“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” --Maya Angelou

Sunday, January 29, 2012

The Bad Guys Always Walk Off Into The Sunset With The Spoils. Always..

Its interesting that certain people who once were obsessed with never allowing their faces to be seen by the public are almost flagrant in ensuring there are many pics not showing their faces in detail but of portraying them as very normal human beings.

The NWO has arrived and the people who helped bring it about can now rest easy. No consequences nothing to worry about for what they did. Their 'age' has arrived and people can openly live in this new set up. Its their world now and those of us of a certain age and who continue to resist are being left behind like ashes to a passing wind.

The world will never be as it was before the Bush administration simply becuz the public is asleep. They don't realize they've basically been pulled through a portal, is the best way to describe it. To those of us who are uncomfortable with the way this reality feels I am sure they welcome us to commit suicide or change to embrace this horrid place as it is now.

I still think writing how things got this way is valuable but it won't change anything for those who have been beaten by this system.
Its good to know that the information will be there and made available for anyone who wants it.

All IS lost however. The majority aren't too bothered by the way the world has become, the way things turned out. Their world still functions, they go on. The public continue their sleep. While those is us who were woken up during Bush may never sleep again until we die. They'll be no rest and no peace for us. This was most likely planned this way from the beginning.
At least writing down the truth and filling in the missing true timeline will stop some of the torment.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Justice System Not Functioning To Keep Order Is Part Of NWO


See what I mean? This is bullshit. The judge is in on it. He'd probably totally crucify a Targeted Individual but allows this crap to go on.

Their job is to allow chaos and destruction in order to help create a NWO.

America is Hopeless

Everywhere I go the entire country is just...gone. So many people are just idiots nowadays. Wannabe gangsta or YUPpie. The culture has just been destroyed. And gang stalking is so prevalent. Nobody cares is what they are doing destroys the nation. Modern people believe criminal activity makes America strong. The entire country is now run by these groups and there is no freedom. America sucks.

No matter where I go its always the same. And the groups of people who they support through 'Diversity' as well as Wiggers and Wannabes are the sort of people who will sell anyone out to get what they want or house slave it up to the oppressors.

Modern Americans believe they are smarter than people like me becuz they are part of the majority that hold power over the individual as well as have access to technologies that give them this superiority.

The NWO is a horrid place populated by dumbed down average people who think they are better than and smarter becuz they are in on a person being targeted. For those of us who know whats really going on and who don't like living under mass mind control or being beat down so other ethnic groups can divide us, conquer and flourish its a horrible life. Its terrible.

There's no where you can go to get away from the harassment. They have too many people and they always find out where you are. And the public seem to be very into someone being targeted becuz the masses are now reduced to mobs. Its become hopeless.

And in other countries that refuse to put up with this crap they just sucker them into taking in radical Muslims or Africans who divide so they can be conquered. And people don't realize its part of the NWO. Its going to totally enslave mankind if it hasn't already.
Being heavily harassed targeted and smirked at by vehicles at Walmart. Security in their little trucks can blow me by the way. Total intimidation/humiliation camapign. as if one citizen warrants all this attention. Guess they want the videocam to come out. smile mtherfuckers

filmed and they didn't even care. one old guy in blue truck with paper licence plate just kept it up. big perp group down here.

Taking Advantage Of My Having To Get Off Road Due To Health

Trying to walk to the store. I actually saw a woman watch for me down the road and then when she saw i was coming she pushed another woman out into my view who was wearing black and red. Saw another woman who was also conspicuous wearing this color combo. Many red cars mostly trucks of course with black inlay (trim).

This area are all desperate scum alot of them and its Mexican Mafia supposedly so i wouldnt put anything past them. They having a cozy relationship with the military at the borders- drugs, human trafficking etc.

The house I am in seems to be trying to keep me there and slow me down from being hearty from traveling. Also to keep me busy and tired. This is the Cinderella Treatment as my family used to do this. The perps in the Central SQ Cambridge area (all blacks-disgusting isn't it? That a white woman should be controlled at all by blacks. Thats COINTELPRO historically anyway. They can always depend on their house slaves.) would refer to me as Cinderella. It could have been local scum connected to my aunt Debrah's pimp named Honey (obnoxious black woman who should have been 86'd out of my uncle's house and her life since they got married-permanently.) or to Julie's operation. Whoever they were they can drop dead just like any blacks in on this who actually think they have any kind of authority over a white female.

The point is to keep me tired, busy and keep me in that moldy place becuz it will do more damage to my memory as well as dumb me down. And as I am staying in one place to ensure I can't find the time or keep focus to write or call lawyers

We will see about that.
I have to seriously reconsider staying in this location. Since it got colder at night and rain storms sometimes the mold is evident and its a problem. The couches and chairs can't be sat on becuz of what i think is dust mites but I am not sure becuz there are two dogs that are allowed up on the furniture. The puppy keeps getting fleas which you can see on her fur if you lay her down on your arms on her side. She had flatworms but those are gone according to the vet. I sleep until 1pm and can't sleep at night nor wake up before 1.
Tonight there was the smell of gas in my room and it was my roommate sleeping in here not me. It was from a car parked right outside our window in the neighbors driveway. This has never happened before either and I don't trust the coincidental timing of it as gas fumes and other respiratory damaging substances are used in gs campaigns except usually it gets into the room you are sleeping in and you can't figure out what the delivery system is.

Four women arrived today. One is the girl who patted her back pocket, the other is the girl who looks like me and seems to mirror me in philosophies and exact attitudes about life. And of course tried to get me to hang out with her tomorrow.
The other two have been here before. We now have four rooms with four women, not three in them.
All these women and two dogs one with fleas and not everyone does their chore to clean the place. Someone mentioned that the house should be immaculate at days end due to how many women love here. Its true.

I have started to eat alot again and I can feel I have actually gained weight not lost. I was losing it running around alot along with eating like I did on the road. But that got screwed up and I have a constant appettite now. My lower abdomen has alot of activity and feels like there's something up with my intestines. Its either something from the dogs or someone here brought it into the house.
Its too easy to start eating and to forget what my goal in life is. The longer I stay the more I get sidetracked even negative about my writing. I literally forget aboimut my work and to do.list.

Its comfortable. Too comfortable but not hygienic enough. If people like this want.to comprise their health let them.

Its safe and comfortable but the stress I think is too much. I think it not being run efficiently or with more enforcement of rules is making me nuts.

And starting to over eat in order to feel good is acceptable.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Five New People??

Five new people showed up. I was already suspicious with that. And one girl looks alot like me and magically has much the same ideas and story as mine. I am not buying it but I did give her some advice if she is genuine but I don't believe she is. It was too perfect of a mirror image. Totally manipulative. I also have heard from other tenants that there's never been this many people here at once so the entire thing is suspect.

The moldiness and humidity is making me tired and quite off. I will see if I can function like this perhaps by leaving for the day alot. I don't however believe San Antonio is going to be my kind of city. And there is something very surreal about it.

Its hard to be targeted. You do indeed feel like there's always a chance that something akin to the Truman Show is going on around you. You experience that much of the public are willing to be in on not being honest with you. Through this method you are kept isolated, and they are certainly working for the enemy becuz keeping you contained so you lose touch with what really happened or going after justice for yourself.

This is why TIs go crazy. Why the public goes along with these things I don't understand.

It doesn't even matter. They are obviously trying to protect the rich and the people who matter especially if Romney is up for election. I can imagine that they feel they are protecting his candidacy. THEIR interests.

Its so insulting for people to keep thinking the TI is this stupid. No one feels bad that the TI is this easily manipulated partially becuz they are brain damaged. The fact that no one has any sympathy or thinks thats wrong shows you that you are NOT around good people, your around more perps. Either that or they whisper secretly behind your back that you are nuts but don't realize it and are functional.

The on paper owner of this place told one of the women moving here to be aware alot of the tenants have mental health issues.

As usual the people of legit, socially acceptable society isolate you and judge you, then marginalize you not officially but in perception and then act as if they are part of 'normal' society and you are mentally ill and not of that accepted majority.

