“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” --Maya Angelou

Thursday, July 18, 2013

The Latest Misery Has Brought Me Back To My Goals

Staying with a person i thought was trustworthy. He's probably one.of those compliant citizens who doesnt have much to gain or lose by being a perp so i fell for his seeming like he was a genuine ally.

I am in a hard place emotionally due to having a health procedure. All i needed was a few days of intense support and partially this is his problem to. He couldnt do.it. As usual i have to go through this by myself like i have all my life.

I hate this country i hate its culture and i loathe Americans especially the younger generation.

This horrible situation has made me realize that if ever I had any misgivings about leaving the US I don't have any left now.

As long as I stay here I will be homeless and keep being forced to associate with people who are not on the same page as me. If you still live in the USA you cant be too upset with it or its policies.

Anyone who's truly disgusted has already left.

Sitting here watching the Simpsons like I used to do with my ex Jake.
I realize how shallow and self destructive our culture is. The show sucks. Its always sucked. It reflects how much we dont care about ourselves or classical art or decent music.

I wud rather be homeless and targeted in another country.

And i need to stop trying to stay in the US and pretending I can have a normal life with people who aren't NWO rebels.

Im sick of getting brainwashed into being silenced, into daily putting aside my goals as an activist.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

Seems Portland Hides Its Liberal Elitism-With Atypical Hick Behaviors

Yeah, the medical field is full of all kinds of assholes, serial killers (read a history book if you dont believe me how many killers have hid in this field. Even serial killing groups. Which explains alot about why the medical field would harbor people so pre disposed to being involved in 'gang stalking' a TI) and mostly people who are in the field becuz some expectation of them forced them to go into the field to begin with. A person who spends little time developing thier emotional maturity becuz thier education and career dont allow for it, who also is only in that career becuz they are fullfulling some family expectaion or status seeking IS GOING TO BE A DANGER TO OTHERS.

Rarely does our society psychologically profile professionals unless they draw the attention of the legal system etc. Usually they protect each other hoping that will not happen- it holds up the status quo. Try googling 'psychological profile of a policeman' and all you will get are ass kissing articles about how police utilize profiling in thier field AS PROFESSIONALS. 

If there was an independent study of the psych profiles of every kind of law enforcement including feds, covert agencies included, lawyers, judges, medical professionals of all kinds and most interesting- politicians, the public would be shocked (becuz they are stupid) at exactly what kind of people are running thier society- and thier lives.

The harassment and downright arrogance and disrespect in the northeast from professionals is more overt I guess as thats what I am used to.

I am noticing that in Liberal Elitist areas, the jerks are many, only smart people can spot it and they usually dont pick on anyone who isnt a threat to their face-its all about real and true power games in these rich areas with status. I have to say at least its done with some effort and they ensure its going to be very hard to sue- becuz of course like in my case, the other professionals in the city protect each other while they are collectively destroying a Targeted Individual. 

However in such areas, I notice that there are genuine class acts with moral backbone in these areas, this is where I have received most of my help in getting decent health care.

I am not so sure about this area. I have already had a bizarre experience at a Doctor Express where, though the docs were nice and much more willing to listen to me and be flexible with providing solutions I found acceptable for an issue, upon leaving my appointment yesterday, the doc actually touched my head and rubbed quite hard-like you would a dog or a child. He's a little flaky anyway which is why he's at a walk in probably instead of something bigger.

It doesnt matter becuz I got the medicine I potentaially need for my contidion, which is more than I got from Adventist urgent care or this hospital out east- Legacy, which I dont want to get involved in after dealing with them just once.

This article tells me further that there is a very careless sort of obnoxious assholedom among Portland's medical field-it seems that they believe that the citizens are far too stupid and powerless to fight against corruption or they not truly doing thier jobs.


Does that bs actually still work anywhere? Seems my love for this place for its hickness and not having the ills of a big city has its drawbacks. You mess with patients and you actually then lean on some Liberal crap about being in fear of your life from Right wing religious wackos? Who in our 21st century society would fall for that? Moreso what person from the north east- the land of various ethnic organized crime syndacates, corrupt cops and shameless old money- wouldnt see through that?

I am going to go to a good hospital here but I dearly miss the system in Boston...and UCSD which did right by me a few months ago. SoCal is unbearable however so its not worth it.

But whats the point in being in Boston if I cant get to my appointments nor can I get decent care becuz many hospitals not only know who I am but want to keep covering for the medical and academic's part in being part of gang stalking me and other Targets in that area and totally destroying our lives.

If any of the places and people I am going to even try any such bullshit on me here I am going to employ all my knowledge of the system from being from Boston to being a long time TI.

Seems the educated hicks here think they are smart. They also have a habit of not listening to a patient in a kind manner thats disarming thus effective, which of course one cannot allow to work in one's best interest.

Getting a head rub was a small price for getting what I wanted. Yes it was inappropriate and yes I could report it. But its seems this place has its own style of elitist assholedom among the professions and who am I to argue with my new host city?

We will just have to make it clear exactly whom they are dealing with and that bartering and persuading for services to be done correctly may include me having to charm, chat and push for things to get done but do not include any sort of fuckin shannanigins. 

Funny, in Liberal Elistist areas, for all thier evil bullshit- there are those that begrudgingly respect intellect and giule, as they are highly valued in places like Frisco, NY and to a smaller extent Boston. Out here it seems a straight game of 'I (professional), you nobody citizen. I have power, ugh ugh'.  Like no frills stupidity without any kind of nuances in the game or any intersting cues or sophistication.
Ahh, I miss the east coast establishment. They cant be beaten but thier games are much more interesting and have dimensions to them.

WTF is this shit out here? LEAVING EVIDENCE of messing with a patient  by drawing on them in marker? Probably becuz back home some Italian would 'get you' for it later either outright in your sleep or knows people (you dont know they know) who will serve Malotov cocktails at your home later that year, at night of course or your car will have difficulties- like inexplicably setting on fire etc or you they know people a little more sophisticated and suddenly youve got union problems or some sort of 'bad luck' as such.
African Americans back there are gonna be the ones to use the legal system against you and every other source they have there which is many and powerful. It doenst end the kinds of ethnicities back home that can fuck you up for such nonsense in various ways. Back home- abuse of power gains an equal measure of abuse of power. It seems to keep a balance.

Portland seems to hide its power structure. It is Liberal without the Elitism, seemingly. It is a 90's like environment where people can be laid back and chill without  big city rot or militant YUPpies like in Cali.  It just seems that the arrogant professionals are a bit to laid back about thier abuse of power.

Time to be on the ball I would say. Becuz I will stir up so much shit in this mountain town. Actually, real mountain towns like Kingman AZ are more filled with asshole perps working for the military industrial complex and the Illuminati cronies than this area.

I think it would be easy to go to authorities here and if clever enough, use east coast firepower to destroy the enemy. Retiring from the east coast to the west is just that- a transplant. Your still from the north east. Just becuz it kicked your ass with all its might and exiled you doesnt mean you were never from there and dont deserve all of a lifetime's knowledge...which of course is what the system is afraid of in the first place. They hate the smart one's.

The citizens here seem to be genuinely into social justice. Lets just see how true that is.