(Written Sept 1st 2010)
Was around downtown Boston, Park St station.
Came to the realization today that Bostonians are still stuck on money = power as final word on human value.
I had money I put down on the counter at a store, so I could put my money onto another account. I could feel this black woman behind me emote this reaction, like pure hatred mixed with surprise. I then realized that Boston is hopeless. They will never grow up, they will never change. Especially Boston opposed to Cambridge. And downtown Boston specifically.
I realized how Boston racial issues has changes but some attitudes stay the same.
Many African Americans have always been and I think always will be especially cruel, jealous, competitive and very into the idea of destroying someone like me becuz I had what it took to get out of my situation.
I recalled how Boston never could get past money = power. This is why everyone here who is poor is so damn trapped and downtrodden always whining about how "this place sucks". Then f*ckin leave then. Thats what I did. It doesnt matter what race you are. There are black traveling kids too you know.
I want to start a special class for inner city youth- youth anywhere, that lets them know that there IS a way out of the dead end cities or even the system in general. There will be kids from every demographic, every race, every city state and town that are natural nomads that are just lost in the 'legit' system and don't realize it. Its they that I want to appeal to.
The psychology of being stuck in a certain culture is so strong that you may not understand there is an alternative way to live until, like me in my 30's where my natural lifelong urge to travel rescued me from persecution from my govt, my community and the betrayal of family, lovers, business associates and friends.
Adults may benefit too, if they can get over the judgments that come more often with age about what is expected of one in American society.
America is like Australia or Ireland was years ago. I think many Americans are just leaving. Traveling or relocating, leaving as our ancestors did Europe in search of something else, a new way of life, a new culture, or different opportunities.
It stands to reason that if you come from people that had the initiative to leave their homeland then you can do it too. And yes I understand that statement is in bad taste for African Americans as many of their ancestors did not leave willingly but to stay in such an unhappy situation just does not make sense. There has got to be some natural nomads in the community somewhere.
It has to lose its stigma as 'homeless' or other such bullshit. Its perfectly logical with what is going on now in this country that many people would want to leave. The place is a horror show in so many ways.
Its true that I would not be traveling this way, unless I had to. I would have liked to have built something or had a base of operations first then traveled as part of a job of some kind. That is what is so painful is having to be on the road instead of being able to build something. This is part of the torture of organized stalking and harassment.
I was talking about downtown Boston becuz I want other TI's to know that I experience alot of black gang stalking and set ups in downtown Boston as well as U Mass Boston. That whole area that they consider 'their' territory. Who says there is no black conspiracy. I would love to just leave it at that but there are so many instances of being gang stalked by other kinds of people. It wasnt blacks in Baltimore Ohio that's for sure. There probably aren't any there at all. Small farming town- most overt gang stalking I have ever seen in my life.
So I was set up today to lose it by telling off some older black guy. He invaded my space as i was turned around dealing with some finances with my bank cards out over the phone. He leaned over my left shoulder and right into my personal space, saying "excuse me" while looking at what I was doing. When I moved to the other side then told him off he said "I said excuse me". I asked him if all he wanted was the box on the wall that had a ledge to it to put his stuff on to fix his jacket. The whole thing was so obnoxious. Of course right when I told him off a young black girl was right there with her cell phone playing what seemed like guarding the situation. I scared him off, then finished with saying that black dudes piss me off and something not nice about getting a syringe with my hep c blood for such future emergencies as a way to handle all offenders properly. I hadnt rested for the month yet by taking a day at a cheap hostel and was running ragged.
Now I realized after that it was at the top of the stairs in the MBTA so there is a camera right there. It was the perfect spot to antagonize me so I would react and be caught on camera. Either for securities personal entertainment or more footage to prove how dangerous and crazy I am as well as probably a terrorist. Strangely when I mentioned Hep C the black girl seemed to emote sympathy. Why would she emote sympathy for someone she did not know or was not connected to.
You the TI have got to be realistic about blacks being part of covert operations in the USA historically for hundreds of years. And they are the perfect provocateurs as society sees them as the ones underprivileged and disadvantaged so they could not possibly be connected to the oppressive power structure doing its covert dirty work. Also the public are stupid as well as racist and dont realize it: they truly believe that blacks are not smart enough on the whole to be capable of covert ops. I am not racist, I just dont put up with bullshit as well as I have been being harassed my whole life by blacks in this city- as in gang stalking but also socially and class wise the way Boston is set up. Growing up during forced integration and bussing in the 70's was a nightmare but no one wants to answer for that here. It turned Boston into a war zone, and people like Jake's parents who vote on such things to experiment with our lives, simply sent thier children to Weston to avoid the situation when it came to thier towns. Boston screws up alot of sh*t by experimenting with people's lives and never answers for it..they are trying to help remember. They are oh so good, helpful and Democratic and liberal. There is reason I prefer Texas and after hating myself and this city all my life I finally understand why: personal power, personal responsibility and individual choices. If I wasnt targeted I would've been off the dole by now. The system knows that which is why they have to keep me down all my life. So I never look as if I was capable of accomplishing anything.