Which is just their way of allowing the system to get away with what its done to say someone like me so they don't have to suffer consequences for interfering.
I am so sick of people's dishonesty. Years ago when I was indeed acting crazy and self destructive no one DARED question me becuz I was friends with a rich and connected career criminal who I was of use to. I was more than socially acceptable back then....I was above it. Yet now it seems a majority of the entire frickin nation wants to help totally unsavory people to keep me isolated and believing there is something very wrong with me. And they keep sending mind f*cks to do it....and I am sick of it.

I refuse to believe that i am worthless merely becuz I am not associated with powerful connected scumbags or letting my family manipulate me or allowing my uncle to feel superior to me becuz he used his old connections to ensure his daughter could become a genetic engineer and part of that bargain was helping in the campaign to drive me nuts and into the street. That cute blonde miss perfect genetic engineer who's an ordained minister, her father as i recall growing up was associated with heavy Italian Mafia as well as my other uncle, who married into my mothers family, claimed he used to run with "heavy people", the kind that would shoot anyone.
That makes her morally superior? i think not. Its bullshit.

I think that whoever is behind this wants to keep me from my legal rights. That was always the ploy. The cops, detective's and their informant's behavior back home and across the nation was enough to let me know that.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Always A Problem Person In Controlled Communal Living In The US

There here is this fat obnoxious black woman who lives here. Shes older from Chicago. She was so effective in harassing me and laying voodoo down (with a bit of psychological warfare like she only intimidates me when i am alone and she thinks no one is around.) that i became so angry and spiritually effected, one night i wished she would have a heart attack and the next night she did.

I felt guilty for a moment but when she returned she is the same bullying, inconsiderate, pushy, ignorant piece of crape she was before. Shes still smoking too. Shes like a good 400 pounds.
She pisses me off becuz she reminds me of my grandfather so even though shes from Chicago she must originate down south or be from southern migrants. She has that same act going that real ignorant types have from down there-act stupid, intimidate people when they are alone and be as greedy as possible so no one finds out you know exactly what you are doing.

Thats the problem with these places-they always have a resident n*gger. Am i referring to all blacks? No becuz there's a young black girl in my room who I absolutely adore. Its the asshole stereotypes that make the world a miserable place. And everyone knows the difference so cut the PC bullsh*t. We've all had enough of that being abused by authority to create a race war to cover up for the class war.

This woman is psychically gifted obviously and she abuses it.
Tonight she told someone that they could "talk it up like that" referring to keeping her father alive who is in hospice:basically by wishing it to be true.

Her energy grounds the entire area of the house shes in but becuz she's so negative as a person her actions make her presence highly undesirable even if psychically she contributes something.

Psychics are often power trippers who abuse their power. I was totally racist to her and another woman when i arrived becuz traveling and being in cities houseless you HAVE GOT to be that way to survive nowadays due to the race war and active aggressions towards whites-in order to destroy us and part of this is a constant campaign to take the women, a typical act of war. Most people are just too stupid to realize thats what it is.

Shes wrong in trying to totally rob me of energy (and spiritual freedom) by being intimidating when i am alone. Its exactly like living with my mother who would pull the same thing. And Fay has a way of being very intimidating by catching you off guard.

I mean we are talking about real backwards and ignant. The way she talks lets one know who they are dealing with...and this isn't to mean that everyone from that environment is like her. She just happens to be a worst example of where shes from.

Shes also a Christian which is why I don't readily trust them. They do alot of good down here generally as in many seem to live and act on what they claim to believe.

Its people like her that make me distrust them.

I guess I also hate watching people be like my family members-be obese, smoke even after a heart attack and generally lose in life. I always try to be around successful people, even homeless. Train hoppers and travelers who are part of a social scene thats alternative yet established, connected historically to Americana like riding the rails during the Depression or being a hobo, with its own music, clothing styles etc (like surfing or skaters) as far as I am concerned are successful houseless people. Status in society has been achieved.
Ive got far too much various Earth in my chart for me to not want success and status even as a homeless woman. And knowing that alot of these kids are from filthy rich families or very intellectual backgrounds gives me secret thrills and a feeling of comfort, like being back home in the OLD New England, the real one before they gentrified it and sold it out to corporate and NWO. Its all very New Hampshire/Vermont and I love it. Its the only way to be homeless as far as I am concerned. If I ever get accepted to be part of a squat in Europe, one thats really doing something substantial, I'll probably feel like I made it to the mansion of sorts.

This system making me homeless has not stopped my natural inclination to rise in status above what is miserable, common very boring (homeless shelters) and really oppressive. Becuz honestly, being without a place to live inside SHOULD NOT BE THAT WAY-it shouldn't be that damned miserable and oppressive.
Most of all poverty shouldn't have to mean filth, dirt, disease and misery. IF YOU LIVE THIS WAY YOU CONTINUE TO ALLOW THE SYSTEM TO OPPRESS YOU.

Humans were nomadic and have camped outside before agricultural societies made us settle down. Why the f*ck is it so damned difficult to return to that?

There is a system in place in the USA that doesn't allow poor people to be creative and live well. Alot of off-the-grid living and squat houses are people from well to do backgrounds living alternatively. I recall I posted that I noticed squats would never get busted especially in Harvard SQ if the kids were rich kids but if poor people settled a squat for the night it would get busted. Says alot. But I don't resent that becuz I'm usually in good hands with the rich kids alot of the time. Alot of them knew who I was depending on where we were and seemed to sympathize. Think about it: they are some of the only people capable of countering the rich who are out to destroy and oppress us. Unfortunately that is how we must play it here in America much of the time. Many poor or middle class people are just nightmares or will get in the way of the fight by being manipulated without realizing it, they don't even believe there's a struggle most of the time.
One worker at a Womens day shelter who drives a BMW but certainly isn't rich or comes from money, looking at a magazine said "I hate rich people". To those of us homeless with brains it was puzzling. Didn't she realize that without rich people the shelter wouldn't get as much private funding or that we the squatter/travelers actually live off of the waste of them and thier system? That this is a trickle down effect?
Its people like this who you always wonder about-are they in on gang stalking and are doing it becuz they believe they are helping society or for funding or other motives or are they really that sucked into big pharma/ mental illness/psychiatry con job? Its hard to tell in a place as corrupt as Cambridge MA.

If its not the handlers being stupid or being house slaves for the oppressors its ignorant, selfish, self destructive people like Fay who are allowed to exist in environments like this. There's a Fay in every shelter, every day program, every rooming house. It seems like you HAVE to be from wealth to have a right to control your environment in America.
Unless you want to be part of alternative scenes which are controlled via ritual, self governance and self policing like the traveling scene. Which although dangerous and not grounded, with alot more time wasting than I like, at least provide the experience of a functioning society of people who are nomadic and live communally often with little money or resources and are always creative and usually intelligent.

What exists within the traveler scene seems not allowed to take route anywhere in America. Communes are now called Intentional Communities and there is a website-which makes me just as nervous as trying to rent a room off of the totally in-on-it Craigslist. (They are so in on gang stalking and perps themselves post shit to CL after they know a TI is in town. I used to gauge it to be about one week average. Then amazing room for rent ads would appear or 'room for female only pay $1 rent' pay with sex basically and of course when i still looked good and they were doing shit like sending amazing hunky guys from Vegas to 'accidentally' meet me in train stations and the poor things needed help with their luggage (?)...I always saw this as bs and a set up. Craigslist ads would appear like "hot rocker guy who likes to dominate looking for female" becuz they were working off of my relationship with Jake my ex of course. I always thought they were just playing games to make fun of me or to get me with a handler (like Scott tried to be) or of course to have hidden cameras or some sick shit like they pulled at the Brighton apartment but now I see that according to the spy world this was very serious and could have been male Honeypots. Simply to gain information, control over me and the like. Keep me diverted.

Unfortunately technology has made it easy for these cocos*ckers to at once surveille the public and be able to control them via blackmail etc as well as keep tabs on or gain lots of discrediting evidence against a targeted person. This way there aren't many people they can't gain compliance from to take part in gs. That may explain why the country seems just saturated with these people. Thats one portion of perps. Its the ones that seem compliant by choice that scare me.

The Citizenry Is Either Rotten To The Core Or Gullible As Hell

When are people going to get a clue that anti terror in this country was used to harass Targeted Individuals many of whom were government whistle blowers or victim witnesses to the mess that involved Boston, NY, 9-11, money laundering, government/private sector/organized crime?

