. A natural intelligence that exists in all human life.

Yet THIS IS WHAT THE SYSTEM DENIED AUTHORITY. THIS IS WHAT THEY PREVENTED FROM ALLOWING ME TO HEAL PROPERLY.

So whoever the 'elite' are and whatever they are doing to bring on the NWO, it seems to be oppressive, dictorial and not in the interest of love or light or helping humanity.  They seem to desperately want to build this structure of thiers, but its very inhuman in nature. But I must say it is very big. And structured. But its anti human.

I hope someone read all of this, the angry rant and the breaking into actually being able to reveal some information on a Sunday.

Becuz by tomorrow in this location I will be experiencing living under whatever is in this area that keeps me forgetful, dumbed down, and unable to remember or reveal what I really want to. Its almost appropriate to say 'goodbye' until next Sunday or a holiday. Sad really.

Seeking True NWO Rebels

I need people around me who are as serious as i am about fighting the NWO. If u r a dedicated rebel let me know. Travelers especially.

I am sick of the complacent people i meet here in the US traveling especially in MA.

New Expensive Police Station Perhaps Reason Getting Harassment In Seemingly Small Quiet Town

Was told police having new police station built here many times the size of old one.

And that they need to pay it off. Gee how do people do that? How wud a town.make money?

Gang stalking. Or get homeland or other govt funding? GS.

Chicopee Continued

HER property?

Shes just an employee not the owner of Pride. Ive been to that truck stop many times. Guess its just the day shift whos on a pathetic small time power trip.

No one in these areas ever pays attention to the fact that we are clean, dont leave messes and arent drunk and dont steal.

The shitty treatment we got in Chicopee is either gang stalking or pathetic bullshit inverse guilt becuz Springfield and Worcester are so close and they know these areas are poor and ghetto.

But we dont look like we are from ghetto areas. These people are so desperate to hold onto what little they have compared to their neighbors that every Traveler is some homeless bum who offends their petty middle class sensibilities (i saw the size of those houses around the conservation area. Looks like living in a closet. Hahahaha.)

Chicopee Massachusetts

Cops pleasant enuf but riding our asses due to uptight yuppie citizen compliants.

we just walked through their State Conservation area becuz we cant walk on interstate highways in MA. In New Mexico or Oregon they dont give a shit or its legal. But MA you'll get pulled off right away. we came out of the park (lovely walk) into some small suburban nightmare. It made me suicidal and lonely- all that fake lifestyle. The perfect little blonde child stuck in a house with just her parents- a small house on a street surrounded by other small houses. I dont understand how people live this way.

the police were fairly tolerant at truck stop highway area but then when we came out of the Conservation area the residents freaked and a cop said they got numerous calls. It is one of the only towns I sympathize with the cops becuz the residents are so damn ignorant.

The next cop in the shopping center with more workmen was a bit snooty but so were the workmen there also working on the power lines. Generally in this area of Chicopee I found that the 'regular guys' were giving Travelers dirty looks and being generally put off by us.

you asshole the Massachusetts in these little towns the most paranoid up tight people I have ever seen in the United States.
and I travel the country regularly every year.
get your head out of your fucking asses and stop thinking about you so fucking entitled up here.

Your neighborhood isnt rich enough for anybody to give a shit about and al queda isn't going to March down your street anytime soon.

stop harassing travelers and grow the fuck up. go shooting C N N up your damn arms you fucking news addicted drama queens.

and maybe you should get out of your little town more often and see what real life is about.

by the way the lady at the truck stop came up to my friend and told him that it was her property. she's an idiot and for the most part you people are all idiots.

you do have a nice local park but of course you have no problem ruining the forest and order to put in more electrical lines stupid pathetic yuppie the realities.

The Public Arent Complaining About What's REALLY Wrong With The MBTA

The MBTA might be using a policy of harassing anyone who draws attention to the flaws in their janitorial services, which they have a history of difficulty with. From a discrimination lawsuit in 96 for a man being too ethnic to be hired to Empire cleaning employees complaining they fear for their lives and health due to the T demanding dangerous workplace practices and environment.

There is an employee in the camera monitor station playing games with his authority there in relation to a potential complaint about the dangers of having non English speakers as janitors at the MBTA.

If this is not officially his juristiction then why does he persist in psychological warfare with potential complaintant?

Becuz his job may well be to contain or bait any possible complaints about T policies..

I will post full story later.