Blacks are instrumental to covert warfare here in Boston. For years black bus drivers were always getting me to react in public spaces just as today's possible set up did today. Jake is the first person to show me that its not normal to have so many people mistreat you in public on a daily basis like that. I grew up seeing my mother harassed and kept down as well as myself so it never occurred to me that there was any other way of life.
My freaking out all the time on people was due to stress.
On the train I think back to many instances in my 20's where creepy..I mean like Eddie Cox/Hand creepy. I mean it doesnt get any creepier.. watching, psyching me out on the train. I would just sit there and not understand why I was so nervous, why I was reeling from stress.
You have to understand that the stalking and harassment is supposed to be to manage mind controlled slaves and to cause them to eventually suicide once they get to a certain age. They just traumatize, abuse and hurt the person so consistently that they never recover. The system makes sure that they do not recover. They just die after lives of deep unhappiness and pure sorrow, never understanding anything else. This is why we are deemed mind controlled SLAVES. Its not just the way programming works. Its that we are never allowed to go beyond enslavement in this world.
And I wouldnt have even known the difference unless all that bullshit happened during Bush. I often wonder if I am right in it seeming that Bush actually in some way gave us freedom we never would have had under any other administration due to being so attacked that many of us either died or woke up and fought to live.
There are people that are very connected to mind control slavery and MK Ultra for subjects my age: George Bush ('Sr' if you will) and Michael Aquino or at least some connection to a cult very similar to his. Strangely its as if things very connected to these men and thier people are what has prompted many slaves to wake up and escape destruction. I cant understand it. Is it part of the NWO that we should wake up and fight? Is it a part of thier programming AND ours? These men are getting up there in years. Could they have decided to take some responsibility for their 'children' from 30 years ago? Its obvious that this new era is very different in the way that people deal with things. In fact it may seem much better but I have doubts. Its so whitewashed. As if its supposed to be so much better, so much healthier, so much progress made- but everyone is downtrodden, miserable and its very crushing of the human spirit. Its like having a right to be happy is not thought of anymore.
People have a right to be happy. 'War' with a power structure shouldn't last this long..the problem is that everyone knows we are living in a holding pattern. A virtual hell and its totally against social norms to say so, unless you want to be looked at as some sort of whiner or passe. Its passe to care about things, to fight corruption.
Dont you realize that the rich survive these things? That its all for our collective safety? But its nothing more than ongoing psychological warfare with the public.
And as far as racism- this war. No one has time for niceties or PC when they are targeted. Blacks that are in on this for thier own reasons are just as bad as sexist white males who seem to have a collective reason for being in on my harassment. Each demographic of perps seems to believe that it will help their personal cause whatever it is. Black power in society, keeping women down or punishing women for destroying society, and women have thier own reasons for being into targeting someone like me as well.
There are plenty of African Americans that are of help to me and know whats up and that the whole thing sucks. I dont include them in my hatred. Becuz they are a positive force. And if they are also targeted then they are one of us- Targeted Individuals.
The reality of blacks being very useful to the system due to thier 'unseen' status is very reminiscent of Sherlock Holmes using street kids or that population to watch people, trail someone or deliver messages undetected. Its a population that is everywhere but no one takes a second thought. Also blacks for all their culture being broadcast everywhere and really taking hostages from the poor white communities- brainwashing them really- for all their media presence I dont really think that many whites truly understand blacks, their culture or its nuances. Their culture still holds alot of mystery for outsiders and myth. That may attract people to it but it is also very very valuable in covert warfare.
You have to be realistic about ever faction of the opposing forces that is sent your way. The greatest obstacle is that no one believes gang stalking exists or programming or RA either. And the system has taken steps as of many victims coming forward to deny all existence of RA. They made a panic out of it- they were smart. This caused such a backlash that now no one will dare touch any cases.
And its obvious that many cities in the US are now totally managed by behavior modification/ mind control (hypnotic) technologies. Its as simple as building on the old patented anti theft subliminal tech that was used in stores for years.
I also believe from experience that there exists a network to monitor people and specifically TI's by using every camera available in public and retail spaces. It may also be a more sophisticated trick like satellite or like in the batman movie where the feedback from all cell phones was patched together to form a mapping out of the area within the parameters created by those cell phones.
I was busy today and will do a post on TI's feeling of being watched especially in major cities. There is definitely something to this. Why would I feel very watched and targeted while in a corporate chain store then when I exit those conditions are lifted? Again mental illness should not depend on geographic location or varying conditions like what building structures you are in.
TI's are very sensitive to these conditions (not mentally ill or paranoid) due to being stalked, harassed and classical conditioning being used. They are very aware that someone is messing with them, singling them out. IF there is brain damage present as in my case, one finds that along with those conditions, one becomes very sensitive to the tech and its content and affects.