So much continued human experimentation went on during the Bush years with the worst torture imaginable during Hayden being head of the CIA. Why is there not a law against the military mixing it up so much with the CIA? Its like having the Pope as president its a total crossing over of two factions that shouldn't be allowed to do so.

Muslims shouldn't be the ones viewed as the only victims here of spying. DID YOU HAVE YOUR LIVES DESTROYED? PROBABLY NOT THE THE EXTENT OF TARGETED INDIVIDUALS.

The public are going to view this as more total disregard for law, liberty and the Consitition that was and is necessity to fight terrorism.

YOU ARE BEING DECEIVED. These things are being done to create a one world order and police state. If that sounds paranoid then YOU ARE VERY NAIVE CONCERNING THE NATURE OF POWER AND CORRUPTION.

They hide in plain site nowadays by utilizing diversions like foriegn enemies such as terrorists. They also make sure a tightly controlled media and press doesn't allow the truth to be exposed.

People who aren't UFO nut job conspiracy theorists have been mapping this out for years and still the public don't want to listen.

Its your own fault then. Whatever becomes of this world, some of us will fight until our deaths and the rest of you can remain pathetic slaves in your comfort zones.

I am sick of morons in this country gently smiling at me as if to indicate oh what a shame i got f*cked over by the 'bad guys' and the system.

You really are dense aren't you? Either you are naive and stupid to what went on and what its progressing into today or you are a slave and part of the corrupt system, you think its normal and you like it that way.
The worst is that you know exactly whats going on and you know I was duped or an a useful idiot as far as the system is concerned.

You're an idiot. I have it all mapped out and have for years. People like me all around the world know whats up. Stop smiling gently at me. Its morale destroying and controlling AND YOU KNOW IT subconsciously. Do you think you can keep me controlled that way?

Never feel pity for me and do not misconstrue me as a fool or stupid. I am doing my job by being quiet about what I know until the time is right.

I have done what I feel had to be done to get a certain result. Your stupid slight smiles or head hanging pity BS are either manipulative or pathetic and within the context of the big picture you are meaningless.
These actions show that such people are totally controlled by the system in place one way or another.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Trying To Keep It Together In A House Full Simple Women or the title may simply be: Aaaaaauuuuggghghghgg!!!!!!

Ive heard tonight that the woman who came home drunk last night has done so before. If nothing was done about it then nothing is going to be done about it this time. However the incident has allowed me to understand who the people that are full of shit are and its pretty much who i thought it would be. One of the supervisors is someone i just knew I couldn't trust anywway. She actually asked me last night to go and keep an eye on the backyard while she went to bed becuz she claimed the woman who smelled like liquor and her friend who lives here as of a few days ago, and another resident and her male friend were smoking crack back there. I think if that was the case and she actually believed that then she would have really done something about it.

Her and another woman took my shaken up state of mind and jabbed at me. This one woman tries to be friendly but you just don't trust her, based on the fact shes so codepedent. Also some of these women interrupt me when i am trying to finish sewing projects (after cleaning alot all day or being out walking many miles). i won't tolerate interference when i am writing or doing a project. Its my time. The women who don't work everyday want company and I don't mind socializing sometomes but won't get sucked into the black hole that IS a house full of used up, American older women who can't understand how to.grow, change and strengthen beyond the level they are at. And i can tell some of them are offended. This is a major danger for every TI who has to cohabitate with and socialize with people they are only around becuz the system has crushed them and severely limited their options in where they can live or the types of people they can socialize with.

I do all kinds of stuff around here just to keep busy and lose weight. These birches took advantage of last night weakening me emotionally and tried to do this pathetic indirect conversation concerning trying to get recognition for cleaning.

Whats strange is that while the obese black woman was here before her heart attack i kept getting strong psychic impressions from what seemed like her room (which is right off the kitchen) that warned specifically that these women would turn on me or anyone for that matter. Perhaps our psychic ability is stronger when we are nearer death.

And so its rung true.

Women are so powerless in this society i mean socialized to be powerless and stupid and they lash out anyway they can at anyone stronger becuz they are akin to a drowning person. And they will pull you down as well if you let them. So many American women are like this. I mean look at how many are involved in gang stalking, a predominantly male run operation much with male centric motives. Traitors is what they are. And thats all they are.

I wonder if these idiots realize that if they stifle me and help destroy my ability to write my book that they are helping one of the worst pedophile networks and other criminal activity to succeed and flourish? They don't care and they aren't awake enough to even realize such things touch thier lives at all. They are too insulated and selfish and petty jealous and weak to comprehend that.

What they did is probably based purely on jealousy, misunderstanding a person and judging superficially perhaps with a bit of help from the disinformation system giving them cover story info so they feel the TI needs reform or needs to be FORCED into feeling remorseful for the carefully chosen parts of their past the gs system has the public focus on, while the real criminals have great lives of course.

Its useless to try to be honest with people about who you really are. Mostly becuz of the risk they will get in on the ever running camapign to get you labeled mentally ill, its always one of the greatest risks throughout a Target's life. Even if one presents a case with documentation that could have been drawn up the greatest lawyer in history, a large percent of the masses will still insist on percievng the person as mistaken due to the truth being too much for thier minds and pride to handle. Americans like to believe they are a free people basically. They don't like realizing that never was the case in any empire and certainly not in recent times in the USA. Much of America is under very deep severe cult mind control or brainwashing made possible by being very traumatized and intimidated by the last two administrations. If not the last four.

So people often misunderstand the Targeted Survivor of mind control especially women of this kind who get resentful if they feel you aren't opening up to them and joining the tea party. Sorry I really do have more pressing concerns.

This is why I get misunderstood alot and I really can't afford to care. Public awareness about these technologies as well as psy ops in American culture is a bit more important. Especially with Romney up for election which is a disaster mostly due to the Mormons being involved. Ive discovered throughout that they are one of the most dangerous factions involved in world affairs recently. Their presence in the southwest along with the military, where so much horror has been experienced by many Targets. Many perps including people in the media are born into LDS and seem in on harassing Targets even if they don't realize it what they are doing. And why would they? LDS has the ability to program people. Its obvious. Many RA Survivors are from LDS families.

There is something very strange and off about these little Mormon communities in the southwest...and elsewhere. Thier close proximity to the military out there in the middle of nowhere...Ive experienced and seen things over the years. And Elizabeth Smart's family was very off especially her father. The entire thing was just too convenient.

The Mormons are not only up to something thats getting very big but they are just off. There's something very not right about what Ive experienced out there year after year of going through the southwest.

And Romney is a very very baaad idea. Hes basically been approved by Bush. Elder Bush. Not good.

So i must keep going with what I am doing instead of allowing people around me to interrupt at all. Or weaken me or make me insecure. I realize even if they do not that they are pawns of the very negative side of this war.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

But I Like It Here

Hey don't get it wrong. i really like the place i am in. The women are civil, even nice people. And if they are religious they actually act according to what they believe. And they do not proselytize. It also doesn't have the institution-of-the-state run like a damned prison like the shelters in the northeast.

We want for nothing here. (well except when i run out of funds i need to find somewhere to get eggs yogurt milk shampoo type stuff but the rest is here)

Its the content coming in through what is probably tech. It ends at around Midnight but not completely. Like I said its constant wifi, satellite tv and many cell phones as well as being within an L shape of some ridiculously large power lines. Not as big as the ones were very near my maternal family home in Waltham MA but almost as large. That house had so many factors influencing the environment. Everything from a basement that flooded to power lines to Polaroid and other companies polluting Rt. 128 (the Silicon Valley of the northeast). My poor family kept holding onto the house becuz my great grandfather built it and my grandmother was born in it.

I have realized that where a person lives has a great impact on their health overall.
And we have to realize it with a changing environment so our health issues are going to change and we have to respond accordingly. Often to save our very lives or at least quality of life.

I don't like being in this place and not traveling. Yet this is often necessary to get solid work accomplished that simply cannot be accomplished while traveling. I also have to admit i live in a mortal body that ages and breaks down and needs repair :( and tend to those issues..unfortunately.