But take note one thing I have seen thoughout this ordeal over a decade is that when PEOPLE FEEL POWERLESS TO CONTROL REAL CORRUPTION DUE TO ABUSE OF AUTHORITY they then turn to diversions, scape goating, witch hunts and whining. Then of course the Metro (Really Bostonians? REALLY? Why would one of the smartest cities in America read that sh*t rag? Welcome to the great dumbdown.) actually publishes something basically criticizing the public for complaining!!

Wake up. Take control back or live like manipulated slaves. You may be content with that but some of us aren't.

And stop reading propaganda bullshit just becuz someone hands it to u free in the morning. Laziness is what will get u snagged into a net first and foremost.

No Google Results For "African American Saboteurs"- The Greatest Cover PsyOps Agents Could Ever Hope For

http://www.google.com/search?q=%22african+American+saboteurs%22++-black&btnG=&hl=en&biw=533&bih=63&sa=2

Most articles and results list African Americans as VICTIMS of such sophisticated plots and crimes instead of the perps.

The greatest cover any legion of criminals and agents could ever hope for...exists in western countries and world wide in any African American community.

New Bad News

My new friend Ive been traveling with there might be something happening with him thats really bad. I could accept his other flaws or weird habits. But this new development is just not cool. I like the kid..but if this turns out to b what it looks like, its too much for me to deal with.

Cover Stories Still Being Spread By Locals, GS System Monitors Target's Bank Accounts

Edit tomorrow used voice instead of type.I'm really sick of people saying that I'm a rat. During Bush I was being pushed and mindf*cked into going to the FBI and blabbing but I didn't. Recently there are forces that are making it so that I should do that even now. Why I should run off to the fucking feds and telling what little I know and try to get people busted-put away for life as I was told that I could potentially have done during the Federal Investigation in Boston during Bush. I'm also being coerced constantly to get on the internet and write everything and publish it.I don't think that's a very good idea.(If the authorities want to play games like pull off 9-11 and protect select career criminals as well as abuse authority and implement mass mind control and abuse anti terror to cover up black/classified projects then why would they deserve ANY respect at all from the people? But the number one reason I didnt and never will is becuz instead of issuing me a subpoena like they are supposed to they played games like Jack asses so dont deserve sh*t. I had people around me telling me i didnt know anything and then ive got people all the way in Freemont CA accusing me of being there becuz i was running from the FBI. Since when does the FBI play the bullshit mind games I saw around Boston and the rest of the country? Since when does the FBI have use of these weapons and technologies? Since when does the FBI have a group of arrogant young people on a bus asking me what I think of George Bush as part of the 'investigation'?They think they got away with all this but they havent yet begun to pay. And pay they will.) Still even people going to Harvard like make fun of me and call me a rat. Actually, that just happened 5 minutes ago. Some little white chick with another white girl and a black dude , all rich kids, walked by and 1 of the white girls told the other 2 to "watch out for the rats."

Of course the black dude had to get off on the power trip overtly instead of being stealth like the whites.

so as I walked away I said " Watch out for the n*ggers actually ".

There's no fucking way I'm going to let any black person get away with social climbing into society by using me as a fucking stepping stone, that will be the f*cking day.

Here in the Northeast white people only think about class not race and they will stab another white person in the back if they are of a different class and side with blacks if they are their class or their house slaves.

There's no way that I should be hanging around Harvard at all but somehow I always end up back here in this area and I always come back and try to get things settled like find lawyers or go to doctors and it never works.

In fact I had all my doctor's appointments lined up for Sept and because of being torturednand tormented and hit with whatever the fuck it is I got weirded out and canceled all of them.

Now I have to reschedule which means I spend more time here than I probably was going to spend like I have to get things done next month instead of this month.

I usually leave here to go travel about middle of October. There's no way that I should be here past October 15th.

But magically now I'm going to have to be here past that.Also I should really be sleeping anywhere but Harvard Square or Cambridge because obviously the place makes me sick and on top of that I can't really get anything done anyway obviously .

so whats my other choice?

2 leave without getting any health care at all or taking advantage of my insurance in the State of Massachusetts.

The people here also are extremely ignorant about me being able to move to another state. An employee who works at my old storage place Castle Storage in South Boston we're all in on the gang stalking campaign, and the guy that worked there Frank always asked ignorant questions like "Why did you come back to Boston anyway Rachael?" just typical of the people surrounding the campaign locally. They've always seemed to be under the impression the harassment campaign is only local. Yet they acknowledging that I'm being harassed in my own home town so I can't live here they think it's okay because they don't seem to understand that I can't go anywhere without being harassed nation wide.

so targeted individual gets mobbed basically by a bunch of people taking actions into their own hands, vigilantly actions basically, without really understanding the entire situation.

