I am probably underestimating the power of.this system in the USA and the nature of this culture altogether.
Daily now I get flashes within my mind's eye of the people supposedly involved in this, those that are really responsible for destroying my life. It'd mostly some of Jake's powerful mentors, my mother and other local people.
This system especially wants me to hurry up and tell what I know about my mother and her part in this.
And I never considered that locally the cops could use locals as a means of control. I am just sick of thinking about the cops in MA. Especially the original precincts that were involved. I just don't care..is it actually possible that the police forces of the United States of America are working in conspiracy? Or are they simply providing local support for what is essentially the work of larger more powerful state actor?
I suppose I am supposed to realize at some point that I will never be left alone and that an entire nation has been brainwashed to percieve me a certain way and treat me a certain way.
That the USA can't be trusted. That when you finally outgrow American culture that you cannot go home again. America as it is and as it functions realistically is not available for you any longer...which is why I am probably being pushed to leave the US.
It seems that once yer out here its over. People say America is a forgiving country but it doesn't seem so. I think it depends on who we are talking about.
Sure the US took in Sarah Fergusen after scandal but that's becuz America loves celebs and tarnished royalty are brought down just enough to be on a level they can grasp. In my case however I was not in any position that Americans would admire or want to assist in a fall from out of spite. Many seem to misunderstand and despise me from the get go. They honestly believe that these new technologies provide a means of easy control over the poor as well as us being playthings for them. That people can be made into toys.
I really want to have the faith in other humans to believe that I am simply surrounded by perps so regularly due to not having the resources to escape, that it simply appears as if everybody is in on this...that if I wrote books or gave lectures that people would hear me that are NOT in on it.
Damn it..this is a really expensive 'secret govt project' as my dad put it (which is what got him labeled allegedly).