Up All Night

I don't trust the place i am staying completely. Its definately targeted and there's always the risk of the behavior modification having a push to become Christian in a place like this.
My last roommate i didn't care for as she had this sense of having a better than opinion of herself of the quiet. She left thankfully becuz she was a total energy sucker. I hated just being around her physically.
But at least she was quiet.
The next one i got who is still here is an older women who will NOT shut up. She doesn't have the psychic vampire ability as the last woman who was around my age. So this older lady uses the control tactic of talking to me constantly and its more annoying than the last woman becuz my grandmother used to do this. My mother called it 'mad chatter' as if it was done innocently or u knowingly but i believe such women know what they are doing. Its a way of controlling a physical space or situation. i helped her move in and she was nice and thats where i stop being suppoertive to the new person outside of helping them find their way around the house. Its simply New England style being considerate and civil. But after that the person should understand you have your own life. Either this woman is dense and thinks she can be go dependent on me now constantly becuz shes needy as he'll or someone informed her i am either targeted or a cover story about controlling me and keeping me down being a good thing in the long run or some other information that changed her into someone who's pestering me constantly and being needy. She texts me from work yesterday for f*cks sake becuz she wants to talk. i am jet roommate not her friend.
She blinds me with her constant attacks of useless chatter. She talked to me right when i woke up yesterday and that was just too much. I snapped at her for forgetting her key and getting locked out.

Its a control tactic. She just came from the local shelter and shes still in street mode. Not the way she acts but the way she thinks like in response to her environment.

i had this room clean. as good as it was gonna get. now i am miserable becuz i am having constant problems at night again with dust mites. (if u r allergic to them its like having fleas attack you from your bedding but just at late night.. but its very distractijng to feel things jumping and crawling on you that are so small u can't see anything there.) And no i am not imagining this as i looked it up as well as got q red mark in an allergy test years ago for dust mites. So it must be coming from one of my new roommates. Also the older woman has some clothing in her closet that smells like mold to me. Many people in this area seem to have musty clothes but they don't notice sit-up strong laundry soaps cover up the smell which for a chemically sensitive person just makes it worse. The mold of course i am totally sensitized to now. I can smell mold even when other people don't notice it.
Good luck getting women this low functioning to understand why i want all their clothes laundered here when they arrive.

My other roommate is a young black girl. Shes very nice and shes like me shes balanced between quiet time and conversation. Shes generationally native to tech so shes got her phone to keep her company.
But i don't trust the putting a black female into my room as random. It might be but I don't know.

This place is Targeted but one has to consider that perhaps the owners are oblivious to this and its done with tech without their knowledge.

The older one is must needy. I don't trust her trying to gain control though. The rest of the house is OK. Nice actually.
Its cold at night now but it was warm a week or so ago. Years of perps doing abusive sick sh*t for years leaves a Target paranoid of any living situation.

I gotta stay though due to health issues.and its genuinely supportive other than what i just griped about.

been up all night, afraid the motor mouth would wake me up this morning. Not a chance now. ill pass out and be out for hours I'm so tired now.

hopefully the ignorant oldster will mellow out.

Friday, January 13, 2012

Being Harassed Everywhere Now And Targeted To Go Back On Road

I got messed with in Walmart and that usually isn't the case. I get constantly hit with ideations to leave the place I am staying. that I should be traveling and that I am meant to live in a much better place with like minded people.
And where might that be? Most whites nowadays are subjagated, oppressed scared people or they are total wimps or worse...Liberals or YUPpies.
Where is there a cool neighborhood for me? Somewhere in Europe perhaps but not here in the US...unless u have money or long time connections.

And where pray tell is this magical neighborhood I am supposed to find by going back on the road?
I understand that the place I am staying is a bit moldy. But its very mild compared to other places I could be staying and the only place that isn't going to be an issue is the southwest where there are no places for me to stay and I have never encountered people I could live with who are like minded.

This system just wants me 'on the run' so I can't get health issues dealt with or get stable enough to produce meaningful work especially my expose.

Harassment In My Neighborhood, GS For Sure Not Normal

gang stalkers in this area are trying to make it unpleasant to go outside even for walks. their most recent tactics consist of waiting in deserted parking lots with lights on facing me as I walk by (like brighting) and just when I have passed and feel very watched they then and only then pull out of deserted lot. For people to be parked in deserted lots after dark with no other business to attend to it seems and only leave after I have passed by is tactical and its meant to work off past sensitizing of the Target. Brighting with automobiles has a long history in my campaign. And using males in trucks backs up the idea I am helpless due to being a female alone.

The cops have also made appearances lately with perfect timing but that could be them actually doing their job in this area since its sleazy. I could also be being protected its hard to tell with cops becuz they have been both covertly helpful and the worst gang stalkers ever (becuz they are trained professionally they're harassment and abuse of that training is especially damaging to Targets).

If this is done under the guise of community watch I will have your balls in a sling soon enough. Its no problem to start to become involved politically locally especially with so many problems down here.

the thing about this type of harassmnnt is I would have to film a few consecutive examples of people waiting in cars in dark abandoned lots.

and with how sleazy the area is, the crooked cops or anyone else could claim its a high prostitution area therefore they were cruising. which is bullshit becuz I have been cruised around here repeatedly and they always stop, watch and ask if u need a ride. They don't wait drive away on cue and make sure to ignore you no matter what u do.

its probably also to get a reaction for more evidence of public insanity like losing my temper..which I don't do here.

I notice that a lot of the women I live with seem harassed as well especially on the bus. a guy tried leaning on me the way a man was doing to one of my housemates on a bus last week. she got vocal about it but when the man beside me tried the same thing I didn't react becuz in Boston no one considers crowding rude and ignores other people.

once again evidence of an entire network of perps and Targets as well as evidence of a very male legion of perpetrators who harass female targets. I've posted before that there are a lot of men in on this and I have spoken to extremists who believe women are to blame for male homelessness as well as the world's problems.

they may very well serve as Cause Stalkers even if they know the entire story which I doubt if they are smart enough to understand.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Internal Bleeding Again Raises Questions Of Priorities

I'm bleeding again. The exact same issue as was in MA last winter.
The common factors seem to be staying inside where there's continued mold exposure even if its mild. I was also drinking harsh instant coffee the same brand last time this happened and I just bought some a few days ago. I am gave it away today so I can see if that improves anything. There are other possible changes in diet recently.

I know its not severe like hemorrhaging but at some point in future whatever tear is present may worsen so I have to do something.

Being a Target its never an easy decision. I know that traveling and sleeping outside I am healthier than anytime I am housed and in one place. Unless you are wealthy in big cities you are going to experience mold and shit environmental conditions. Its inevitable I've discovered. The way America is set up is you work hard to AVOID unhealthy living conditions. It shouldn't be that way but it is. And many workers have unhealthy conditions in their jobs so home might be the only safe place. Not exactly the American dream is it, to make people such slaves to ill health. More money for the medical field I suppose.

If I go back to MA I will get neat down one more time by the racism there as well as its a complete electromagnetic nightmare. Yet there's one hospital that has treated me well in my past health issues and I sort of trust they wont try to assist this system in killing me with a 'mishap' or 'accident' on an operating table.
The state I am in now I don't know about. its potentially dangerous, theoretically anyway. I haven't tried any services here so I don't know.

I would also have to finally stop my MA residency, another move that would just crush my pride and ego even moreso. It might also complicate any legal actions I wish to investigate in future. Yet it pisses me off MA has gotten away with not having their insurance and services used by me, partially a result of the intimidation in hospitals and by medical staff I've experienced there over the years.

I'm also afraid to move residency becuz I don't know if some high end legal stuff is what makes me the kind of target I am in The Commonwealth Of Massachusetts as opposed to what kind of conditions my campaign would take on or have changed if I became a resident of another state. At some high level what was done to people like me must be legal somehow under Bush as it was executed. This means that being a MA citizen may have protected me...or made it worse I don't know.

its what they don't tell the public that often is the worst of it.

Is it better to chance dying during a surgery BEFORE the book is out or to get some version of the information out first????

Internal bleeding is worrisome, but not as much as one's life's work never coming into being when that is all one has to define one's existence.

Its rare times like this when I really don't know what to do that I hate my situation.