When someone asks me why did I come back to oBoston anyway it's really unfair question and it's part of the intimidation really because I can't really answer them truthfully becuz Ive been conditioned by the gang stalking itself to believe telling the truth will makes me sound crazy. Yet the person asking the question is acknowledging there is a harassment campaign.

this is a very clever way of keeping the public in ignorance and working for the system who damn well knows the full extent that the target is being destroyed and harassed, but since the target can't say anything because theyve been trained to think that people will think they r mentally ill, and especially if target is survivor will then stay in that alter personality who pretends to not know anything about being targeted individual.

this way the larger system can have control of both target and the ignorant public.

I wouldnt even be able to write this or express what I'm expressing right now had there not been a major thunderstorm just a few hours ago, which of course is 1 of the varibles or conditions that breaks through the mind control of this system in this area.

personally I don't want to stay in this location well for my going to get healthcare for health issues now has become very serious.

I know what they're doing they're trying to keep me here as long as possible to help for the destroy my health as well as for their behavior modification program this point is nothing more than a major lobotomy.

I'm still going to save up to leave the country trying to interfere with also.

do you realize it didn't this particular area of Massachusetts Cambridge and Boston we are found this to be in Cambridge monitor how much money at least targeted individuals like myself have in my bank account it seems it's done hooked up to places like star market always in on the gang stalking specifically through the security system in there store.

Ive posted that before.

why do you think they wanted everybody on Social Security to go paperless and get a card ? elektronik we keep an eye on not only your location purchases and how much you have left in your account.

because I had money saved another card 1 of those reload debit card you get in the stores when I used to purchase something at Star market I got this really strong interface, this impression that someone watching and monitoring, it was very sneaky and tell her that I had his money in a different place so that I had money in my account what it looks like I didn't have any money on my main debit card.

that's because of course you get targeted here according to how much money you have in your accounts. I also posted that a few summers ago.

the mind control here is so overwhelming and so viscous did you think I have the sense to stay away from this location.

this is why I want to leave the country is no matter where I go in the United States matter what location I'm in I get targeted and this location though it seems like the safest and most liberal probably the most damaging physically and mentally.

just use it is determined to destroy me make me behave even though they are the ones that are wrong to begin with and they know it.

why would I want to live somewhere where is obvious you are considered an asshole you don't have any money?

Why Cant I Leave MA And Stay Away ? Mind Control

I don't know why I keep coming back here. It's like I'm brainwashed to do so.

Only time I feel normal in this place or can't get anything done Is after 12 midnight in the middle of the night Possibly Sunday Holidays And after a very heavy rain storm.

And everything gets much easier when you get away from the MBTA bus and train lines. Specially the train lines.

That tells me is there some sort of management of people going on Its covert an unseen It makes sure it handles anywhere Where there's neither poor people Or students.

I can't get away from this place And after it rains like this  I realize and I say to myself what the fuck am I still doing here? I think the reason that I end up having to come back here all the time and then I am kept here against my will is so that the behavior modification can be completed or at least furthered.

because the only time I'm able to actually think about leaving Wwe I could actually executed and do it is on a Sunday specifically holidays and like this after a rainstorm .

I just join the YMCA so I can take a shower anytime I want and have a locker. tell me what the fuck am I doing drinking something in paying every month when I'm supposed to be leaving? my plan was to try to find something outside of the city area to stay so I can actually come in and get my healthcare taken care of and then leave, without having to stay within the city limits why I know it's extremely unhealthy.

but no I always end up forgetting somehow that I shouldn't be leaving here now shouldn't be in Harvard this is like the cave of the enemy if you will like the enemies territory is the worst place I could be living what I'm always drawn back here I always end up staying here and while I'm staying here I always end up getting sick fat and can't get anything done at all.

so tell me that mind control is involved to chemicals psychological operations and the use of the technologies that are listed in the Mind War paper.

America is sick to begin with but Boston and Cambridge in especially Massachusetts is extremely sick.

anyone who was targeted to these people simply appears to be 1 of the many mentally ill you supposed to just ignore.

It means that Harvard MIT all these colleges all these hospitals and the Commonwealth of Massachusetts can do all the  human experimentation they want to people and all these people who  should care aren't going to. is there trains to believe that everyone he's homeless and looks like you're having problems is merely mentally ill.

