Something about Harvard Sq and being outside generally is kicking my ass.
Had an outburst, racial in nature as usual. Another result of my not getting away this year to another location has been that I'm extremely stressed from dealing with the stupidity unique to the Boston/Cambridge.
Being harassed and challenged constantly by the two major demographics of affluent, bratty young people (probably new money becuz they behave with little class and alot of privilege) as well as thier component, the African American population here is usually something that traditionally causes me to meltdown frequently as well as render my nerves frayed. Add to that the mold and air pollution in the inner city area and I am really screwed. Its showing too, the wear from not traveling this year.
It was well deserved but again, we are talking about another success in this area for discrediting me and making me both look nuts and literally driving me nuts.
Was very effected this morning by everything thats been going on I posted last night on ONGS. Upset and thats rare, that this upsets me. Also haunted by the constant feeling that something is going to go down here soon in the states and...one wants to be strategically placed in order to fare best within those upcoming circumstances..lets just say.
Very effected this morning by the gang stalking thats become more intense last week or so and constant, not able to focus properly under duress. Still havent filed police reports with internal affairs-'mistakenly' threw away notebook today after buying new one that had my rendition of what occurred that morning in NOV last year. Note that this campaign worsened as Ive tried to file a police report for the detective harassment.
(I'll just f*ckin do it again and from memory this time.)
I was kind of aware the gs might intensify this week as THE RED SOX started playing again and as we all know, Red Sox Nation are so friendly with the CIA that they have been documented to lend out thier private jets for interrogation runs. The perps have always made sure I was harassed thoroughly as well as other homeless people to protect thier little tourist business.
Not that pro sports in America isnt totally sexist anyway with no problem in supporting the most abusive forms of male oppression, violence and of course the patriarchy. Its also a way of keeping the public bonded to thier city, region and country through team loyalty as well as getting women to emulate male stupidity (that excludes females) as well as making men controllable, bonded and made to feel focused on, special and omnipotent.
Its eerie the way Sox fans are unified in thier hatred of me and thier collective refusal to give me anything while panhandling just stupid looks or dirty ones. But they will gladly support the black crackhead, the old drunk guy or whoever- especially if the person is smart enough to wear a piece of clothing that identifies them as Red Sox fans.
Ive noticed that Sox fans are the most sociopathic, obnoxious snobs who somehow actually believe they have some sort of power in the world simply by virtue of their cult..I mean gang..I mean team affiliations. Celtic fans are second most obnoxious and the best, well behaved, fun and most handsome are Bruins fans. Becuz hockey is awesome and for real men anyway. WTF is baseball? Snooooze.
It seems Sox fans feign the sophistication and yearn for the conservative cool of the golf sport but in the end are just overweight YUPpie meatheads who come in for games from the suburbs that somehow are so lacking in any understanding of real wealth, that their obvious middle class values betray them by they choosing snobbery instead of any sense of class that comes with affluence.
The 'safe' jocks is what I call them. Sheeple jocks. This explains my natural leanings towards approving of the masculinity of Bruins fans over the douches that come to Fenway for Red Sox Terrorist Nation.
You want to be badass sports fans and you believe you are superior becuz you can afford a ticket in this day and age when regular people cant get into games but like what Fenway and the Sox have become themselves you are nothing more than a reflection of corporate culture in America that has co-opted 'edgy' from truly risk taking, bad ass cultures.
Kind of like the weekend warrior biker douchebags that do gang stalking when they decide to sport thier Harley gear. Only when not at at office of course.