Often I am given ideations here to go back to MA and face them and sometimes that I should go back to the southwest as the desert weather is better for my health.
The problem with going back to MA is aside from my health going downhill immediately after arriving there, there's no place to stay and its winter. I refuse to subject myself to the racist, backwards blacks there who handle the poor like house slaves for the rich in that area. Never again am I tolerating that ghetto bullshit. EVER.
Secondly the remote influence, if you will, is so overpowering there, I wouldn't be able to accomplished much anyway. They have a system set up there to capture people like me and keep you caught in the maze, uselessly running on this hamster wheel and as long as you are there, your life will consist of nothing more, nothing better than that. MA is dead as far as I am concerned. Aside from Lexington and other locations with enough money to preserve their cities and protect or seperate themselves everything else seems to have been sold off. MA has sold out to the system and its completely useless now. I think people around Nixon, the roots of the NeoCons, foresaw Liberal, Kennedy MA (especially Cambridge) being a problem in pulling off the NWO. Which is why I sense traveling that places like Cambridge and Berkeley CA are more heavily managed with tech and gs than other locations.

MA has been subdued for a reason. Going back there would be nothing short of self torture.

To be fair, if this is truly what Angleton warned about, Communist take over of the US if not the world, then those locations would be controlled due to their standing up for justice and freedoms but also they are more easier manipulated towards a Communist agenda-as long as the freedom fight part of the culture was controlled.

If what Angleton talked about is what's happening that would explain why I am actually safer away from such locations as MA and CA.

Note in my post last night featuring the 9-11 numerology page, it mentioned one of the people who died on a 9-11 flight was the author of a book about corruption during the Clinton administration.

Is it going to be as easy to get rid of anyone else writing such things? It seems those of us without education, established cred and who have also been discredited are less likely to be murdered.

Then again Whistle Blower Syndrome was no fun during Bush and yes, they do try....to murder you. Or frame you. Which makes no sense as wouldn't I be dead by now? I think the recent bunch of jerks prefer torture over murder. Which of course assists with intimidating the public who is looking on at what's happening.

I keep getting these notions that I should give up becuz I've already been beaten etc etc. All the BS they tell you in the beginning of a campaign going 24/7. Know your place, accept your situation blah blah blah.

As usual everyone can go f*ck themselves.

The book is more important than a mortal body.
Which of course they probably planned to have me hung up in at this point becuz I am acting and thinking just like a cult member- ready to die for the cause when in fact I know my book will probably be ignored or people will pretend it and I don't exist.

Lastly if I go back to MA everyone will continue to act as if nothing happened anyway. Its hard to get justice for something when everyone is responding with 'what are you talking about?' type sentiment.

Oh everyone would just love if I died wouldn't they. The scum in MA and NY are satisfied that my potential and future were taken from me. Now I am just a minor inconvenience that has to either die or grow old and go silent.
They really feel they won already. That the entire thing is just done and over.

Not until its revealed how this situation we are all living in now was CREATED by covert actions and influencing of events will this all be over.

Not until I get my past back.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Continue To Not Comply

It seems like I am always being chased out of places like major cities. As if the system wants me to have a better life somewhere away from cities. I know that my health would do better away from wifi, saltellite TV, cell towers-electromagnetic pollution as well as various other kinds of pollution. But where am I supposed to go? I only understand how to function in cities.
Also what guarentee is there in a rural setting I will be safe? What about access to a hospital due to my allergic reactions?

This happened to my mother, she conformed out of fear for her long term security due to years of being targeted (though she will never admit to that- most people still will not accept the reality of their situation and choose to instead to stay sided with what is social acceptable and consider TIs to be mentally ill. These people are ultimately weak. Citizens who are not targeted are often open to our claims being valid. Its unrealized TIs who are most afraid of the truth).
She became this other person and her lifestyle did not reflect who she really was. Her creativity, uniqueness and intelligence were not reflected. She allowed herself to be frightened into being something she is not. Which is worse than suicide or being murdered really.

The GS system definitely seeks to silence dissidents or control artists with an audience and a voice.

The more weakened we become and health fails and the longer time passes with our dreams unrealized the easier it is for this system to work on Targets and convince us that conforming is the best option. That our Willfulness is not working. Its the ultimate in the 'acceptance' concept in Narcotics Anonymous or brain washing generally.

They will use anything to get you to conform. To be in synch with the false timelines they have created (by influencing events). Always remember it is false. There is no legit reason why a talented, intelligent person should not excel especially in the US if indeed this country is what it claims to be.

Long term behavior modification as well as keeping the TI mixed up, confused and sounding like an idiot most of the time so they can't make a sensible case while they are still Willful about countering this system is what GS is all about. That's if you don't commit suicide or get labeled first.

What they want ultimately is this disgusting sense of peace that is totally induced therefore false and for the TI to be 'happy' or content with their lives. To accept their situation.

Long term brainwashing is what is used. This is why the system tortures Targets and then later surrounds them with people smiling or denying the situation is as bad as it is.

They do this to help the Target through the torture. Why? Becuz they want to destroy the person in every way possible without allowing the outside world to witness what is going on or leave any evidence. This is why many Survivors of mind control projects or programming seem happy and acting as if nothing is wrong. They know that these Targets specifically will utilize the system of alters to survive being tormented so heavily. WITHOUT THE USE OF TECHNOLOGIES NONE OF THIS WOULD WORK.

I've come to realize the importance of their utilizing tech as its used not only in individual cases but for mass mind control.

The only reason this post contains any decent expression on my part or isn't just me complaining or venting as usual is becuz its Sunday and I've posted many times that nationwide that seems to be a day, as well as holidays, where the usual program of remote influence is not functional.
Also this location though its an electromagnetic nightmare, is a lot less difficult to navigate through daily than say, Massachusetts or California. In places like Cambridge MA even on Sunday there are effects experienced as a Target and its impossible to function there its so heavily managed. Interestingly the most heavily managed places using what seems like tech are the most historically Liberal places in the United States.
Ironically for freedom of thought or to exercise the Will, you'd be better off living in a Conservative or Republican place nowadays. MA, NY, CA those are all gone now. They exist physically but they are tightly controlled with massive, constant organized stalking and harassment and influence from technologies and most likely chemical controls as well, chemtrails being an example.

The place I am in now is not ideal as there is WiFi, satellite TV, multiple cell phones and its a poor area so the air quality is not healthy. Yet it has a quality to it that makes forging ahead possible. And the living space itself- where the hell else am I supposed to go? Its not like livable domestic situations present themselves to Targets frequently. Its very rare. And there's always a trade off, your situation is never truly improved-its a.personal preference of what kinds of torment you can tolerate better than others in the interest of getting your project completed.

This is why I am forever suspect of there being 'promised lands' being presented by the system in different ways.

African slave culture always spoke of a promise land. That is a natural thing to create for a people so subjugated by overbearing forces. It resembles a traumatized victim surviving by finding a 'happy place'. However, the true key to freedom is not in investing all our hope into some future space and time but to deal with directly the cause of our enslavement or oppression to begin with.
A promised land is constantly being presented by the system in various forms from simple to complex. Such as 'if you go to this location you will be happy. There are people waiting there for you' ideations. These are deceptions and often they are to lure the Target into very dangerous locations. Places where they would be in physical danger. Then you have actual human perps who will in ear shot will look at you and say "Have fun up there" after you get a strong mental suggestion to go to a location. Nova Scotia for example. When I was in MA before I left, escaped really, I kept getting this mental suggestion to go to Nova Scotia and 'just go quiet for a while'. That was going to improve my situation and stop the harassment.
I asked around about Maine and its desolate up near Canada. Later I researched and realized not only is that a major drug running route but Nova Scotia is now a very electromagnetically polluted place due to some radar left up there. It was totally insane for me to even consider that course of action: brainwashing. Plain and simple. This is how strong this system is in some areas.

Yet I will always question: who was right and who was misleading me? Perhaps I could have gained the best outcome by being up there and 'going quiet' and those perps were scaring me into not doing so to screw me up. But is it the other way round? Could my going have been disasterous and those perps' purpose was to wake me up out of the brainwashing?

The frustrating part is I will never know. Unlike whoever is behind gang stalking I cannot predict the future or calculate outcomes with complicated math formulas or whatever they use. I am jammed and interfaced so much of the days that I can't do much of anything.