The Commonwealth Is Evil At Its Core

Boston id so miserable and the people are on average very greedy and evil. They hide behind being good but Boston and Cambridge are at their core they are evil. The main power structure is evil, from way back.

Politicians Arent Just Marketing Sexy Anymore-Now They Are Metal Fans

http://abaldwin360.tumblr.com/post/20531297276/obama-is-a-metalhead-responds-to-dave-mustaines

http://politics.blogs.foxnews.com/2012/09/01/egghead-metalhead

I find this disturbing, confusing and frightening...and now definitely want to leave the US.

Seems Russia has a metalhead candidate as well.

Is there any place to rebel safely away from squares, normals and straights stealing our clothes, fashions, music or attitudes? Would tattoos be popular at all if the average citizen living as a poser couldn't have them removed? Or ensure the artist will make their arms covered completely in generic wallpaper like drawings but then stop right at the work shirt lines of collar, sleeve or wrist?

Personally i am sick of the posers and weekend warriors with their Harley's going around in society acting like they are cool becuz theyve co-opted and stolen studff from underground scenes where people really suffer to have such things be created.

This nonsense started in the mid to late 90s and i am sick of it. Now theres no place to go to have an underground scene and if u do it cant have time to grow in privacy to evolve into something great and solid.

This sucks.

Hurry up and move your yuppie asses to Mars taking Sir Richard's space shuttles so the truly hip cool edgy creative insane people can have a world of our own back again.

Assh*les.

Theres Been Alot Of Forced Making Peace Lately

Whenever i get somewhere that is out of cell range I notice that the content lately consists of making me feel like my blog isnt important, pushing the idea that no one is going to believe me,  a constant forced sense of peace making as in no anger or resentment about what had happened to destroy my life, when i think about going to at least see about lawyers, there's an immediate block due to reasons like no one is going to help me, how can i choose from so many people to know who to trust, that the statute of limitations probably ran out on stuff I  IS believable i cud sue for. And a very strong campaign to take away my strong sense of individal power and caring alot aboit what othrs think.

Theres been alot less tactics and perps doing aggressive stuff and alot more head hanging and seeming to make fun of me.

Which of course will fuel the state of mind of caring what others think.

Before all i cared about was writing my book. It seems the system wants me to care about my future...but that IS my future.

They want mw to believe wroting a book is a useless unfullfilling action.

Its simple enough: if no lawyers will help i leave the country next election. Its that simple and if Romney gets in I leave anyway.

These ideas and brain wash are exclusive to around Harvard Sq. Not so much so in Central where of course I get gang stalked more becuz the tech is somehow less effective. This phase seems very intent on sapping my anger about what happened and my intensity, my belief in myself and what i am doing. That no one cares and no one reads my blog, which perps tried in person before but I never bought into it. They also seem intent on taking my anger and making sure I dont use it contructively any longer but have it effect my behvior publicly. Thus trying to take away my centeredness and focus.

It Looks So Bleak So Why Do I Feel So Sure?

Been alot of just surviving lately. My health is very in question now. Its hard to decide to leave and travel or just leave the country or stay and push to get healthcare no matter how hard I am targeted.

And I am being interfaced so constantly that I now cant really tell its interface. I probably havent had a proper rest in far too long.

Its difficult to be THIS expendable. I mean, so many people involved in this consider me to be very unimportant. I can tell. Its as if I am just left out here to wither away. The only thing I can think of is to try to go to another nation, a homeland of one of my ancestors and perhaps things will be different there. The culture will be different. Becuz everything here is very...uninhabitable now. Its as if the whole world has just left me behind and I am supposed to accept this.

The same things keep happening and all I can do is learn to work around it. Usually the environment here is very bad. Its probably chemtrails as I notice that I am dulled mentally and emotionally and all I can do is walk through life slowly being brainwashed into being 'good'. Its really a lobotomy. It feels like being made harmless and nice and 'good' the way someone is when they get the icepick through the temple.
It rained heavily last night and this morning and yesterday and of course this always clears up the environment so I can think straight long enough to see through the influence.

One odd thing is that coming to Harvard Sq a few days ago after being away I noted when I hit the street from the train station that I got this feeling of sickness. Like when someone with a cold gets up in your face and you can tell they are going to get you sick. You feel it in your nose.

