I am traveling with a companion. As u know i am visiting places that i had visited before where i documented being horribly tormented.
I am finding that when I get outside Cambridge MA and go on the road traveling i become very aggressive due to how I'd been terrorized while traveling over the years by normal American intolerant bullshit towards female Travelers and also by Gang Stalking.
The way I had to travel also required bravety and aggression, boldness and self preservation.
I find these are not good qualities to travel with someone inexperienced, someone who doesnt know what they are doing. That frustrates me and then whats happened to me just keeps repeating itself constantly in the back of my mind, ESPECIALLY IN PLACES WHERE I HAVE DOCUMENTATION OF IT BEING A HEAVILY TARGETED AREA, SEEMINGLY MANAGED BY TECH OR AT LEAST WITH ALOT OF ELECTROMAGNETIC POLLUTION.
Portland ME, the downtown area, was awful last time I was here and its just as bad this time. U can feel it subside when u leave the downtown area especially over the bridge to S Portland. It's a constant feeling of being afraid of violence from locals as well as feeling uncomfortable in the area generally.
Traveling within New England has been difficult. Its an area with GS connected to MA closely it seems and there r few truck stops. Lots of Yankee rednecks like in NH outside Portsmouth who hate Travelers as well as just people who dont sem associated with the lifestyle.
Ive desperatey wanted to get a ride and just go West where after NY trucker culture and the REAL working class America are, people who are alot more familiar and tolerant of the traveler...or of me I cant always tell which.
This trip dealing with the New England branches of the GS network as well as ignorant, insulated Yankees, as well as what seems very effective and constant tech management Ive become so effected Ive turned on my companion as an abusive jerk. And it is so connected to continued GS and tech harassment in these areas as well as the history of it in the back of my mind that I cant seem to prevent it.
Im used to truck stops, wide open spaces and getting more assitance from people traveling than Ive experienced on this trip.
Its very hard being from a place and being attached to that place due to identifying it as home when as a PERSON, the character of that place totally doesnt suit u. Perhaps New England twenty or thirty years ago-the true and real New England I was somewhat comfortable with but this corporate, YUPpie, sold out, paranoid, stuck up, post 9-11 piece of shit is unrecognizable to me. Its become so unfriendly and uptight its unbelievable. The last thing uptight worry wart New England Yankees needed was any reasons to become totally paranoid, stuck up and anymore isolated, ignorant or obsessed with status (now consumerism) than they already were.
My home is a warzone and I have to act normal. This is ridiculous.
I dont know if my companion is in on whats going on or neutral. I seem to just b taking out on him the nerves I probably wud have expressed looking crazy like the perps want by acting out when they harass me.
Its unbelievwble what this country has turned into.