If they aren't trying to get you killed they are trying to force you to conform and be content through brainwashing.

Both are false outcomes manipulated by their influence.

Neither should be tolerated.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Clarifying Rich Kids

Lets clarify something about squatters. I am talking about rich kid posers like at infamous squat houses. Places like Hellarity with PC squatter kids who find me as well as other types of people unacceptable. Who knows or cares why.

Its a bit hard for me in the United States in this situation. I am 40 not in my 20s. I don't party or screw a lot due to my health issues and I am primarily focused on my activism. Though younger kids are open to me and helpful their sense of having all the time in the world is very different from my feeling as if my book is going to be my swan song. Their activities and goals are different. I don't make friends easily, I never have. I make quick connections very well and operate just fine among strangers or in strange environments enough to survive but I am not good at gaining stability. America is not as it was and people just don't invite you into their houses anymore, perhaps its my age also. Most people my age who are serious about doing something have access to resources, all my access has been blocked. Everywhere I go I cannot get an accurate read on people becuz I can never be sure they aren't decieving me by actually being in on the campaign or if they believe cover stories so aren't going to be genuine with me to begin with.

I've met plenty of helpful rich kids many nice ones. But the squatters I have seen just put me off from trying to investigate squatting in organized squat houses. Perhaps I simply haven't looked hard enough. And then there's the trust issues.

Usually other travelers aren't perps but in San Diego this small group of kids who looked just like travelers gang stalked me outright around town even pulling shit on buses. That is pretty unusual. Then of course there are the scumbags I met at drug running/dealing Rainbow (A camp is gonna suffer a black ops assassination if ever one day I get any money and power. That fantasy is going to be manifested. Arrogant agro hippie f*cks. None of them Italians but all of them were idiots. One motherf*ckin day payback is due. Shawney is a nice place for.that..only one entrance/exit with no feds or rangers with A camp at the entrance. Their greatest power position in that location makes them a wonderful group of easy pickings in the middle of the night from tree tops with silencers, after their booze has been drugged of course. Buddah gets no easy death and is taken out further into the woods for 'special treatment'. Not drugged of course. And lasting hours. If only I had some money and criminal friends. Sigh...)

Yeah those sleazy snooty scenes piss me off to no end. Their infiltrated by either agents, rich kids from dirty money or drug connected people. They suck. And I don't know if there are actual cool squats becuz I am always focused just on survival while traveling.
(Doing drugs is different from dealing drugs like Rainbow. And there have been weird kids who seem in on this like in People's Park too.)

Yeah I meet a lot of people who seem very into wasting my time for either mob connected drug rings, prostitution rings or whatever. They all suck, they all ultimately work for the Man and its never what a serious, focused activist is looking for.

Anybody f*cking with me or getting in my way is working for the oppressors I don't care how they market it. Unless of course they are typically stupid gullible average nobodies who can be easily manipulated into mobbing me.

In all my experience Americans have been all about doing nothing but keeping me down. Keeping me from things I want. Keeping me from doing things or having things that other lesser people are allowed to have. Americans for the most part have always mistrusted me even as a child. Ive always been singled out for bullying or exploitation.

That's becuz on average most Americans are dumb. And I'd like to get out of the US to see if I get treated any better outside. America will never work for me. They only believe in the rich or people they deem worthy having things easily. People like me are treated as if we have to work extra hard and are constantly held back. Americans are jealous inferior under achievers who shop to make a soulless mindless existence livable. Is it any wonder why they have always hated ME? The European who never got broken down into being an American. Its best if I try to see what's back in the ancestral lands.

Perhaps the past 15 years has changed the entire West so anywhere I go will seem unworkable. Becuz I was kept from growing since the late 90s and put on ice since 2003.

That's not true I do have a lot of aquantances but I never had the stability for life long friends. And I am not good at getting into places like squat houses or scenes. I guess I am too obsessive about whatever work I am doing to be social.

Sickness From Being Indoors pt 2

...regarded as part of the normal human population subject to laws nor protected by them.

In El Paso the staff mixed straight bleach no water with Fabuloso which Mexican culture is fond of. Fabuloso is ammonia based. They used this combo to clean in an unventilated area. It was horrible. The entire shelter was closed up completely.

So many people seem unaware or stubborn about mixing bleach with ammonia to clean. That combo was used as chemical warfare in WWI. They'd put the combo into shells and drop them as bombs. Look it up.

Chemically sensitive people are affected by this strongly. The bad attitude of shelter employees is usually that clients are imagining things, that this is THEIR way of doing things so too bad that's 'the way it is' or they tell you to go stay someplace else. The general attitude in many cultures across the US is that "shelters are supposed to be a temporary situation. They aren't supposed to be comfortable". Well they are largely govt, state and city funded so those morons are masochists I guess. This typical bullshit is handed to them by house slave staff members and clients parrot it mindlessly. Either that or they can't deal with being homeless psychologically so have to convince themselves of this to stay strong and make it 'out' or backed to the mainstream, Capitalist ideal of being in a domicile with all their material possessions around them. Whatever.

This social embarrassment and humiliation in clients is used by the shelter system to keep it sub par in standards.

Its one of the things I'd like to change. It would be a great revenge on such an arrogant abusive white collar criminal run system to cost them money and make them straighten out and fly right. Maybe they need forced behavior modification and coercion in order to change their ways?

And to take away America's privilege of having a peasant class they can scapegoat and shit on for social and political convenience would give me endless great pleasure as well. I want to make it cost them, big time. While of course helping those who can be helped.

Outside of all that I just wrote, here is the paranoia (which is legit for every genuine TI): that there is some sort of purposeful warfare against this house and the women in it to make them sick. It isn't unheard of. I can think of many motives which I wont get into here.
I would say its just to target me but I haven't experienced sickness being used directly as a biowarfare agent in my campaign. I was just fine here until two nights ago I felt illness in the room. I can actually feel when someone near me is ill and is going to make me sick as well and I am always correct. Its a sort of smell-like sensation or maybe I can feel it some other way. I know it though. Usually I get away from the person and I am not affected. Using Lysol spray works also. Prior to my anaphylaxis from Bactrim that induced allergic reactions I would simply take herbs that fight sicknesses.

This situation was all very different. It seemed to be coming in from the windows, perhaps the heat vent. Someplace in the room. It didnt seem like I was making contact from another human being. How can that be? The heating vent was fine two days ago.

Whatever the source of this it burned my throat in the early morning hours yesterday morning. I would feel like I was getting sick from laying in my bed. Like the source was there, near the windows or the heat vent in the ceiling.

There was a woman who came into my room to talk with me who just got out of the hospital a week or so ago. She had been away this week. She had walking pneumonia. But that doesn't explain the presence of sickness in my room.

I opened the windows, used Lysol, everything you can imagine. Everything that normally works for illness gotten from other humans.

I don't trust that this place isn't being hit with something like that. There's a military base nearby, the place is owned by a Christian who's family has a long history of working to genuinely help the disabled. The city has a lot of genuinely godly people and it has an underground Satanic scene as well. This is also a very poor area. All these factors make me wonder if this place wouldn't get targeted for motives of financial, political or spiritual warfare. It could also be the women in this place are also Targets and don't realize that.

I do know for sure that after years of experience as a lone Target that the gang stalking system is indeed capable of doing something like that. In fact that action matches pretty much what they are about. Its what they do. And there is no question if they have the resources or cabability to do so.

One thing however. The woman that had walking pneumonia is a person who's had exposure to military life as well as bases overseas. Her kid was born sick. I don't trust the US Military when it comes to pollution or disease as their track record is herrendous. They experiment on their own people and they want and get results at any cost.

With how monitored I have felt here the entire thing is questionable. I know getting back to traveling would be healtheir but where am I supposed to go? Most cities I get targeted so I can't function or think if not then I get gang stalked and kept from doing anything AND that makes me start freaking out on people so more evidence for being discredited.

My health has been ruined to the point where no matter where I go there will be problems especially with mold sensitivity. There's no dream place like a homeless-hostel-squat type place made out of concrete steel and Yang materials with a commune of travelers and artists that keep the place livable. If there is I probably am not welcome becuz I am not a rich kid poser or a Hipster I am actually a true houseless, traveling dissident and that's not accepted for some.reason. Who cares why. But there just isn't any real freedom for the poor. Especially if you are a threat.