Generally in Harvard I have experienced heart problems last few months along with this low level sick-cold feeling. This goes away when in the MIT building with decent ventalation and protection.
Its ironic that there are little machines down in the train stations to test the air, when obviously they should be testing the air quality outside the station LOL.

Ive always believed this area gets dosed with alot of GOOD covert things, like resistance to things we dont know about or effect the rest of the country.

But Boston and Cambridge are changing. It seems by the actions and events lately that the country generally especially Liberal areas is preparing for Romney to get in or they are simply trying to get the numbers of homeless down....or the population down generally. Or the poor or weak or sickly. Something...I cant tell what but things seem bleaker than they ever did, yet somehow I am stronger and more aware of whats going on than ever. Perhaps I have to be now.

I think that no matter what is going to happen, there are a few of us that something, someone somewhere wants to survive. Perhaps being guided to go to a location that seems ridiculous isnt so far fetched after all considering whats looming. I wquld just leave if it wasnt for my health issue which requires me to stay in one place, not exert myself and get an ok for being healthy enough to travel.

Mock Court Tv Shows Part Of The Problem Of Mobbing

There are the crosses behind retired Judge, now tv judge Mathis. Seperation of church and state?

I dont want the black communties ties to the Christian church brought into a court of law, dont know about you. According to most EuroAmericans who KNOW the history of the church in Europe they are  responsible  for  more torture, SLAVERY, prostituion, child molestation and destruction of indigenous peoples and pagan European cultures than any other force in history.

I dont want  the  black  community's short sighted views of history, only focused on THEIR OWN history, to influence the American law system. This is why  there  is  supposed to b a seperation of church and state becuz all people's history and experience are different.

The gullible masses view these shows and then think things like gang stalking and mobbing are ok becuz they are ignorant enough to believe or think they are clever enough to hide behind Cause Stalking instead of what the laws of our country  and international laws are supposed to be.

Court TV Shows Mock American Justice System and Serve As Cruel Entertainment, Also Brainwashing For The Masses

http://www.politicalforum.com/law-justice/223434-judge-judy-moral-decline-capitalism.html

There is a reason stupid people are fed this bullshit. So they become desensitized, are not familiar with the true nature of the American law system and these shows serve to beat down and control the poor, ignorant and underclass.

Simple.

Judy specifically is a Zionist so right there shes not representative of the truly American value system.

The black male tv judge, if u look close enough, the stained glass behind his bench is in the SHAPE OF CHRISTIAN CROSSES. 

Then theres the former cop white male judge, who expresess his former vocation quite obviously in his manner behind the bench.

The Latino female judge isnt any better though the least annoying.

All these people serve to be judgemetal supposed moralists instead of simply doing their jobs as judges in courts of law.

I dont need or want a person in authority who is firm  yet warm  and  fuzzy underneath.

This ploy and personality type is a popular American con job that typical Americans seem to fall for.

Once again its important to baby Americans and make them feel protected instead of make them grow up and face the reality of true individual and social responsibility.

Attempt At Possible NLP Out In Harvard While Resting

Went to sleep waiting for my friend whos my sleep companion.

This older guy whos new out here seems interesting to talk to so I tell my younger acquaintance so, they start conversation. I begin falling asleep mostly due to taking two Benadryls from eating something i had slight allergic reaction to.

As i begin lulling off their conversation turns to the young female saying sanity is relative and how does one define it?

This was harmless enough. The older man then turns the conversation more specific by saying that some people out here are nice but they see things in patterns. The mind making things into patterns, that its fun for the human mind to do this. He weaves his words carefully as the educated do and she simply starts bringing up paranoia.  You could tell from her voice that she is doing so in response to his SUGGESTION, that she wants to fit in, be accepted. Early on in the exchange she disagreed with him on something and he responded with firm but subtle pressure to disagree, mostly to push his point through. She argued like 21 year olds do with vigor and speed. It was about the text book definition of insanitary originally. She claimed it was doing the same thing repeatedly expexting different results. He responded that it was not the TEXT BOOK definition. Personally it sounded like someone raised in the system repeating it's recovery culture phrases talking to a psuedo intellectual. Lol.

He claimed that definition was just a  joke. He used) the term "we". We use it as a joke. Never a good sign in an arguement or discussion.

So by the end of his leading the content of conversation to vaguely talk about specific paranoids out here who see things in patterns she was agreeing and finally simply referred to it as paranoia.

One has to remember alot of men who are homeless are child molesters. Sex offenders especially pedos are extremely good at manipulation especially of the mind and in controlling conversations or situations.