If you notice over the years I have become very 'psychic' as far as being able to tell if someone is staring at me when I am resting with my eyes closed or feeling other peoples emotions. I believe that this may be the purpose of the experimentation. Recall that jackass in AZ who got me at the railroad tracks and told me that I knew what it was like to "be allowed to grow only very conditionally".
The system has to tell everyone we are crazy and claim we are nuts. The abuse is above and beyond destructive. Its unfathomable to most sane Americans. Only someone in war torn country or a country with torture present would ever understand what people like me have been through. This is why its so easy to get Americans to think the TI is just mentally ill. They dont want to believe that anything like this goes on in their country and even if they do they will just ignore it. Most Americans ignore the overt human rights abuses forget about the stuff they dont want to believe. They just are not a culture of people who care about anything anymore unless it pertains to interfering in thier high quality of life or thier safety on US soil.
The scary part is that the US wants everyone around the world to become just like them. It spells disaster for man kind in general if that happens. It is the scariest thing I have ever seen in my short and inexperienced life. The entire take over of the world by a culture that is totally brainwashed and now obsessed with money as life force or power. The only redeeming quality of American culture is the true freedoms we have. As in me being able to write this whereas in other countries I would have been overtly tortured by now or unable to express myself.
But covert actions that are destroying the USA as of lately are what could make those freedoms useless.
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I wrote that a few days ago. Today I lost it on this guy on the bus. Young kids today have a whole different set of rules. Men approach me that should not be approaching a woman in her late 30's. Its interesting that people mind thier own business nowadays when they should be doing something about certain issues or corruption but in very inappropriate ways they butt in or take initiative to be forward where years ago this was not considered socially acceptable. I do NOT like the new power dynamics in our society. Men are once again coddled, their worst behaviors tolerated, yet in many ways they are kept from being just men or acting in predictable male ways.
I saw an ad today for a TV show (A Family Like Ours?) where a wife and mother was chasing her son with a bottle in his mouth in diapers and the husband was in front of the baby in his underwear sucking a beer bottle just like the baby. Again women are conditioned to believe that they must be the adult or tolerate such behavior. I have seen so many women that have taken to feminism that tells them they should have it all and that consists of working AND being subjegated as a caretaker. They have also been conditioned that you must have it all not a choice. What was the point of the 60's or 70's? Its all been engineered right back again.
I note that young African American males are very much more forward than they used to be approaching women or interfering with two females having a conversation. That coddling in the 60's during the civil rights movements as well as tolerating that power won degenerating into 'bitches' this and 'hos' that has given them the idea that we are there to validate them, take care of them, tolerate them, and that we have no power of our own.
Women have royally screwed up by alienating not only other white women or even sistas- other women in general, out of a false created competitiveness among women in the US but have also aliented white men. African American males approach women nowadays as if they have some special privileged to waltz right into conversations, private space, personal solitude. What gives? Its very disrespectful. I find this more in SoCal and around the metro Boston area.
With my nerves being shot over years of harassment and the horrors of gang stalking as well as training myself to react fighting instead of thinking, which is something you learn while dealing with gs on little sleep..I have very little patients for any bs anymore. I find I have a zero tolerance towards disrespect or intrusion. Its very hard due to the younger generations perceiving the world very differently from myself.
I also have learned to destroy a potential info gathering session in the form of faux friendly conversation. And confrontation or men demanding anything of me is right off from the get go. I think they have collectively taken quiet enough by now. I just dont have anything left to give any man attention, coddling, sympathy, apologies for society at large or the situation they were born into.
I dont have children nor am I married becuz the woman in that ad for tv is a damn fool seriously. Having it all is one thing. I have NOTHING at all and still some people are blind to that.
I find myself very guarded and armored as well as with a jittery trigger finger when it comes to verbal or other kinds of defense of my space, time or standards for respect.
Most people never deal with gs in thier whole lives. The fighting that must be done to survive is incredible.
Its suspected that it may also be to finally get me to act out and screw myself with some sort of hate crime status or bias crime. Being female I am also in a protected class but the point of gang stalking is always smear. And to think they would stop even if the harassment has seemed to let up is foolish.
Understanding that the system wants to discredit and ruin your life as much as possible. You wouldnt believe the reactions I have gotten to my credit going from ghost to bad credit. The system believes that it has really ruined a persons life by ruining thier credit. That is how shallow and myopic the people in this system are behind all this nonsense. They have no comprehension of dying to win. All they understand is dirty tricks.
Here is an example of what the lib Dems will stoop to: http://www.canadafreepress.com/index.php/article/21522
How crazy PC is getting:http://www.lewrockwell.com/roberts/roberts16.html
It seems that the anti bias would be biased in itself.
Why do I expect nothing less in a country turned to diversion after diversion to protect the true war criminals and white collar crimes?