Sickness From Being Indoors

The women here are all sick supposedly with a cold. The owner wonders why everyone keeps getting sick all the time.

Firstly the air vents for the heat are old like the building so its probably dirty.

Secondly the women don't do.their chores like they should so its not clean clean which always prevents sicknesses from spreading.

Thirdly they worship bleach down here. If you use chemicals too strong concentrations (most Americans do) you are messing up your body's ability to assimilate to the natural environment. Its something I've learned from being chemically sensitive (due to long term damage from that moldy apartment) and being a traveler as well as an urban camper or sleeping in truck rigs.

What makes homes dirty enough for people to start getting sick all the time is a combination of staying in one place too long and the inside of a building not being able to get as clean as nature does for outside.
The only 'dirty' places I've slept outside were dirty due to humans making the area dirty the way we make every place we occupy dirty- the accumulation of germs and bacteria due to repeated use without proper cleaning.
Places in cities where humans have dirtied a particular area that doesn't get cleaned. This is the number one problem as an urban camper outside of authorities making it impossible to camp to begin with. Some of the spaces you have to choose from are hidden so they aren't cleaned by whoever cleans for the city or that business.
But I always noted that it was due to repeated use by humans or animals without exposure to the elements or humans cleaning the area.

The spaces in cities outside as well as your home inside are not movable. Concrete with fixtures in cities can become dirt ridden for different reasons. In places like Boston the age of the area makes it so dirty over centuries that even the elements can't clean it as well as city workers miss these spots.
In newer places like San Diego it simply doesn't rain or snow enough and temps don't get down low enough to kill things. City workers may use bleach or wash with sprayers but that doesn't make it healthy. Bleach certainly doesn't. And bleach doesn't kill lice or mites. Its a joke.

The best remedy is always to assess how healthy a city is for urban camping. Use coverings like cardboard AND tarps and don't let anyone or their gear get too close to you.

Travelers who urban camp seem to do best and I am convinced its due to not staying in any one place too long.
I note that if I catch anything uncomfortable I always can get rid of it simply by hitching a ride to a new location.

Being housed inside a structure set up like most modern Americans live usually makes me ill eventually.
People tend to not clean enough in hard to reach or not used areas but then overuse chemicals in main areas. Its not the dirt in the main area carrying germs its the space behind the toilet and the layer of dust you can't see above doorways on top of high up structures like appliances, shelves etc.
Use of strong chemicals in laundry and in cleaning only give your body more crap to fight and process toxins. UNATURAL crap at that. Chemical companies don't want you to think about nature outside being healthy they want you to percieve it as a threat. Dirt outside in a clean less urban environment isn't going to make you sick. Dirt inside and harsh chemicals is going to make you sick.

Old vents To heat are a nightmare so is carpeting. Who knows what's between the walls or in the ceiling. Its what's in hidden untouched spaces that we don't think about.

They turn the heat up here and that made me sick even before everyone got a bug. After sleeping outside through the night heat up too high is weakening to my body. And my body being exposed outside as well as traveling is what has made me fend off sickness for so long. I wonder about insulation as well. After having to leave my first room here due to my roommate being around it at her construction job I wondered what the hell does it do to us in the walls all over a house!

One of the ideas I came up with in Brighton during Bush was perhaps if houses were self regenerative-if they existed somehow as we do or nature does outside. Always cells dying being wasted and growing anew.
The reason inside is so deadly is becuz inside your home doesn't get exposed to wind, rain, snow or dirt and these things are part of a constant process of 'cleaning'- death and rebirth of materials just like our bodies do.

I looked at my apartment one day, with the all the sick building syndrome it suffered as well as the mold from the burst pipes, and I thought how the structures we live in are akin to dead bodies. Corpses. All the materials used simply rot and have to be replaced and anyone not having money to do that is stuck with a 'rotting' old building. This is what makes people sick in building like that.

The materials that are used to create these environments are toxic also. A chemically sensitive person knows this better than anyone else. The rugs smelt of phymeldihide (I know its misspelled) the paint is also unbearable even from an apartment across the hall. And in old buildings these chemicals used to make an apartment look new actual add to the toxin load humans have to process on top of mold etc in the building.

Unless you clean a structure properly inside as well as making sure the building is healthy all the bleach in the world in common areas wont make a difference. It will only add to your bodies list of things to process and act as a stressor.

Dusting is imperitive and no chemicals are necessary. Carpeting is a horror and my wet dream is ceramic tiling (like all the flooring in AZ is made of) or wood floors kept up or good ol' concrete. You can throw rugs on top of it..and best of all you can throw rugs away or sell nicer ones. No mysteries about what's under carpeting. (Which is disgusting I've seen it. More chemical materials more BS).

Soft comfortable things are disasterous. They can pick up germs, mites etc. Having chairs with any kind of cloth on them in a communal living situation with high turn over is totally unhealthy. Most places I go like this I can't sit in common areas as I feel something crawling and jumping on me in couches and fabric covered desk and kitchen chairs. Dust mites is usually what it is and if you get tested and are allergic you will experience knowing all too well they exist even when many other people don't seem bothered by them.
Cloth, pillows, blankets, couches, chairs, cushions and mattresses- all things that can pick up dirt and germs and keep you sick. People who live with a controlled population (family, friends, roommates, not a lot of strangers) or alone wont experience the repricussions of high traffic communal living inside a structure as I usually do.

The problem with all places that make people sick o have mentioned already. Its either in the building itself, its areas that arent easy to clean or people aren't thoroughly cleaning the inside as they should as well as overusing harsh chemicals.

Lack of ventilation is also a problem. Again you are dealing with being trapped inside a structure that is basically rotting from age. There is no wind, no rain or snow like outside.

If old sick buildings were exposed to the elements they'd prove unfit and be washed away. Rightly so becuz its dead wood and flimsy materials.
I would love to live in a concrete steel building with only Yang materials-glass, marble, metal..things that are hard, solid, stand up to time and are easily washed. Paint wouldn't even be allowed in the house nor carpeting. Simple but practical.

At this point I would rather sleep and live in dirt outside than anywhere (I can afford to live) inside. Dirt at least gets cleaned daily by the elements. Inside a structure everything just sits there and I notice I just start to sit there as well. There's no flow. And a 'nice' apartment with 'nice' people isn't the answer either. Those can be just as stangnant or have health issues. To make Inside more like Outside or to let nature inside, safely would be nice. I am sure there are clever designs that most Americans don't even know about that create a healthier living space. I am sure the construction, mason and other people who make money off of what's already in place prefer it that way.

The main offenses with using chemicals are using too much, not diluting enough, combining chemicals improperly and using them on surfaces not appropriate to the chemical.

One sees examples of misuse in homeless settings where staff are not OSHA trained or disregard it or worse- they allow clients to do the cleaning.
Only the slightly mentally ill would use Ajax powder straight to clean a floor. Then mop with a slightly damp mop. The powder residue afterwards is quite noticable- except to staff. San Diego day shelters do this and its a health hazard. Its illegal I believe in many ways but remember- the homeless population are not

Being Psycho Managed Down To The Detail In Current Location pt 2

...they can escape or avoid any disaster or the slow poisoning and destruction of the human race and other life on earth.

Notice since 9-11 and since companies have gone 'green' in so many bullshit ways that really change nothing, that the environment is no longer a pressing issue.

Yet total psycho management via mass mind control of the public has been instituted during the war and Bush/Obama years, under the cover of diversions.

If I leave here its just going.to be the same thing again, me traveling and breaking my back to carry that back pack. Near constant worry fear and adrenaline may keep us in a state of health and fitness (except for our bellies where all that cortisol gets stored with fat) but I feel like its taking years off my life.

I know this place isn't perfect for me but my home state is polluted beyond belief and MA is totally military industrial complex as well as home to much elite and their interests. I cannot possibly ever go back there again to live or for any length of time. Nowhere in MA is safe. And this constant harassment to go to UMass is just ridiculous. Last time I was there some conditions there, whatever they are produced in me a tear in my intestines and I had internal bleeding. I became very unhealthy just from being there for twelve months. I gained weight and became very tired all the time.