Also one has to remember that anyone who worships the Harvard/MIT elitist culture even if its the Leftist end of it is going to be in on Cambridge and the elite school's dirty little secret of gang stalking and probabky any involvement in classified projects like MK Ultra etc.

All I know is documentation proves Harvard and MIT were funded to be part of unethical human experimentation. I also know that no such documentstion exists that labels me insane, mentally ill or paranoid. I also make sure i dont talk about my activism out here.

Its also well known that the Cambridge cops ars crooked, like taking payoffs from people like my former friend and career criminal, as well as people out here are often in trouble with the law, have substance abuse issues etc etc. 

I cannot afford to let anyone change my mind from what I know to be true. Unlike my young friend, being accepted is not so important as to deny the truth. She as well as many others out here  probably doesnt even know any better.

It ALL sounds like paranoia if one isnt properly associated with the subject matter.

And how clever to have such a conversation around a person who is juuuust entering sleep, perhaps still able to hear the conversation, perhaps subconsciously.

Why its enough to make a person paranoid. Lol.

I know damn well the entire city of Cambridge and surrounding areas especially places like Brighton KNOWS what went on. A great majority of people here know what they did and whats been done to me.

Its a little game we play each day and the perps give me  continued demotivational tactics daily to try to keep me under control  for another day so no lawyers get contscted nor the book gets worked on.

I ignore them along with all the doubters out here who are either jealous, sexist, pedos or in with crooked cops or will do anything to protect their beloved elitist universities and the hospitals connected to them, most major research hospitals for the USA.

I still enjoy my young friend's company but the fact remains none of the people I meet traveling or squatting are connected to my dealing with the issues surrounding my mother's documented connection to MK Ultra.

The system thinks it can cover up what its done to me forever.

Good luck with that.

Why Is It A Big Deal To Travel To The North Shore To Get One Item Only Available There??

Sheesh. All I wanted was this one sweatshirt hoodie that i needed to pick up in that particular store location becuz local stores didnt have it due to students returning. It is real long on me and after years of hoodies that ride up on my back when i am outside somewhere and cold this appealed to me. And itnactually looks good as now Ive gained weight per usial being in MA. And its the ONLY jacket i will wear and own for likely a year or two at the least. Might  as well get something specific u really like. How often do most Westerners buy a new jacket and how many do they own? Hmph I think i do pretty well livng below the poverty line. Amd I am not shy about panhandling or getting something from a shelter. Most people couldnt pull this off, I know that. I am not most people and this is my job. Not anyone elses. No matter.how many people do not take anything i write seriously, its not my concern. I am supposed to write that book and anyone interested can read it or not its not my concern as to what people do with the info after that. The fact that any part of humanity doesnt take non lethal weapons, HAARP or any of this seriously is insane enough on their part--who CARES what those people think. And I am trying to buy a pocket atlas. Found one once in Cuba NM gas station but cant seem to locate one in any bookstores I come across. I know one day soon I might ditch this phone or not have GPS. Screw tech. Besides, my new companion needs to learn to use a compass and maps. Everyone should know how and people should know how to do thjngs manually.

Leaving Might Be Best For Safety

If people here are so brainwashed and stupid that they actually believe things like I deserve to be tormented and die or denied a life or that I am making alot of this up or being melodramatic then it might be safest to just go.

  People realizing I truly am sick due to my liver starting to scar or damages from being targeted for years only when I am totally debilitated is going to  be  too late for me. I am too much of a survivalist to allow that to happen or care what people think.

However lately Ive been targeted to care too much what people think. Like to focus on that exclusively which of course takes away my abilty to forge ahead to get my book written.  Its as if all internal drives are being blocked, altered or cloaked from me so I cant use them.

One Clear Normal Day On Holidays Is Not Enough To Get Anything Done Or Repair Health Damage Fully

MIT has made their Athena computers for login only now. I depended on them to work when libraries were closed. I guess they didn't appreciate my using their computers to expose alot of GS that involves them. Cant blame them I suppose.

All around things are getting cut off and houseless or poor people are having access closed to us, even in places that used to be Liberal.

Its very scary. It seems like the system and the public want to isolate themselves from  any and all social ills rather than live among them.  Many people realize dissidents are being targeted but it depends on if they approve of that or not-perhaps they would go  along with it anyway. Everyone else is just buying into the hate and scapegoating of such social problems and becuz they cant or wont control the banks, govt, private sector etc they can at least feel they can control something wrong with the world. Many truly believe in the NWO deception, that it will create a better world.