No fuckin way am I going back there. MA can kiss my fuckin ass. Yeah kiss it GOODBYE becuz I am not falling for that 'I miss my hometown' shit again.

Circumstances have changed in the world nowadays and I can't just make choices that I would have if the circumstances were normal or what they appear. MA has been degenerated into a horrible place where only the rich, their house slave populations and the regular guys and average citizens who participate in their nonsense are allowed to exist there. There is absolutely no place for a poor white female with a brain and artistic talent to exist there. Its simply not allowed anymore. I refuse to move back there and be abused further.

And that is probably what the system wants. More lies in order to get me somewhere that I can really be laid into by the system. Your hometown is so very dangerous becuz you are weak there to emotional ties and sentiment. I learned that the hard way and my internal bleeding last year was my final lesson. There is something in MA or Boston area that can make this injury manifest in the body. I don't know if its weaponry or simply my body has been so exposed to mold and it did damage to the point where new exposure simply continues a process of breaking down the body.

I know I can't live in MA or the northeast at all. Its an impossibility.

And I don't need to be made into a proper female thanks very much. And I am not crazy either.

Per usual I am going to write that book and I WILL do my hair and conduct my affairs any way I please and see fit.

This system still doesn't understand that I really fancy myself a 'gentleman' from the old days. Part of me naturally believes that you should not interfere with my affairs. Like the rules used to be hundreds of years ago. I just happen to be female that's all.

I cannot believe how a female exterior effects the perceptions from the world around me. Its ridiculous. I'm a person in here you know.

Help and direction or teaching or advising are different from outright coercion.

Being Psycho Managed Down To The Detail In Current Location pt1

I feel very monitored in the place I am staying. There's much attempted behavior modification and as a system it plays very 'tight'. Like a band would be described. Every judgement is clear and every move I make is judged.

I am trying to figure if its video or something more sophisticated. It seems like whoever is doing this, the gs system, they have a way of monitoring that isn't direct like video. Its like the through the wall tech described by Eleanor White on Raven1.net.

As usual around 4am is heavenly with all feeling of interface disappearing for an hour or two. Many cities are like this.

Last night I cleaned up my hair style that is a shaved part of my head that had grown in. As I did I got a response basically that someone heard me using the shaver and that I shouldn't be shaving my head becuz I am trying to be something that I am not with this hairstyle.

As I got the shape basic and the hair was off in the beginning of doing this, I got this sudden perception of myself in the mirror as a horrible child molester becuz of this hair style as it looks a bit punk or brutal. And a small ideaton with this was that I come from such a person therefore I should be guilty myself. I had been experiencing a soft persuasion to grow the hair back lately but its not what I want to do right now.
I also got the idea that a certain person in this house was thinking that I am trying to be something that I am not by shaving my head.

Whoever it was they were pissed I did it and especially that they lost control of my behavior which they had been trying to manipulate softly towards other actions (growing my hair in).

I got a cold, lungs and nasal. Since sleeping outside and traveling I shake these off regularly and don't catch them as frequently. Being inside is what has gotten me sick.
My point in telling this is that every morning I get woken up by the women here early and then later in the day by hallway noise but also at night along with the train waking me up at night so my sleep was off. (My body reverted to a stay up all night schedule now just to get some peace and quiet which is not what I wanted.)
I notice that since being up coughing last night this morning I have experienced total quiet. None of the usual nonsense and noise from the women.

I don't trust that there isn't behavior mod going on here either consciously or them being targeted to act in certain ways that would be part of a harassment or behavior mod campaign.
Remember people lie about us. They might even tell the naive public that we were programmed and this is all necessary and good to give us 'normal' lives. When in reality the gs system only wants to silence Survivors testimony as well as create boring normal average citizens who will now conform and then by controllable. One informant told me that I had to be "made manageable". They've succeeded in everyone guilty of crime not being put away for life and I am discredited. But its not enough they have to continue to behavior modify. Becuz this isn't about a federal investigation its about MK Ultra. They made sure I was exposed to mycotoxins which did brain damage and as LSD was used in MK Ultra to 'soften' the mind and help make it more easily shaped by the controllers after the person was depatterned. They've 'blown' my mind if you will over the early years during Bush especially with torture, stalking, harassment, chemical warfare and random risings with light hallucinogens in public spaces (the perps with spray bottles during Bush.)

After they destroy your reality and current adult sense of self they have you under control at a certain stage. Then they work heavily on behavior modification and focus on getting you some sort of normal life. Yet its normal according to what the system deems. Too average. They basically want the Survivor returned to population with no traces of high intelligence, talent, athleticism or beauty intact.
And in my case they are obsesssed with making me strictly female in the way I dress etc. Even though I have very feminine qualities to my movement and appearance they want to remove the masculine -the warrior alter is what they want gone.

I also thought I heard one of the younger women talking to one of the supervisors about Rainbow which I am thinking is a reference to my attending gatherings a few years ago. I only heard the girl say the end of the word "Rainbow" and the supervisor say "I've been to Rainbow". It could be a totally different reference like a local club or something. Yet I was thinking that if the perps told these people that was being an irresponsible 40 year old and going to Rainbow etc that it would be easier to get them to 'help' by being part of a campaign. Either they would know only that I was being irresponsible at 40 as a traveler or they would know about my being screwed over during the federal investigation and them 'helping' me is to help me recover from what was done to set me out into traveling life to begin with.
I shudder to think they know about prigrammig but I myself have public view blogs telling my story so its possible. So why wouldn't they have understood by now that behavioral conditioning and behavior mod on a human being is only destrucitve?

Worst case is people are still so obstinate to believing what Targets are claiming that they simply believe I am schizophrenic and the only way to handle us is through repeated training of what is and isn't acceptable via behavior modification (gang stalking harassment etc)

Becuz I knew so much about Julia and her business they have had to be very careful I don't spill that information. However the public may still be convinced I am a schizophrenic who was simply hiding for years and functioning within the adult entertainment industry. They may also be convinced that around early 30s the mental illness gets worse and this explains why I lost control living in Brighton MA. The standard cover story from psychiatry/big pharma might be that the schizophrenic becomes progressively sicker with time and age thus this explains my claims about gs, becoming a traveler etc and my reduced functionality.

The public may be so resistant to believing the truth about the radiation experiments and MK Ultra or Project Paperclip etc that they would rather buy into this particular cover story. I don't know.
What works for the perps in this is that due to claims I am mentally ill and thus incompetent, my family or other authorities trying to run the life of a woman well over 21 is acceptable somehow.

Its always hard to tell if the public know what's going on, what version of cover story they know, or if they know about programming etc and still are taking part to 'help' the Target or if they just want money, favors etc...or that they no nothing at all and I are just being manipulated by the system to act out in ways that would benefit the campaign against a TI. Sounds paranoid but you don't know what I've seen over the years. Technologies and chemicals are now capable of influencing and controlling human behavior down to the last minute detail myself included. Since I know its present I knew to start finding ways to resist. If people don't know they can't resist. They think its their god or devils talking to them or giving them ideas or directing them to take certain actions or their own subconscious. They don't even know they are or can be manipulated.

This doesn't seem like a place with a mercenary nature that would act purely for a payoff. But they might if Christianity was the end results or reforming someone. There's a military base nearby. That might be the source. Its real close but its in the city limits.

I have also been getting strong ideas-visions everything to get back on the road and travel also to go back to MA and handle all my business from there. That's been the greatest harassment to go back to MA. This morning it was that I didn't have to live in the cities I could be outside somewhere rural and healthier.

There is NO PLACE in Massachusetts that is healthy anymore. The only places left are way up in Maine where the air might be cleaner especially in winter.

Our environment is getting worse. Psychiatry is the perfect cover for humans as a species humans as a species slowly getting sick overtime due to this. And terrorism/the economy the perfect recent diversions.

If this planet becomes uninhabitable or the masses slowly go insane due to being polluted to death you will then see why very wealthy people are buying up land containing underground tunnels, investing in the space programs to inhabit Mars or why there are already people living on a space station as we speak. Virgin company has already had their first space shuttle rides for those who can afford it. And that is just another indicator of what's going to happen in the future.

If the public are controlled especially if it can be done remotely from a space station or underground then the elite or select can escape any disaster