Its unthinkable that many people seem to want me to just forget about what happened and get a job. Its really irresponsible and demented.

Ive had to learn the hard way that America has become very sick and demented generally. And theres no recovery from this in sight. The public wil seek to isolate themselves more and more from reality instead of fixing whats wrong and returning to nature and normalcy.

Theyve got the public completely under control now. I wouldnt be surprised if some sort of mark of the beast type scenerio were to take place soon, minus the religious drama of course, but yes-something where you can only b par of society then if you take on a tag of some sort. Since the public doesnt realize whats wrong even now or are in agreement with whats  going on, they probably will be very easy to convince of something like this.

I am basically being given the ideation that America is hopeless and I can never get justice here or even a moments peace so I should now go overseas. That soon America will change even more drastically and people like me will be more marginalized and shunned by society.

To me this means Romney will get elected. Yet these changes over this year indicate that if Obama is re elected then there will be new changes for his second term like these. Same happened with Clinton. His second term was so obviously simply getting ready for Bush and 9-11.  Clinton's administration started pulling alot of things out from under us then. Since 1995 it seemed.

The mainstream public have always sucked in many ways to people who are naturally alternative. But part of the freedom of America was that there were places to hide from them and their horrid culture. 

Our country has now made it impossible to afford to live or find alternative culture if that is what one gravitates to. It shouldn't be that only the rich get to  escape the mainstream.

Now you've got an entire generstion of people who actually firmly believe that rebellion against the system as its laid out by authority is either mental illness or terrorism.  The situation is impossible.

In the past year the targeting of me and/or circumstances I have  to live in have made me physically ill and unable to express myself properly, work on my book or even seek proper health  care.

I guess no one in America cares about an older woman who is dirt poor with no children who has alot to say about high level corruption.

If America wanted to change they would have by now. Thats the point. They havent, so they are hopeless.

Whats amazing to me is I am being totally shut out now and not even allowed to get lawyers to sue and get justice for what IS believable.

They kept me from going to authorities or lawyers in the beginning when I could have gotten help and when it would have been very incriminating to them especially locally during the federal investigation and now its probably  too late.

Remember though part of Mind War as in psy ops is to make the enemy think the war is already lost. Or that the other side has already won. I mght have legal recourse still but I am being controlled and blocked so hard and constant that I cant seek help at all  now. Just months ago I at least wouldve been capable of getting a lawyer to speak to. Now I cant even function normally or express myself truthfully. Notice how now the content of my writing consists of bitching about blacks and Jews (Mel Gibson got targeted after going up against the Massachusetts miltary indusrial complex also its suspected with a derogatory movie he made.) and ranting hateful remarks about America.

Its all to get me to leave the US and go to Europe whwre then I will probabky be framed up as a terrorist or something else.

Also everyone knows Ive been kept ignorant all my life  and dont really understand my legal rights or how to defend myself or where or how to seek help. I keep thinking about getting a lawyer but dont understand how to find one or how to find out who to trust with multiple subject matter involved. (Local crooked cops, organized crime and the higher up stuff-whos going to help ME and not the more powerful bad guys??).

None of it makes sense or seems possible. This is why I just want to tell everything in my book instead. At least then everyone who cares to know can see all the info right in front of them.  Its the next best thing to getting actual justice through the courts. I dont even think such a thing is  possible.

No one cares anyway. Everyone  seems to  want  things to have the outcome that is right now. When enough humans agree on a reality it becomes real even if its totally wrong, unjust, lies or destructive to humanity. Just look at religion-any god(s) that ever existed only  did so becuz human beings believed in them.

This is where the public mob get alot of their power  from even if its not consciously known to them-human mental or psychic powers. When working collectively humans can manifest many things or alter reality...and unfortunately steamroll over one truthful person's testimony. The powers that be use this power  of humans to their own advantage for their own agenda, which is why its so important to deny such a thing exists and have people involved in either religion or psychiatry. Note that psychiatry will not mess with religious belief even though it meets all the criteria for mental 'disorders'. (Also largely bullshit).

Ive noticed that PTSD is labeled a 'disorder'. Which is incorrect. If the human mind or body responds to life lived in this way then NATURE wired us this way and there is nothing DISorderly about it. It surely becomes inconvenient to social order and order of things back in the civiized world. If you dont want shell shock or reactions of trauma from people being in wars then stop having wars. Labeling this a disorder means its inconvenient to a false man made reality where people dont want to have the reality of war included in their daily lives.

More bullshit more lies more deceptions.

Its obvious that I am being so heavily targeted that my health is suffering severely now and I am incapable of doing anything other than rant and be obnoxious on these blogs. I try to keep OnGangStalking just informative but thats hard now too.

I am genuinely made into A TOTALLY DIFFERENT PERSON  than who I really am by being targeted and harassed daily. What do I do now?

Over the past few months Ive become genuinely confused about what the right thing to do is. It keeps occuring to me that leaving the country is the only way out.

Labor Day 2012- Once Again Another Day Off From Being Targeted

Whew! Its a holiday. One day at least of normalcy.

Lately being targeted and being in Cambridge, an area with alot of electromag pollution (and powerful entities eager to destroy TIs) has made it impossible to work, function and even keep from being discredited.

I cant seem to get doctor's appointments going here. I recemtly canceled everything-and my hewlth conditions are worsening.

Theyve been becoming a hinderance to my traveling and general health for past year and a half now. Ever since the fallout from Japan's nuclear plant during the tsunami ive had health issues and prior symptoms worsen. Strangely its worse in the northeast, why i dont know. Im sorry I havent published your comments I havent been able to focus much on anything but just surviving daily. I certainly cant think straight or produce meaningful work under current conditions. I spend most of my time reacting to what seems to be a constant interface. All day and night long, its terrible. I might actually get work done or contact lawyers etc if I was somewhere that I could sleep very late and be awake from 12 midnight to six a.m. when the influence seems to subside, per usual. (Maybe its de to there being many nuclear plants in this area or there was an accident here or leak they arent admitting to. Plant in NH, VT and elsewhere I believe.)

Whats More Dangerous? The Wise Lone Wolf Or The Rabid Sheep?

Unfortunately talking and writing about all that has happened especially during that era is only going to make extremely fucked up people like my family and locals feel wonderful and jacked up on power about what happened.

Victims of gang stalking can claim that the people involved are weak assholes all they want. Even though its true, the people's mob still has destroyed the individual's life and continues to keep them down.

One of the greatest rationales these assholes have is that the TI might have many talents and nine lives etc and can 'spare' to be fucked over and destroyed almost to their mortal death. One has to remember these people have no concept of how deep life and death is and have little care for anyone's other than their own and those they know well. They also dont respect things by understanding true right and wrong but only respect or disrespect things authority tells them to.

America is a young country full of people of foriegn descent who have lost all wisdom from their immigrant ancestors.

America has become just a destroyer.  Its founded on genoicide, death, thievery, broken treaties, lawlessness  and destruction anyway. Its been sold off by now and doesn't even exist in its past form.

Brainwashed human animals are extremely dangerous. And I dont think any of us take that as seriously as we should. Brainwashed from the herd mentality and outside forces that is. Ironically, Survivors have to be self actualized and aware to survive programming and de programming so are less dangerous to their fellow man.

Arlington MA Bus stop

Me and road dog with back packs at a busbstop.Arlington pd cruiser #7 just happens to show up and parks right  at end of street facing us not long after we arrive.

The officer looks like the kind of 70s sleazeball one could be in the 70s and still look cool somehow putting on a lousy swagger strut.

After  i walk by the car the throw away trash he decides to get out of cruiser himself as i stand once again at bus stop.

He then either looks at what i threw away in barrel or threw something away himself i couldnt tell as that exact moment my back was turned.

He then struts over to talk to a shop owner and he nods in our direction and she then looks over also. He continues to speak with her  while facing in our direction sunglasses on of course.

Is that all the cops had to do during Bush was gang stalk certain people so they would then easily fit the criteria for twrrorist threats and they could use up and keep getting all that lovely Homeland money??

As well as now  they can keep an eye on and control the people THEY KNOW they covertly targeted into homelessness to begin with.

He left right before the bus arrived. Communities across the nation have scammed the fed in this way and the public knoww it. They see it as a way of keeping their communities alive and funded. They dont care qbout the victms becuz their ignorant stupid commoner asses have deemed each Target worthless to society in some way. The public mob always finds its way around law and order by coöperating with corrupt authorities locally or regionally. This is why 9-11 is a joke. From much of my experience the American public knew that the anti terror hysteria and Security Theater were money making scams for towns, cities etc. And much of this was used to satisfy the needs of organized crime or other corrupt power.